Post # 1
Hi everyone. Little vent here! I have two little girl cousin’s that are exactly the same age. (Both 5) Our families are generally very close. Well I asked my one little cousin two month’s ago to be the flower girl in my wedding and my aunt was THRILLED!
However, last week my grandparents were telling me that I should ask my other little cousin to be apart of our wedding also. They thought it would be very nice of me, because they don’t want her to feel left out. (The two little girls are best friends)
So, this past weekend we had a family party and I decided to ask my other little cousin to be apart of the wedding too. Well I just found out that my aunt is very upset that I asked my other cousin. She says that it makes it a lot less special for her daughter.
I have always been a people pleaser and like to make everyone happy (I know that’s impossible). But now I feel really bad. I texted her and apologized and she responded with, “it’s fine, I just think it makes it a lot less special for her now. I’ll get over it”
Did I do the wrong thing by asking my other cousin too?
Post # 3
Um no I think you did the right thing. It’s not your Aunt’s or your little cousin’s day it’s yours. Just think how bad the other little girl may have felt for being left out. Your Aunt is being a little selfish about her kid if she cannot be happy for both girls being able to be a part of the wedding. I wouldn’t give it another thought.
Post # 4
A grown up mother should be able to get over any disappointment on her daughter’s behalf and understand the possible disappointment of her niece. DH has 3 nieces, I’ve none, so all 3 were flower girls and their mothers were delighted for all of them.
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2012 - Mother of the Bride's residence
I’m finding it more and more common to have more than one flower girl! We’re having two, because we have two nieces. Both sets of parents were cool with it.
Post # 6
Thanks everyone! I think it’ll be better for everyone, in the big scheme of things. Both of my cousins will be involved on that special day 🙂 I just wish my aunt didn’t feel that way. I wish she thought it was still special for her.
Post # 7
I’m having two flower girls and I’ve been in weddings with up to five flower girls. It seems like it will still be special for both cousins.
Post # 8
I think your aunt is being quite unreasonable. Her daughter isn’t going to find it any more or less special with a partner. In fact, it might be better for her. She won’t feel as shy maybe, and they can both bond over their dresses. Two flower girls to me means twice the cuteness.
Women are so silly sometimes. Honestly, no offense to your aunt, but this is such a first world problem. She needs to get over her ego towards her special snowflake child, lol. Every child should feel special!
Post # 9
we had 3 flower girls at our wedding. I think your aunt is being selfish, I dont see how it is any less special for her daughter just because you decided to have 2 flower girls
Post # 10
We would have done 2 flower girls however BIL has 2 daughters and his GF has 1. We didnt feel comfortable with his gfs daughter being in there as well becasue of the small wedding so we picked the smallest and thats it. At the same age I think its so cute to have the 2 best friends.
Post # 11
I was orginally going to do two as well before my sister was unable to fly my one niece out. I think you were being super fair and sweet to include both! Your aunt is a little unrealistic.
Post # 11
Bumping up this thread!
Just wondering what past brides have done when there are 2 flower girls walking together. Do you think it will look okay for each flower girl to hold the same flower basket with 1 hand? Or can the older 1 hold the flower basket whilst the younger girl holds something else thats the same purple colour?
Post # 12
ForeverBlessed: Good Lord, your Aunt sounds like a nut case. If she thinks her daughter being 1 of 2 flower girls is an earth-shaking disappointment, it doesn’t bode well for that child’s future. I have a crazy SIL, who prompted her daughter to ask multiple brides, if she could be their flower girl. Like an all-out campaign, because having the words “flower girl” on your resume is some end-all/be-all event, in a girl’s life. She’s now 14.5 and has never been in a bridal party … oh well!
Post # 13
- Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast
Less special? What? She’s young. She will probably be much more willing to walk down the aisle with her cousin/friend than alone. Walking down the aisle alone is scary for kids!!! I’m having 2 flower girls and they’ll walk together.
Post # 14
I didn’t know that it was typical to only have one, I’ve been to weddings with 1, 2, or even 3 different flower girls. When I was a flower girl as a kid, it was both my sister and I and I’ll have two in my own (also sisters) as well as two ring bearers.