Post # 1
Here is my situation bees, I’m trying to summarize but apologize it is still a bit long:
I have been with my company for about 5 years and over the last few months decided I am ready to make a move. I want to work closer to home and with a company I can grow with and be there long term. My opportunities for growth where I currently am are limited and I have gone as far as I can. However, the company that I work for is great, I enjoy the job, have a decent salary/benefits etc. I’m just ready for a change.
Darling Husband and I have also talked about TTC and he really wants to try for a summer baby, which means either TTC over the next few months for a summer 2014 baby, or wait a year and try for a summer 2015 baby. Sometimes I’m scared to think of starting now, as we have been married less than 1 year and I always imagined us being married longer before TTC. BUT other times I think waiting until summer 2015 for a baby seems so far away. I’m 27 and pictured having children around this age.
If I get a new job now, I feel like I should work there for a few months before TTC to ensure I am off probabtion, qualify for all benefits, and build relationships with my co-workers, which would inevitably mean waiting about a year (summer baby).
However, in the last 2 months I have applied to about 8 jobs, and have not heard back from any of them. (totally discouraging!). We have contemplated starting to TTC next month if I still don’t hear back from any employers this month, and looking for a new job after my mat leave is over (I’m in canada so I will have 1 year after baby comes and would start looking for a new job in 2015).
I am worried that it will be even harder to find a new job after mat leave ends and I will have been out of the working world for 1 year. But if we put of TTC in the hopes of me getting a new job by the end of the year, and I don’t, I will feel like a failure or like we wasted time when we should have just TTC.
I just don’t know what to do, or what is the smartest decision. Thanks for reading and all advice is appreciated!
Post # 3
I was in a similar situation. I have a good job I enjoy with good benefits, and it would be a really compatible position with TTC and babyhood.
However, I found out I was pregnant and was offered my dream job the same week. I’ll already be 10 weeks when I start. I won’t qualify for FMLA (so I’ll only get 6 weeks off, plus whatever sick/vacation time I take), but maternity leave is short-term and my career is long-term. It will be longer hours, and a much farther commute, but my husband supports the decision and will compensate. (It also helps that grandparents live nearby.)
Every day I get nervous that I’m not making the right choice, but it comes down to this for me: I don’t even have the baby yet, and I am already considering holding myself back from the career I want. Imagine how tough it’ll be to take risks when little one is actually here.
So, I’m going to make it it work.
I hope you make a decision you and your husband can feel good about for both you and future babies! Remember that you can always interview and turn down a position that isn’t the perfect fit for you and your family.
Post # 4
The reason that I say TTC and then find a new job after maternity leave is up…. is because, you know you will have your benefits, you won’t have to “explain” to anyone about being pregnant, and loving your job (even if you are getting bored of it) will be a lot easier on the pregnant you, than a new job with new people, new rules, etc.
That’s just me though! I’d want to be non-stressed while I’m cooking future baby! 🙂
Post # 5
It seems pretty straightforward to me. You have four good reasons to wait.
1.) You aren’t totally gung-ho on having a child just yet.
2.) You are still young and have lot of quality baby-making time left.
3.) You want a new job and to get settled in it.
4.) An additional year or two of waiting is not all that long.
Job searches can be discouraging. If you aren’t having much luck revamp your resume, network like crazy, and follow-up when you don’t hear back (unless it is one of those fields where following up is silly because you don’t expect to hear back — like academics).
Post # 6
I disagree with @jackieee:
Yes, maternity leave is temporary. But the baby is not! Choosing a job that has a farther commute, longer work hours, etc…doesn’t seem to me like a great plan with a baby coming. BUT everyone is different and you’ll get lots of varying opinions about this.
I did the exact opposite. I left a job that had better advancement potential, higher pay, but much longer hours and worse commute in order to be closer to and spend more time with my first born. Was it a sacrifice? Of course! But that’s sometimes is what being a parent is about. It’s like marriage. Whenever you factor in other people, sometimes the choices are all in tune with each other, sometimes they aren’t. And when they aren’t, you gotta make the choice that is better in the long run.
I vote for TTC now and get a new job later.
Post # 7
@Bazingau: Good points also! I certainly went back and forth between this viewpoint. Definitely things the OP needs to consider.
Post # 8
Thanks for the input so far, anyone else have any thoughts/advice/similar experience to share?