Post # 1
I am a BM for my friend in her upcoming wedding. We are going to go dress shopping soon.
Right now we are TTC. Depending how long it takes to get PG, I will either have a few month old baby, or a baby bump (we plan to hold off for one month that puts me due on her wedding day if necessary).
Here is my question: what should I do about dress size? Either way, I am likely to be larger than I am right now. I know I shouldn’t count on the fact of being pregnant, but her wedding is a ways away still so I am very hopefull it will happen between now and then. So if that is the case, I am so confused on how to decide which size dress to order.
We haven’t told anyone that we are TTC, but I’m wondering if I should give her a heads up, maybe I can hold off a little longer before ordering a dress to see what happens. I just didn’t want anyone to know until we were actually pg.
Post # 3
- Wedding: July 2013 - The front lawn of our church
Hmmm… If I were you, I think I would give the bride a heads up and then wait till the last possible time to order the dress.
Post # 4
@Pink Asawa: I would suggest telling the bride. One of my BM is TTC and depending on when it happens she may be in the exact same situation as you. Since that’s the case, I’m holding off dress shopping until much closer to the date of the wedding and have decided to let the BM pick out their own dresses, that way she can hopefully get something that has an empire waist and she’ll feel comfortable in if she is pregnant.
Post # 5
@Pink Asawa: Let the consultant know, they’ll be able to help guide you. My sister was in the same position when we went dress shopping! Also, wait to order your dress as long as possible so you have a better idea.
Post # 6
I am in the same position and it’s really a lose-lose situation. I told the bride about my situation but since we wanted us to order our dresses so early (6 months out) I had to suck it up and order a dress 2 sizes bigger than I normally wear. I don’t like it, but basically I don’t feel like I have any other choice if I want to be in the wedding.
Post # 7
I was in your position last Dec, shopping for my best friends wedding the following Sept. We were actively TTC, and were not telling anyone we were. I chose not to tell the bride that we were trying, knowing that if it happened, I would resolve the dress issue accordingly.
I just ordered my dress the same size I would normally wear. My reasons were as follows:
1. didn’t know how long it would take us to get pregnant
2. didn’t know IF we’d get pregnant … I didn’t want a larger size dress to be a reminder of our failed TTC if we hadnt conceived by then
3. no matter what size you order, you’ll likely need alterations regardless.
We ordered our dresses in Dec, I got pregnant in March and was 30 weeks pregnant at her wedding. Despite the fact the dress had a great shape and allowed for an expanding belly, it still needed about 8″ in legnth added to the front as the bump took up most of the dress making it far too short. Had there been a corset or zipper back (it was just an elastic back) i would have had to had that taken out/replaced. The straps needed to be let out 1.5″ for my growing bust, but other than that – I made it work. All my alterations were about $80.
Everyone shows very differently and i think that just going in with the attitude that you’ll be able to make adjustments and alterations regardless closer to the date, is the best way to go. If the bride is looking for something super form fitting (ie: skin tight top to bottom with no give) it might be something you discuss with her privately about your plans to TTC as this style of dress would be difficult (and likely very expensive) to adapt to a large baby bump.
Just make sure if you decide to tell her, do it in private and not on “her day” of dress shopping 🙂 I’m sure she will be thrilled for you and your DH’s plans of TTC but try not to make it all about finding the “what if i’m pregnant/just had a baby” dress. 🙂 Go with the flow 🙂
My 2 cents, having been a bride with a bridesmaid who was TTC and being a bridesmaid while fairly large and in her third trimester at her best friends wedding 😉
Good luck, and I hope you do get your BFP very soon!!! 🙂
Post # 8
I’m in the same boat as you. My friends wedding is in August – and me and DH are TTC. I didnt tell her, but my dress had to be ordered 2 sizes bigger because of my chest – so I hope I will be okay. Otherwise I will just pay extra to have to altered!
Post # 9
Thanks for the comments everyone.
@StaceyA: Thanks for your perspective. The dress she has in mind is not super tight (from the pic she texted me) so I imagine I could make it work, and worst case scenario I would be willing to order a second dress closer to the date.
Post # 10
I’m in your same exact boat, and I havent said anything. If I DO actually become pregnant, I will personally eat the price and get it altered or buy an entirely new size.
The $150 is worth the cost to keep this private right now– at least until we actually DO become safely pregnant.