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Hi Ladies-
I thought I'd start a post for those of us who are trying to conceive after a miscarriage. On the TWW threads and the TTC & Still Going thread, I've noticed that there are quite a few of us who have had miscarriages and now we are back in the saddle TTC again. So I thought it might be nice for us to post here. Plus, for those who have recently gone through a miscarriage (but might not be posting about it), this thread might help!
I got pregnant on Cycle 1 (woo hoo!) and miscarried at 10 weeks. I had to have a D&C. After my D&C, I got my period 4.5 weeks later. I then had to wait one full cycle (4 more weeks). Once that cycle was complete, we could start TTC again in our next cycle.
Our first TTC-Cycle-Post-Miscarriage was in August, but we weren't successful. I chart, and looking back, I ovulated later than I normally do. Very odd since I'm normally very regular.
So it's onto MONTH 7, but only Cycle 2 post miscarriage.
As for how I'm feeling about it... i was nervous to start trying again, but now I am excited!
Ladies... feel free to join... having a MC can be a lonely, lonelyl world, but unfortunately there are MANY women who experience this.
Thank you so much for posting this. It is nice to have a place where we can all come together. I am ready and proud to say that we are ready to start TTC again. Everything went back to normal fairly quickly after my MC and we feel blessed to have the chance to get back into the TTC world. I am currently back to cycle 1 after the MC and we are looking at it as a new beginning. Thank you again to everyone here at the bee for your enormous support and kind words. I hope all of you who unfortunatly had to suffer this loss, will be able to find the support you need to continue on like I did.
GREAT idea! I tried starting one of these a few months ago and it didn't totally pick up! http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/ttc-after-miscarriage
It was eye opening to me to learn how many women experience miscarraiges (especially with first pregnancies). Wb has been a great place for me to turn to for support, even though I have been pretty open with family and friends about what happened. I admire all of the bee's who have had multiple miscarriages or miscarried much later than me and have the strength to jump back into TTC. I'm routing for everyone!
As for me - this is my post-miscarriage alias! I was a frequent poster and had lots of wedding pics up so wanted some privacy during the TTC process, but I'm sure I'll let everyone know who I am eventually. We started TTC in January. I got pregnant on cycle 3 but miscarried almost immediately (and was taken aback at how devastated I was). We had to wait a cycle before trying again (and it was a looong 40 day cycle). Now it's cycle 3 TTC post m/c. Hoping third time is a charm.
How I'm feeling? A little pessimistic. I was pretty upset that cycle 2 was a failure since we had great timing, etc. I'm currently in the TWW again (AF due Saturday 9/17) and have convinced...or have tried to convince myself it's not happening. However, this cycle is the most regular I have had so far (ovulated on day 15/16 as opposed to 19-22...) so hoping that it's a good sign that my cycle is getting regulated.
Not yet thinking about how scared I will be of another m/c if and when we do get pregnant again...
Good luck to everyone here!
@winniewolf: I am super duper rooting for you! I know how hard it is, but everything happens for a reason. I realized that after my mc. It wasn't our time.
Good luck this month and keep us updated :)
** baby dust**
Hi ladies I just want to say how sorry I am for everyone's loss and am glad that we can all support each other as we try to become pregnant again. I too had a miscarriage in March of this year. I got pregnant in January very easily I basically took and OPK got a smiley BDed one time and was pg. Unfortunately at about 9 weeks I had the worst experience with miscarrying and was completely devastated after and couldn't even think about trying again. I took a break from the bee and turned to a site called dailystrength.org which really helped me bc there were so many other women experiencing what I had. I never knew how common mc was until you hear or read about it. I have a daughter already and got pg with her while on the pill and yes I took it everyday at the same time. I am so lucky to have her bc I love her more than anything. I took a little break from TTC until about May and we have been TTC since then with no luck. I have been using OPK's and thought it would be as easy as the first time, but it hasn't been. Each time AF shows I get depressed and feel like a failure, like omg when I had my D&C did they mess something up, is this normal? But I do move on and we are entering the next cycle and I will be in the TWW after tonight. I want to wish everyone good luck and I hope we all get pg super fast :) thank you for starting this thread
We got our BFP in our 2nd month TTC and I miscarried naturally at 5-6 weeks. It was a terrible experience that I wouldn't wish upon anyone. And I am afraid it'll happen again...
For now I am on CD40 after my m/c, we also got the go ahead to try again immediately so I'm still waiting around for either AF or a BFP...I would prefer the latter. I was going to hold off on testing till next Sat, but I think I'll probably test tomorrow morning since I haven't since Sunday.
Anyway, if this isn't our cycle I hope we are able to conceive relatively easily again and that the next time it is a healthy pregnancy.
Thanks ladies, it has been such a help knowing that you have all gone through the same thing. I still get sad at times and it's really a hard thing to talk about with people who haven't gone through it, so I am glad to have my bees :)
Great thread idea! Thank you for starting this and thanks to everyone for sharing <3
I found out I was pregnant in May. It had been my first cycle charting. We BDed the day I was ovulating... and it worked! Later that same month, I had the mc (a little under 5 weeks). I knew it was a possibility, and I wasn't planning on telling many people until after 12 weeks, but when it happened I was totally crushed.
We didn't try in June (per the doctor's recommendation), we tried in July and I got af. We didn't time it correctly in August, so no surprise that I got af then. This month I feel like we timed it pretty well (with the help of an OPK). So, this is cycle 4 post mc, but really this is the 3rd attempt since we didn't get to try in June.
How am I feeling? Hopeful. Hopeful that I'll soon see a BFP and end up with a healthy baby after 9 months. I'm hoping for that for all of us :) Good luck to everyone!
Hey ladies! I'm not currently TTC, but I did miscarry and have a baby after so I thought I'd chime in and wish you all luck! I know how scary it is to TTC after losing a baby, and then the whole process of being pregnant is also crazy scary b/c you worry all the time!
We got pregnant the second month of trying, but I miscarried at 6 weeks but didn't find out until 12. Right when the doctor gave us the OK to start trying again, we got preggo first try. When I was 6 weeks I had some bleeding which really freaked me out, but it was just a bubble in my placenta and I currently have a beautiful, healthy 7 1/2 week old baby girl.
Wishing you all healthy baby thoughts!
Hey ladies! I'm not currently TTC, but I did miscarry and have a baby after so I thought I'd chime in and wish you all luck! I know how scary it is to TTC after losing a baby, and then the whole process of being pregnant is also crazy scary b/c you worry all the time!
We got pregnant the second month of trying, but I miscarried at 6 weeks but didn't find out until 12. Right when the doctor gave us the OK to start trying again, we got preggo first try. When I was 6 weeks I had some bleeding which really freaked me out, but it was just a bubble in my placenta and I currently have a beautiful, healthy 7 1/2 week old baby girl.
Wishing you all healthy baby thoughts!
We're definitely not ready to even think to hard about TTC again yet, but I'm really glad this thread is here.
I am glad this thread is here. I'm currently in the TWW and going insane. I got pregnant 2 times and miscarried. The first I was still on bc and was not attempting to try and the 2nd time was the first attempt and my first month off of bc. We were using other protection, but again I ended up pregnant. Both miscarriages caused me great devistation. I was farther along and had seen an ultrasound and heard a heartbeat. That loss was truly devistating. I still cry about it and have a tough time talking about it face to face with people without crying.
Now that we're ready mentally and physically it's been tough to get pregnant. My cycles are all over the place since the mc and it makes it difficult to figure out ovulation. I'm hoping this is my month, but if not I know there will be another one to follow :)
Good luck to everyone!
I'm really thankful for this thread!!! I'm having such a hard day today. One of my best friends called last night to tell me she's pregnant. They're due 2 weeks after we would have been due if it wasn't for the MC and that really hit me hard. I'm so happy for them but I'm almost overwhelmingly sad for myself. I feel like such a bad friend. We go to a weekly bible study with them, it's tonight and she said that they're going to announce it to everyone. I'm really just trying to psych myself up today because I know it'll be a tough night but I'm just ending up throwing myself a pity party over here...
@Running Elley: Oh no! That is terrible news! (I mean of course it's wonderful news, but given the circumstances, from your perspective, things are a little different!)
Luckily your hubby will be there for support when she makes the announcement. And worst case scenario, skip out on the bible study week...Say you've got a migraine or something. If you are feeling too down about this, I don't think you should force yourself to go. Maybe just have a quiet dinner at home with your DH.
Up to you, but either way, I totally feel for you! The times I feel saddest is when I think 'I would be this far along' or by next April I would have had a baby... Now with your friend you'll have a constant reminder of that. Maybe if she's a really close friend you can tell her what happened to you so she understands if you are a little distant at times.
Sorry I'm not more helpful...I'm sorry you have to go through this.
We started ttc right after our wedding last April and got pregnant in June. I miscarried in July/August and it was very traumatic. Lasted 4 weeks and eventually I had to have a d&c. We've been trying ever since with various fertility treatments and our only hope now is IVF. We are starting the IVF process very soon. I'm so hopeful that we finally after 14 months can get pregnant again and have a baby!! There isn't a week that goes by that I don't think of the miscarriage and what could have been. I'm so sorry for all of your losses and wish you lots and lots of baby dust!!
@Running Elley: I totally get this feeling. I have friends who are pregnant and I feel the same way sometimes. It's not that I'm jealous, but it makes me sad that we aren't going through it together like I thought we would be. Or that my child won't be the same age or whatever. I just try to stay positive and hope that I am next!
Hello everyone.
My husband & I got pregnant after trying for 4 months. (Exciting to know I got pregnant so fast.) But I had a miscarriage naturally at 9 weeks. We was heartbroken to say the least. :( I have diabetes. Its a struggle everyday. I let it go after the miscarriage & ignored it. In doing so my health has been going down hill. I recently started taking care of myself & it feels WONDEFUL! My sugar has to be in control for atleast 5-6 months before we can start TTC again. We are thinking about waiting a little longer than that. But soon enough that I hope I can join this thread & learn from other peoples stories.
Thanks so much for posting this!
Questions I have-- What suplpements, ect are you ladies that are TTC or going to start TTC taking? :-)
DH and I recently miscarried. I didnt know I was pregnant until the miscarriage. It was about 6 or 7 weeks in.
We are not TTC, as we were not really TTC in the first place lol
Just wanted to thank everyone for posting. My mom never miscarried and my sister has a 1yo so neither of them understand, so its just nice to see i'm not the only one.
Thank you!
@running - so sorry you are having a bad day. I think it's natural to feel waves of sadness about your loss. I was SO sad for a few weeks, then was OK for about a month. Then a friend announced her pregnancy and was due the same day I would have been due (end of December). I was crushed. Totally happy for her, but I got sad about the miscarriage all over again. All of my friends have newborns at the moment (except the one who is due in December) and it was tough to visit everyone right after they gave birth. I just tried to focus on my happiness for them and then allowed myself to be silently sad for me.
It will get better with each passing week and month...I promise! I agree with pp not to push yourself too hard or beat yourself up if you need to bow out tonight. You need to do what's right for you.
@Running Elley: Oh sweetie, you are not a bad friend! Those feelings are completely natural!!!! Literally everyone I knew was pregnant when I MC. :( It was REALLY hard seeing everyone post about it on facebook or talk about it, ect. That is all I would EVER see when I got online. Baby/pregnancy post, one right after the other. I am truly happy for them but was truly sad for myself. Let the feelings run their corse. (((HUGS!))) Good luck tonight at Bible study. Let us know how everything went.
@mwitter80:That's EXACTLY how I feel! I've been trying to think of some positives too. Like what I'm focusing on right now is that when I get pregnant (hopefully this month!) I'll have someone who I can talk to and is going through the same things. I'll be able to see her baby and learn from her experiences.
@winniewolf:I go through waves too. Like where I'm feeling okay and positive about TTC and then something will just hit me and wham! I'm sad again.
@Mrs.Estep:Thanks for the reassurance!
Anways....sorry to threadjack!! Has anyone done any counseling? Sometimes I think that may be a really good idea for me. I'm good at putting on a happy face with most people/in most situations but DH can see how I'm feeling and he thinks it may be a good idea too. Does anyone have any experience with that?
@Running Elley: I have done counseling. I started to become depressed and it was all focused around the miscarriage. I specificly sought out a grief counselor. It was one of the best choices I ever made. They were able to help me gain closure. I think one of the hardest parts is that it's not talked about. There is some type of shame around it or something that keeps people quiet. If you would have delivered a still born it would have received a funeral, it would have been discussed, but the fact that it was an early loss in our society makes it somehow less important, therefore it's difficult to gain closure. I highly recommend it as it helped me so much.
Hi everyone :) can i just say it sucks that we all have to be here, but im so glad we have support here with each other :) we got pregnant the 2nd month of trying. Everything was going great until we went for our first routine ultrasound at 9 weeks. i had a missed miscarriage, where the baby died 2 weeks beforehand (at around 7 weeks) but my body didnt pick up on it (my body still thought i was pregnant, my uterus was measuring for a pregancy of 9 weeks) and i still had my pregancy symptoms and nothing to warn me something was wrong. it was absolutely tramatizing to find out that way, we were both SO excited for the ultrasound expecting to see our baby adn then to find out he died, was horrible. Had a D&E 2 days later. i got my period back 4 weeks after that and we are just starting to ttc and im scared. really scared.
anyone else worried about their cycle post miscarriage? im using a fertility monitor (i did with my first pregancy also) and i just hope things will be normal like before.
Also did anyone have any chromosome/genetic testing done on their baby? did they ever find out what happened (if they could tell)? Were still waiting on the results.
@stargal34:Hi! I agree that it's so horrible to be here but everyone has been so great :) I'm just finishing up my first AF since the MC and my last "cycle" was so wonky that I’m really worried about this one! Last cycle I just kept thinking that if I could only get through that first one my next one would just magically be normal but I'm started to get really scared that that won't be the case. We have OPKs and I've been temping so we're going to give it our best shot!
Since my MC started naturally we didn't have the chance to have testing done but I really wish that we could have. I'm really concerned that we lost the baby because of my hormonal imbalance. If we did then it's likely that we may have to go through it again. I wish we could have had the testing done so we'd know.
@Running Elley: You are def. not a bad friend....it is very hard to see other people you know pg when you should be also. After my mc I had to go to work everyday and watch 2 of my employees have growing pg's and felt horrible inside wondering why me and not them. My baby would have been due in just a few weeks and seeing or hearing about others with the same dates is really hard to swallow. So please don't feel bad.
@stargal34: Hi! I am extremely terrified when/if I do become pg again, I don't think there is anyone that has had a mc and gotten pg again not be scared of the possibility of going through that loss again. Please know you are not alone. I did have genetic testing done after my mc and the Dr. did say that it was a chromosomal problem that wouldn't allow the baby to grow after a certain point. Mind you I also had genetic testing done when when I was pg with my daughter and everything was fine with me, but even if your genes are perfectly fine there is the possibility that when the sperm and egg meet that the chromosomes aren't equal. He said this is the #1 reason for early mc. I hope this helps a little and I am thankful in a way that my body was able to recognize that there was something wrong.
I'm also glad this thread is here for us! I tried typing this out yesterday, but WB went haywire on me! We got pregnant on cycle 8 after coming off BC. It was a long road and we were thrilled. Of course, we were devastated when we found out that I had a missed miscarriage. I had my D&C in June, and this might be TMI, but I bled for a full month and a half. It was awful. My next AF after that was in August, and we just started our first month of TTC. I'm due for AF in a week or two, so we'll see, but I'm not very optimistic this time around. I'm just trying to focus on getting back to normal.
For those who were talking about feeling down on themselves and trying to be happy for others who are pregnant, I know exactly what you mean. I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone. In my 15 person department, 4 women are pregnant. That doesn't count the 3 additional women on my floor who are pregnant, or the 2 separate vendors I work with who are pregnant. That makes 9 pregnant women who I work with on a daily basis. I see them all. the. time. And I get sadder and sadder as more people announce to me that they're pregnant. I want to be happy for them, I really do...but I feel like I'm being punished for miscarrying. It's so frustrating! So I'm so glad that I have this community to turn to when I'm having a bad day.
So I have a ton of pg symptoms. I'm terrified. I can't bring myself to test. At first I thought it was because BFN's send me for an emotional tailspin, but this time I really think I might be pg and the thought of it kind of scares me. I am putting off testing in fear of actually being pregnant and the chance of going through another loss. I feel like it would be easier just to ignore the pg for awhile. I probably sound insane.
@2PeasinaPod: I can't believe that you bled for that long! That must have been awful. I'm glad to hear your back TTC though.
@mwitter80:You don't sound insane at all!! The week before last when I was late and testing I was terrified. I wanted to get a BFP but I was so scared of it too! Just know that no matter what we're all rooting for you :)
Update: We went to bible study last night and it went a lot better than I thought! It was nice to hear about their excitement and see ultrasound pictures. I think what also helped a lot is that one of our other friends pulled me aside and asked how I was (she knows about the MC too) and was really supportive about it. Sometimes it's just nice to know that someone else cares.
@mwitter - i can only imagine how you're feeling! but, it seems very logical to me. i haven't been through nearly as much as you and the thought of another miscarriage is completely terrifying.
@running - glad to hear it went better than you expected!
@mrsestep - welcome : ) i just take target brand prenatals at this point.
@stargal - welcome back to the hive! how you are feeling a little better! my cycles were off after the m/c (and frankly were off before too b/c i hadn't been off birth control that long). i had a 40 day cycle, then 34, then 31 and this month am on track (i think) for a 28 day cycle. it may take some time, but your body should eventually regulate.
@2peas - welcome to the thread and glad to see you back : )
i have a serious case of the debbie downers today. 11DPO and just feeling like it didn't happen again...and feel like i can't imagine it ever happening again. so many women conceive within the first few cycles after their m/c. why not me? can't i catch a break? i was going to wait til AF due (Saturday) to test, but honestly i'm already feeling bummed out so might as well test tomorrow.
@Mrs.Estep:Oh I forgot to answer your supplements question! I'm taking Target brand gummy prenatals. My doctor also suggested that I add B6, 200 mg twice a day, and mucinex tablets twice a day from the start of AF to 3 DPO. This'll be my first month trying that and I didn't start taking them until today (CD7) so we'll see how it works!
@winniewolf:I'm sorry that you're feeling so down today! I think all of us have days when we feel that way. I know that doesn't make it better but just know that you aren't alone.
@mwitter80:She said that the safest pregnancies occur when there are good mucus counts. In the past I've only had 1 or at the most 2 days of peak type mucus (clear, pretty stretchy…basically EWCM). My doctor has worked with me and my charts because of my PCOS since I was 16 and she doesn't think that I have enough of the really good mucus. She mentioned that at least a few days is best and the mucinex is supposed to help that.
@Running Elley: I googled it. Interesting I never knew that!
@running - I have been using mucinex the past few cycles and it seems to help with the EWCM. Though I have started taking it just before my fertile period. My EWCM is NOTHING like it was when I went off the pill for a bit approx. 6 years ago (when I was 25) though I still have some now.
@mwitter80:I had heard of it but I wasn't planning on doing it until she told me to lol. I used to not get any EWCM at all. I'd have CM but it would never get to that really good point. Just since like April I've been getting some EWCM. I was so excited that I got any at all (usually just 1 or 2 instances) I didn't think about trying to add more. Hopefully it'll help this cycle.
@winniewolf:I'm glad to hear that it's been helping! Did you get any EWCM before?
I had a little bit, but not a lot. Now, I'm getting 5-6 days of it and it seems more copious. TMI, but when I went off the pill at age 25 I would get like blobs of it. Now, just a little here and there but definitely improved with mucinex. A product of aging, I guess.
I had a miscarriage or ectopic in April. Two weeks later I had emergency surgery due to lot of internal bleeding and had to have a tube removed (which is why we think it might have been an ectopic miscarriage). I guess I'm TTC, but I haven't gottten a period since then... I am extremely frustrated and at this point I'd give anything just to have a cycle. My doctor and I decided that I will be trying acupuncture soon, and then moving on to fertility drugs if needed after trying the acupunture for a couple months. Overall I'm just sad and mad. I feel like I have been robbed of pregnancy bliss. Women all the time say they are amazed at what their bodies can do during pregnany and delivery... well look what mine did... Although most of this post is negative (I guess I'm having a bad day) I will be forevery grateful to my doctors and nurses.
My cycle seems to rev up and then not ovulate, so I do get CM, and I have found that drinking green tea gave me more CM, so you could try that it you want something natural.
@stargal34: Glad to see you're back and doing better :) I'm scared, too about it happening again...But I guess it's just something I'll have to deal with once we get a BFP.
@babymakes3: I'm so sorry! I stress about having an ectopic pregnancy, what a terrible thing to have to go through. The positive side to any miscarriage though is that we were able to conceive in the first place. I'm sure you'll be back to a normal cycle in no time :)
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