- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 1999
ugh am i the only one who just cant pick something??? ud think that i would know what i like, and when i see it, id get it. but being able to just design anything my heart desires seems freakin impossible!
i cant decide on a single thing. not a theme, not colors, not aisle decor, not table decor, not stationary, not which e-photographer i like. nothing feels right.
i try on dresses and i dont feel anything.
i look at photos, photos, photos, and more photos. i look through magazines, books and more pinterest, etsy, and weddingpaperdiva pics than u could count.
all the photos r gorgeous. but i think hmmm i dunno, and i just go to the next one. or i see one thing in the pic that ruins it. that looks cheesy. this looks old and out of style. that one is too modern. that one doesnt have matching stds in the package, or that one doesnt have a menu card. how can i choose anything when i cant pick a theme or colors?
scared to pay for the venue because i dont know how big my turnout will be, but dont know how big my turnout will be until i send stds with rsvps, in which case i need the venue reserved! its an evil cycle of stress!
im scared to commit to anything because shopping online means i cant pick up anything and feel it, turn it over, examine what its made of, ask anyone my questions, or walk away with it after i spend my money.
so, go to the wedding store, you say. who has the time? who to go with? my mom lives 2 hours away, my fiance is zero help. my coordinator lives in the virgin islands where our venue is. my friends might not get invited to the wedding depending on how many family members rsvp. so id feel weird to make plans with my bff when she might not even get an invite later.
basically, im just scared. scared to spend the money, scared to commit to anything. is this normal?? would most women take the money and spend it in two days??? ive been engaged 7 months almost and have gotten almost nowhere. and ive got 12 long months to go.