Post # 1
this one particular thing keeps happening with FI’s family, and I’m trying to take it in stride but it’s not going so well… they keep looking at my registry and then buying things that are *similar* but not actually what I put. on purpose.
some of the substitutions are okay (I registered for a collapsible red silicone colander, I was given a standard red colander, no biggie.) Others are not okay (I registered for a small cuisinart food processor, I was given an enormous Sunbeam food processor that all the reviews say doesn’t perform well and breaks within months).
I’m registered for Wusthof knives… I cook a lot, including a lot of veggies, and working with meats – filleting fish, breaking down whole chickens, etc…. I did a lot of research about knives, and considered durability, performance, cost, and how they felt in my hand. I just got word through the grapevine that FI’s aunt looked at the knives on the registry, made a list of what types/sizes, and then bought all the equivalents from Cutco. First of all, Fiance already has a set of Cutco knives which are nice but I’m not as happy with them – all my research says that the Wusthof knives are better in terms of durability and performance, and the Wusthof knives feel better to me than FI’s Cutcos. I appreciate the gesture, but people seem to be making the assumption that I waltzed through Williams-Sonoma hap-hazardly scanning whatever was most expensive.
I understand that not everyone would like to shop from the registry, and that’s fine… And I understand that not everyone has an appreciation for high-end cooking equipment. (I keep hearing things like "You have to replace it every few years, so why buy the expensive stuff?"… Um, if you buy the good stuff, you *don’t* have to replace it every few years!) But anyway, I’m frustrated to keep getting these "close but not quite" gifts… I wish people would either get me the things I put so much effort into choosing, or else get me something off-registry from their hearts… the substitution gifts say "you asked for x, but you shouldn’t have asked for it because you don’t know what you’re doing, so I got you y." AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGH!
Post # 3
Ugh, that sounds frustrating. 🙁
Where are you registered? Most places will let you return items for store credit… maybe you can use the credit to buy what you really wanted?
Post # 4
My family can definitely be like that. They just don’t get that just because you can get a food processor for $20 doesn’t mean you SHOULD. Also, some people look at a registry and see "kitchen stuff" and assume you’ll be thrilled with any kind of kitchen stuff. Are any of the gifts returnable? You could also try selling unwanted gifts on craigslist. I definitely know how you feel though- for some of our weirder gifts, I just couldn’t keep myself from thinking "WHY didn’t you get me a gift card?"
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
Wow, that’s the worst kind of frustrating because if you admit that you’re frustrated, you’ll be seen as ungrateful. But it is a truly annoying situation! Hopefully you can return the things they are getting you.
Post # 6
i totally understand what you mean and dont blame you at all for registering for better quality items. i too have spent alot of time sorting out my new kitchen with hubby to be (we dont live together yet) and buying high end but long term purchases have been important to me also
hopefully the majority of your guests will use the register instead of what FI’s aunt did
Post # 7
thanks for the affirmation, everybee 🙂
good call about selling on craigslist… I think part of the problem is that, although we made a point of registering at stores that were near our guests, there are *other* stores nearer – I think a lot of our Southern guests are shopping at Walmart or Belk’s rather than making the slightly longer trip to our registry stores.
I found out the rationale behind the Cutco knives… for those who don’t know, Cutco hires college kids to sell the knives. FI’s aunt agreed to let a friend’s kid come over and do a sales pitch, and he was very persuasive… they do that demo where they cut through a rope in one swoop, and she figured they must be as good as what I registered for. They’re not at all usable for how I use knives (I took a cooking class where I learned one kind of grip, the Cutcos have "ergonomic handles" designed for a totally different grip), but they aren’t bad knives… I’ll sell them or regift them, probably. Although I certainly won’t regift to someone who’s registered for other knives ;-)!
Post # 8
i totally agree about cutco- I used to work at a kitchen store so I am REALLY picky about what I use. Wustoff are good- especially if you like the handle! I really like Shun also. If my relatives did that it would be back to the store!
Post # 9
Ugh, so annoying! I only had one friend who did that and it totally annoyed me. I registered for a few items that are supposed to go together (like a platter and a glass cover for it) and she bought individual parts (like only a cover) that are similar to but not the same as the ones I registered for! So now not only can I not use HER gifts, I also cannot use the incomplete gifts from other people! Yikes.
Post # 10
we ended up getting some pretty wierd, pretty random stuff. but i agree, the gifts that were kind of like what i registered for were the most frustrating. In the end, i returned everything I did not want and put it towards something i did. luckily, a lot of stores carry the same thing.
the really wierd stuff (roosters) and really not our style stuff (forks and knives from fingerhut) all got donated.