- 8 years ago
- Wedding: January 2012
My Fiance and I are going through a really, really rough time right now. He’s had some major budget cuts at work & he’s taking a huge pay cut. There are only 4 guys with his job & 2 have been cut already, so a cut isn’t that bad considering he gets to keep his job. A handful of things have gone wrong for him financially in 2009 & he’s not coping very well. He also didn’t tell me he was having any problems until last month. Since telling me, he’s become a shell of a man. He’s embarrassed & completely depressed. I’m flying out to see him for the entire month of February to do some damage control & get him some help.
The biggest shocker is that he says that he doesn’t want to file my immigration paperwork “just yet” due to the costs associated with it & he wants me to cancel the wedding. My paperwork is in our lawyers hands… waiting for a payment & then it will be sent. I’ve offered to pay for all of it & he won’t accept it. He keeps saying “What kind of a man am I if I can’t afford to pay for my wife to move here”, etc. It’s so frustrating!! He wants to get married on a beach, just the 2 of us. He’s wanted that from the get-go, but I knew my family would never accept it.
Now that our marriage & future is hanging in the balance– I’ve lost the desire to plan our wedding. I am willing to forget everything I’ve planned & meet him on the beach tomorrow.
I feel so helpless & really, really scared. I feel like I’m losing him & I’m 3000 miles away already. I’ve sold my business, I’m getting ready to sell my condo… I’ve made all these steps to be with him & for what? For total & utter confusion. My heart is so torn. I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m frustrated & a little heartbroken.
We’ve lost a huge part of “us” with all this wedding talk and planning over the last year. LDRs are hard as is, but try planning a wedding apart. It’s so stressful doing it on your own & I would just overwhelm him with wedding questions when we would talk. Online, on the phone or by smoke signals– nothing but wedding talk 24/7. I never even gave him a chance to talk & explain whats been going on with HIM.
So with that… I need to say so long to the hive for a little bit. I need to invest all my energy into helping my Fiance & fixing our relationship. Reading about weddings, etc is really just getting me down. I’ve already cut back my posting since the news first broke, but now I need to cut all ties with WB. I want to be happy & excited for everyone, but its just too hard right now.
I really want to say that you are all incredible women & that you have been a wonderful addition to my wedding planning experience! I’ve loved every minute on here with all of you 🙂 I’ll hopefully be back once things become more clear, but until then: I wish you all the very best in your planning!
I’ll miss you all like crazy… haha what did I ever do online before WB!?