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We were worried about too many dances also, so we combined both parent dances into one song. We also cut out the anniversary dance, though that is a nice idea and if you open it up to all married couples, then people won't be bored. I wouldn't space the dances out too much because it is hard to get people back onto the dance floor after they have left. As for the dollar dance, if it is common in your family/culture/region then go for it. If not, you might want to skip it.
Ok, I will address the "money dance" situation first. Is it common in your group/culture/region to do it? I think that if it's a cultural/regional thing, than it's ok. I wouldn't have a complaint. I've never actually seen it done. I've heard all about it ... from WeddingBee, but here, nobody does it. I'm not one to say it's tacky or whatever, I just don't like to lable something with "tacky" because I think that a wedding is so personal and ultimately it is up to you. If it's your dream to do a money dance, do it.
To me, a first dance with my fiance and a father/daughter dance is enough pre-planned dances. It will get pretty boring and do people really like to watch other people dance... I know I don't.
I agree about combining the mother/son and father/daughter dance. I do not think dollar dances are tacky if its common for the region and/or the DJ runs it well, other than the dollar dance there isn't really an opportunity for everyone to dance with the bride and groom. I think they are fun!
We also combined the mother/son and father/daughter dances, and I was so glad! After our first dance, which was a 5-minute song, I was wishing we'd picked a shorter song for the parent dances. As someone who was dancing and enjoying my special moments, I felt like anything beyond that would have been boring for guests. Even if you did the anniversary dance later, you may be kind of cutting back on some of the natural energy of the evening by excluding certain people from the dance floor.
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I'm another person who isn't the biggest fan of having a lot of dances. We'll be combining our mother/son father/daughter dance for sure. I was at a wedding once that felt like we sat through 4 5-minute songs of special dances before we could get up ourselves. Definitely gets boring. Just make sure if you have tha tmany dances that the songs are shorter? I wouldn't space them out through the reception because once everybody is all in their dancing zone, it's a bummer to quit!
As for the dollar dance - totally depends on your area, like the others said. I've never been to a wedding without a dollar dance, and people have mentioned it to me that it's one thing we absolutely shouldn't cut! But we're all just really used to them.
I think it's too many dances. People don't like to watch all those dances. We're doing the combo dance with parents too. If I had my way, we'd only do the bride/groom dance, but I'm sure my father would be disappointed not to do this tradition. If you really want to do it, just make sure the songs are short. And, I agree ... I wouldn't spread them out. If you want people to dance, you gotta keep a nice flow...
re: the dollar dance, you may want to think about how you want the spirit of your wedding to be. In other words, if you're doing it for the money, how will that feel to you?
I agree with combing the parental dances. I am personally not a fan of the dollar dance, but if it's something that is done at weddings in your region or in your culture, go for it. I could never do it, I would feel very silly. LOL
4 songs? come on thats nothing. Most people are talking to the people at their table any how. You might want to cut the LEGNTH of the songs though. We cut all of them down to 3 minutes each (trust me, it will be long enough)
Agree with pp on the dollar dance, if its common in your area/culture, go for it... if not? don't do it.
We are doing just the first dance and father daughter dance; it's not tradition in england to do a mother son dance; my fiance never even heard of it! whew thank goodness. Luckily my father daughter dance is only 2 minutes
we are definitely doing the money dance, we call it money dance andnot the dollar dance; it is common in our Filipino tradition I'm definitely keeping my traditions; and yes all money dances are fund-raising no need to beat around the bush with that, in our culture it's how the community contributes towards the beginning life of the newlyweds I dont think it's tacky at all but rather touching-same is true in other cultures like the Chinese and Italians where they give cash gifts in cards; well-wishers are helping the newlyweds along as they start their lives
think people need to be more open minded
I agree with cutting the length of the songs down (not for yours, of course) and using them all (you don't have to combine father/daughter and mother/son because you may have different songs that mean a lot to each pair) but for the anniversary dance I would space that to be farther along in the evening-I went to a wedding where they did that and it was a nice way to break up the dancing and get everyone who had not been dancing yet interested again. :)
I'm agreeing with alot of the othr posters. I don't know if I thik having a separate song for mom/son and dad/daueghter is that bad. If you want to cut it down, you can either dance at the same time, or have one pair dancethe first half, the other the second half, etc. The parents' dance, I'd advise against. I do however love the anniversary dance, as long as you open it up to all married couples. And I agree putting it somewhere in the middle of the dancing works just fine. (And you can do the part where the DJ asks people to step off based on years married. You could honr the longest married couple and your parents' anniversaries with a small gift.) And people will be more receptive to the dance after they've had a chance to stretch their legs.
I also need some advice. Mr. MM and I both have remarried parents. I'd like to dance with my Dad AND step-dad, but Mr. MM doesn't feel that he needs to dance with his step-mom. Should I forego dancing with my step-dad? I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I think his step-mom would feel left out if she's not included and my step-dad is. Has anyone else been in this situation? Thanks!!
I personally really don't like the money dance. BUT, it's your wedding, do what feels right to you.
I agree that it's too many dances! But guests expect it, and I don't think they'll complain. :) If you spread them out a reasonable amount, it should be fine.
As for the money dance... I don't think it's tacky. I think it's an Eastern European wedding tradition, and some other cultures also have a version of it... so it's ethnic! ;) But if you do it I think you should explain it and the background, so that people who might have thought it was tacky will understand it better.
I'm doing all of them... but it should work out fine because I have 2 dad's so they will each get half of whatever song I pic, and I am letting my FI's mom pick a song that is special to her for her to dance to. We're just going the 4 (f/d, m/s, first, and Money) at the beggining, and maybe doing the anniversary dance for all couples in the middle, and then I will be asking the couple that has been married the longest to give us adivice and they will get my boquet. = )
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For starters, the money dance is totally area/culture dependent. My eldest brother and sister-in-law did it and everyone had a good time. It wasnt tacky, everyone expected it. But for the crew that was coming to our wedding was different and we didnt feel it appropriate. Chances are, if you're used to them, so are many of your guests. If you've never actually seen one, they might not have either.
As for combining the dances, talk to your parents first. My Dad would have been DEVASTATED if I had cut down "our time".... but his mom wouldn't have cared. If feelings are going to get hurt, it is NOT worth saving 60-90 seconds.
I think we'll be doing our first dance, father/daughter, mother/son, and an anniversary dance (in lieu of a garter/bouquet toss). I hope people don't get too bored! If so, too bad :) lol
I might also combine some of the dances, just so it doesn't go on too long. At my cousin's wedding, they did SO many special dances (bride-groom, bride-father, groom-mother, bride's parents--some sort of anniversary, wedding party, anniversary dance, Dollar Dance) and people were literally sitting there WAITING to get up and dance. We were pretty bored and everyone was talking about how we wanted to dance.
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Hey Bees,
My fiance and I are having some disagreement about the programmed dances for the reception. I would like to have the father/daughter dance, mother/son dance, our dance, and then a dance for our parents and anyone else who has been married so many years. My parents' 25 year anniversary is 3 days later and his parents have been married just as long. He thinks this is way too many dances and our guests will be bored. I'm thinking about kinda spacing them out with normal dance time in between. He still claims that our guests will hate it.
And my other question is about the dollar dance. Is it tacky? Obviously it would be great for honeymoon cash but I dont want to offend anyone by having it or feel like an idiot when no one comes forward for the dance??