(Closed) Traditional mother in a non traditional wedding!! How do I handle this?!?

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I think the most important thing about this is this is YOUR wedding. If you try to please everyone around you, you will lose the individuality of your day. I think it is important to be open with your mother in law and tell her that choices you are making are representative of you and what you want not of what everyone else wants. Sometimes parents mean well but get overbearing because they feel protective and feel that they “know” best. Its a hard situation to deal with for sure. You can involve her in many things! The trick is to involve her in things you’ve already planned out. For example, get the supplies for your DIY projects, make one yourself and take a picture. Then, have her comeover (and others if you wish) and explain the process so they are helping but with something you’ve already chose. You’ve got to stay true to yourself. Make sure your FH helps you in standing your ground too! 🙂 Hope this helps!

Post # 4
Member
1183 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

It is your wedding! I have had to have this discussion with my mom too! She wanted something way way way over budget AND totally not our taste. 

 

If you are paying, it is completely up to you! My moms helping out big time so I have to comprimise on a lot with her. 

 

Maybe let her set up a wedding webite? That really doesnt matter that much and she will get to be in charge of something. Or include her in the mundane things- like RSVP’s guest lists stuff… stationary… 

Post # 5
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

It’s your wedding. You need to have a talk and tell her how she making you feel. I think it’s important to emphasis that it’s your wedding and your choices that make sense for you and your Fi. Invite to the third and second appointments with vendors when things have already be chosen. So she doesn’t feel completely left out I don’t think it would hurt to give her one or two things to do with some direction of course.

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