Weddingbee boards

Is anyone familiar with the mandarin collar style tuxedos?

My FI is very much wanting to go that route and I am willing to bend to his desires, it is his wedding too (LOL).  I've gotten beyond the whole, "there's no lapel for the boutineere (sp?)" but what about ties?

I'm having a hard time finding GOOD pics of those jackets with ties and without.  Just today, after googling, I found out you can do both.  I wanted him in a white tie and white vest to match me.  He's anti-tie, but willing to wear one just for me.  After I found out that there was a special shirt that could be worn with it, with no tie, I thought that would also fix my problem of matching the guys ties to the ladies dresses.

My question: My girls are in aubergine (think, eggplant purple) dresses - different styles, possibly different materials due to possible pregnancies and I have 3 ladies of honor. Okay, finally the question.  Can the groomsmen wear silver ties and vests under their mandarin collared jackets or should I REALLY try to find a matching tie and vest to the dresses?  Or should I go without ties and vests all together and just do mandarin collared shirts?

Okay, one last question, does my brother/escort have to wear a matching tuxedo or can his be of a different style, example with a shawl collar and bowtie?

Thanks, ladies!!