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We haven't started but I fully plan on telling her when we do. My sister as well. My sister just told us a month ago she is pregnant but she hadn't told us they were trying. We are so excited for them but selfishly I was sad I didn't know. I feel like I wouldn't have been in quite as big of shock when she told us. But my sister and I are really close as well as with my mom. We talk and text daily.
Also, I don't think I could keep it a secret. :)
There's no way in hades I'll tell my mom when we're TTC. I can just hear it now, "Are you pregnant yet? What about now? Are you today? Maybe tomorrow? What about now?" You get the point. lol
Nope! We will wait until the 2nd trimester (around 13-14 weeks) to tell our families. I'm not interested in everyone commenting on our sex life, why we are choosing to have kids now, or why it's taking so long. (We're not actually TTC yet, but the comments have already started).
heck no! i would never tell my mom that. for me it would almost feel like "hey mom guess what? i'm about to start having LOTS of sex EVERY DAY! whatya think of that?" lol but that's just not something we would discuss, even though she was ecstatic when i told her i was pregnant.
@JsDragonfly: Same. My mom was asking us when she could have grandchildren before we even got engaged. I don't need her to be on my case when we eventually TTC.
DH and I are going to start TTC this fall. We told my mom.... are not telling DH mom.
We knew that my mom would be excited and encouraging....along with my sis.
DH's mom would likely be really negative so we won't be telling her till we get a positive test.
We told our families wihen I got pregnant...unfortunately I miscarried. My sister knew we were TTC and my mom suspected we were.
my sister knows, so by default now everyone knows on my side of the family.
We are about to tell DH family because the questions are never ending about when we are going to start a family.
Every single time they ask it's a painful reminder that it hasn't happened yet. DH and I are going to tell them "yes we are trying, NO it hasn't happened yet. When it does we will tell you, until then no more questions please."
The first two times i was pregnant i had a miscarriage. The first time my mom found out because i was still living at home and she was snooping in my room and found my prenatal vitamins. After that it was allot harder having a miscarriage because she told everyone so they all knew about it. The second time just me and my hubby knew and i am glad because that is no one else's business. And i was able to grieve on my own without the whole family knowing and asking how i feel. So all in all i would keep it a secret until at least the second trimester because you never know what will happen.
Mom knows we want to get started soon, but I am not going to give her any more info than that. If it takes awhile, I don't want her asking us about it and making us feel worse.
NO way in hell! There's just some things that need to be kept private from parents and this is one of them. I couldn't imagine spending a weekend with them and them knowing that we were trying right then and there. May as well have them watch. EWWW!
I told my mother we would be TTC at some point in the future. But I prefaced it by telling her that I was going to tell her something, I was only going to say it once, and I didn't want to be asked about it again. After she acknowledged all of that, I told her we would be trying eventually and I'd tell her more when there was something to tell. The end.
Sounds harsh, I know. But seriously, you've never met my mother. It was required.
Our parents know we are TTC, and that we have been for almost a year.
I am glad we told them because they are really keeping people off of our case.
My mom actually told my extended family that they were not to discuss/hint/question about if I am pregnant, and when we are having kids, and that if she got wind that they were bothering me about it there would be hell to pay (LOL). It is also nice to be able to vent that things are taking a while, etc etc. The support is helpful to me, it would be hard to go through this long of trying without someone other than DH to talk to.
I would never tell anyone. My mom is the type to talk about everything.Mainly how hard it was for her to get pregnant with me.She is very open with "well keep this in mind when you do have kids 10 years from now do this...."or "it helps when you.... wtf mom? so I plan to keep everything on the down low.
ya i told my mom bc were super close and shes not one to ask "are you pregnant yet?" plus just in case we have any problems it will be nice to have someone to talk to who totally understands me besides the hubs.
My mom knows that I'm off birth control. I maybe shouldn't have told her because we went yarn shopping. During that trip, she bought a pattern book and yarn for a baby blanket. I also bought baby yarn for a blanket, but I fell in love with the yarn more than anything.
Interesting question. i'm not married yet, but as soon as we're financially ready, we plan to TTC (within a year if possible). But here's the thing, we'd like to be able to not tell people until after the first trimester, but we drink wine with my parents almost every night. It's going to be incredibly obvious when I stop drinking wine. So they'll at least know when we're TTC, and I doubt that I'll be able to keep it a secret from my mom when we are, so I don't know. i guess I'll just stop drinking when we TTC, and tell them they can't bug me about it, haha.
We're super close, but my DH and I decided we weren't going to tell anyone because it's too much pressure.
No. I didn't want to be asked about it everytime we talked on the phone. My SIL was about the only person (and eventually MIL) who knew though because we both started trying at the same time.
Yes, I told my mom, after we'd been trying for 5 or 6 months. At the time, we thought we might maybe be pregnant (I think we might have had a chemical pregnancy-light positive test before period was due followed by heavier than normal period) and I wanted to tell her, and she was great when it didn't turn out they way we'd hoped.
But she's super laid back, and very nonchalant about it all. She knows we're trying, and she knows I'll tell her when there's something to tell. She hasn't told anyone else, doesn't hound me about it, and hasn't even brought it up unless I have.
@Ms Mini: That's really great to hear about your support system. That's part of us telling my mom... We both know that she would be continually supportive and encouraging. Goodluck and you and your DH continue... hoping that it's sooner than later ((hugs))
No, we will not tell anyone we are "trying". I think it's weird to announce to everyone that you are having lots of sex and your husband is ejaculating inside of you every time! I also don't want questions if things are taking longer than expected. I do not plan on telling either set of parents until we have started the second trimester. My MIL is a blabbermouth and the whole world would know within days.
I told my mom when I got off the pill. We're kind of just NTNT.
I only told my Mom we're TTC because she's coming to visit us and kept asking me to come along with her to travel to all sorts of places. She's traveling pretty far to see me and coming with two of her friends and had to book everything way in advance.
The only way she understood was if I spelled it out for her. I would have waited until I'm actually pregnant to tell her otherwise.
Now she's asking us to come and visit for the holidays and when I tell her I won't know until a week. She's like, "ooh really, why ... you can tell me". *rolls eyes*
We started TTC this month and I haven't told my mom yet... I probably will unless we miraculously get pregnant this month and then I'll have something else to tell her!!!! DH wants to tell his mom though but hasn't yet!
Our mom's are very low-key and laid back though they won't really interfere!
My mom knew that I had gone off the pill, but I wasn't telling her that we were actively TTC. Not that she didn't figure it out, but I was getting constant questions from her about if I had gone off the pill yet. I told her to shut her up. And I said that she wasn't allowed to ask a darn thing until I told her I was pregnant. She would have driven me batty.
I'll probably end up telling my mom, but I may wait until after we've been trying unsuccessfully for 5-6 months (I hope that doesn't happen, but if it does ....). I think my mom would be a really good support system for me if we are having difficulties.
Me and both of my siblings were all fertility drug babies so my mom understands what it feels like to have difficulty concieving. Because of that, I know she won't be the type to constantly ask if we're pregnant yet she would be a valuable source of knowledge and experience if that is a road that DH and I have to travel down too.
I won't!...She will bug meee every day...so I'd rather tell her I'm NOT TTC and give her and my family a nice surprise.
I wanted to add that I won't be telling ANYONE..
I don't think I will. My mom is very laid back and hands-off, but both my mom and sister were the type of women who got pregnant on the first try every single time, and if I don't have that type of luck, I don't really want to discuss it until I'm ready to do so!
We have casually mentioned to both families about our general timeline for children, but they know we're up in the air about it, so I don't think anybody will start questioning us immediately.
I don't think I will. My mom is very laid back and hands-off, but both my mom and sister were the type of women who got pregnant on the first try every single time, and if I don't have that type of luck, I don't really want to discuss it until I'm ready to do so!
We have casually mentioned to both families about our general timeline for children, but they know we're up in the air about it, so I don't think anybody will start questioning us immediately.
we aren't trying yet, but i'm not sure if i will....i think maybe not though, and then i won't tell her until the end of the first trimester that we're expecting. lately she's been telling me all about my cousin's wife who has been trying and has had 2 miscarriages even though i don't think she's supposed to know or to tell anyone (her sister must have told her in confidence and then she told me...). i mean, i completely trust my mom, and she probably wouldn't say anything...but she shouldn't be talking about my cousin either, and i really wouldn't want her to be telling people before i was ready to be more public about it. she has a few friends and her sister that she's really close to and she might not think it's bad to talk to them before i want her to
@finnaroo: I'm in a similar boat. Love my mom and MIL, but man do they have big mouths. It's not that they're trying to be gossips, but everything just pours out of them without any thought. I can guarantee that if I told either one, within 24 hours both sides of both famillies would know.
They only person I feel like I should tell is my sister, and I haven't really decided if I'll tell her yet. She's older than me, in the middle of a divorce, and has no children, thought she wants a few. I don't want to make her feel bad.
I'll probably just wait to tell them all once when I am pregnant and hear a heartbeat. But if we can wait until the 2nd trimester, that would probably be better.
There is no way that I will tell my mom until I'm in my 2nd trimester. First of all, she can NOT keep a secret, so everyone and their mom would know within about two minutes. Also, my mom has mentioned before that it was incredibly easy for her to get pregnant. All she had to do was think baby and one magically appeared in her belly. If it does take us a while to get pregnant, I don't want her on our case, and I don't want to hear all of her stories about how it took her like 30 seconds to conceive.
I told my mom that we were planning to start trying right after the wedding and not wait and her response was, "well, you're not 20." We're in our early thirties. Thanks.
MIL did a little happy dance when DH told her. But my mom already has grandchildren whereas MIL doesn't.
Haha hell to the no! I just got off BC but don't plan on telling my mom. She would probably send me a thousand Asian home-brewed remedies for conception. Although, she and my dad are planning to come stay with us for a couple weeks this summer - maybe I should tell her so they won't stay too long and get in the way of the baby-making! ;)
We've been married two months and people are already constantly asking for updates on my uterus. If anybody knew when we would be TTC, I'm sure it would only get worse. I can just hear my mom ask about it every day.
Also, MIL used to work in healthcare and gave me advice on prenatal vitamins long before we were even engaged. If we were TTC and she knew, I would probably get comments on everything I ate/drank/did/should do.
i have a really close relationship with my mom we talk almost daily - i've already started talking to her about it even though we aren't TTC yet - maybe this time next year - but she will be one of the first people to know, her and my sister - i cant keep good news like that to myself. besides my husband, they are who i go to with any sort of news.
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