Post # 1
My FSIL just announced today that she is pregnasnowing her third child and due in February. While I am ridiculously excited fr her (and to be an aunt from day one!) all I can think about is how it will affect our wedding. I’m not getting married until July so the baby will be 5 months old, but it’s still a lot of logistics. I feel we need to go start looking at bridesmadds dresses now so she can feel comfortable with her size purchase. I also want her to be bale to enoy things like the shower, bachelorette party and day off getting ready, but how will she do that with a nursing baby? Of course my biggest concern is tht there will be a five month old at our wedding! I was worried enough about her three year old and six year old, but now there will be another! With both her and her husband in the wedding, I don’t want my future mother in law or father in law having to babysit while their son is getting marride.
So while I am so happy for them (and when they told us they kept saying, thisowing affect your wedding, don’t worry) I still can’t help but feeling selfish about it will affect the wedding. I feel so selfish but it’s one moretjingto take into consideration
Post # 3
@NVACat: You sound a tad selfish. Yes absolutely, it is your wedding, and I understand your concerns. But a new baby, a new life, is far more important than one day. Everyone will get along just fine throughout the planning process and the big day. And it’s her choice to either partake in the festivities or sit them out. Do not put unwarranted pressure on her to participate in the showers/parties/drinking/etc. She has a responsibility to the life she is carrying, moreso than she has to make you happy.
My sister is my MOH and is due pretty much tonight. Wedding is in September, so my new niece will be a wee 2 months old. She has another daughter who will be 2. We went dress shopping around 4 months into her pregnancy and ordered two sizes up. Dresses can be altered. So no worries there.
Let it go, there is nothing you can do here. Be happy for her and DO NOT make her feel like a jerk for being a mommy.
Post # 4
Try not to worry and make it more of an issue than it needs to be. Yes, it may be a good idea to look at dresses early just so that there are lots of options and no time pressures, but 5 months postpartum she will likely be back to her regular size or close to it (ie close enough to order a slightly larger size and alter accordingly).
I suppose it could play into challenging logistics….but that’s life and I’m sure it will all work out. She sounds very supportive and like she’s very aware of not letting it “overly” affect the festivities.
Post # 5
When your wedding comes around, I bet that you’ll be so overjoyed to have a new little baby in the family, that you will wonder why you were ever worried in the first place. Everything will fall into place; a new baby is not going to ruin anything. Your wedding will be beautiful, and your shower and bachelorette will be special. Try to focus on things that you can control and be happy for your FSIL.
Post # 6
To be honest, that five-month old likely will be the least of your worries that day. Tiny babies really do not make a lot of noise. His or her three-year old sibling, however, may be another story. 🙂
I also would not fret over your SIL having to nurse the baby while at your wedding. I don’t know how long your ceremony will be, but, even if it’s an hour, it’s probably possible for your SIL to work her feeding schedule around the actual ceremony.
My three-and-a-half year old ring bearer literally screamed through a significant portion of my ceremony, including my vows. He was distraught because someone thought that the rings on the ring pillow were real, and took the pillow away from him. (I had no idea what was going on, but I later discovered this when I saw the video.) His sister was the flower girl and started tormenting him during this time as well, and both of their parents were in my wedding. The kids ended up sitting in the front row with my parents (their grandparents), and, yes, my parents were distracted to tend to them while DH and I were getting married.
However, DH and I still had the most amazing and wonderful ceremony, and, in hindsight, it really was not that big of a deal.
I would suggest that you consider offering your SIL a great deal of flexibility during this time. You could encourage her to participate — or not — as her circumstances allow, in any pre-wedding parties such as showers and your bachelorette party. The most important thing is for her to be standing with you during your ceremony and for her to appear in some of your formal pics, and I think that she likely will be able to do both.
Post # 7
After the events and wedding you will forget that this was even an “issue.” Don’t stress over somone else’s life.
Post # 8
This baby won’t be an issue. Let the mom worry about things like babysitting, what she can do at the bachelorette party, and so forth. It’ll work out. Just be excited for your wedding and excited for your new niece or nephew.
Post # 9
I have to ask. Is “pregnasnowing” a typo or a word I am not familiar with?
OP, it’s not like it’s her first child. I would assume she would be as involved with baby as without.
Post # 10
@savealife: Its my stupid iPad auto correcting things that dont need to be 🙂
Thanks for the advice guys. My fMIL made a great point last night about it. I’m honestly not worried about myself… its everyone else! I’m worried about my FSIL not having a good time, or my FMIL &FIL being stuck babysitting. I just need to keep reminding myself that it will be fine and I just need to relax 🙂