- 6 years ago
- Wedding: October 2008
Tomorrow I’m going to two boutiques in the area to try on dresses for the first time. I’m excited but also VERY NERVOUS. I am afraid I’m going to look terrible and I’ll leave feeling dejected because nothign looks right. These are by no means the only two places we’ll be going, but we’re starting with them.
My goal is to have my dress ordered before Christmas, but I’m fearing that I’ll feel so gross and ugly in everything I try, I’ll just want to bury my head in the sand and pretend like I have plenty of time. I have been doing ‘healthy living’ changes the past few months and have lost ~7 pounds, but still have ~15 more to go before June. I am not overweight, but I feel self concious and always have. My mid section is my biggest enemy and I’m always trying to cover myself up. I so badly want to feel pretty but looking at bridal magazines makes me so angry because those girls weight like 10 pounds! I’m also short, so gaining 3 pounds on me may as well be 10. Meanwhile my 5’10 friend can gain 10 and it doesn’t look like ANYTHING.
Anyway, just wanted to vent. I am SO excited and I know I’ll find something, but I just don’t want to settle for something that makes me look “not so fat” instead of getting what i truly love just because I feel self concious in it.
Also, how much ‘breathing room’ do i have so to speak between dress purcahse and fittings? What if, in April when I have a fitting, I’m several (off the rack) dress sizes smaller (which I intend to be). Will they be able to alter it accordingly? Or am I asking for a huge mess?