Post # 1
Bees, I need help with a tricky situation involving guests and invites. We invited our all of our bridal party’s parents to our wedding. With one groomsman in particular we contemplated inviting his 20something year old brother (lets call him Chris) as well since he does hang with us in the summer, but then thought if we invited Chris we may feel like we need to invite all the siblings of our bridal party as well since we technically see all of them occasionally.
Well, we received the rsvp from Groomsman/Chris’ parents with a note that they are attending, and Chris is very happy for us and sends good wishes.
Now we feel bad that we didn’t invite him and want to extend the invitation to him but don’t know how to do it without it looking like an after thought. He lives at home with his parents so it’s not like we can pretend his invite got lost in the mail.
Even though the invite was mailed to “John and Jane Smith”, what if I said something to Chris along the lines that I received the rsvp and I’m really sorry if we didn’t make it clear but he is also invited if he is available.
Please help me figure out what to say!!
Post # 4
Just send them a message and say he is invited and you are sorry if you didn’t clarify that in the invite. You were in hetic wedding planning mode. I am sure they will understand. That is IF you want him there. However, their response on your RSVP was a bit of a snub (IMO) that you did not invite him. Like a nasty nice response if that makes sense.
Post # 5
@Pink Asawa: It doesn’t sound to me like Chris feels like he is invited, just wants to send his regards. I wouldn’t do anything here.
Post # 6
I would not invite Chris and I would judge them all favorably in assuming that Chris has nice intentions. You are not obligated to invite people you aren’t really friends with, and not everything needs to be dramatic because its a wedding. There is already enough stress involved in planning a wedding.
Post # 7
Yep I would do exactly what youre thinking of doing, well say something to him like,hey we got your parents rsvp, darn we were hoping you’d be able to come too, do you have other plans that evening, because if you don’t, please come.
Post # 8
Can you accomodate all the extra people if you DID invite all the siblings? I dont think you are obligated to invite them by any means, but you said you are social with them. Invite people that you want there to help you celebrate. If you have the room to invite them all, then invite them all. If you want to invite a select group then do that. If you want to only invite Chris and none of the other siblings, then go with that. But I also think sending well wishes does not neccessarily mean they are wishing they had been invited. They may just be happy for you.
Post # 9
If you want to invite him (which you don’t need to if you’re feeling obligated) then your plan is good. Just contact him and say he’s invited but you didn’t clarify on the invite.
Post # 10
We did want to invite him in the first place, but as we started to cut back our list we ended up not doing it. we think is response is kind of like what @ashleyr0512: said (nice but with a jab) because I think he would love to come. The hectic wedding brain is a good excuse and definitely true haha