Post # 1
Hello all, I need some advice –thinking about all the options is making me go a bit dizzy.
– one wedding ceremony with dinner reception for 150 on the east coast (where fiance and I met, his family and our friends reside) – 150 is max venue can fit. This is on Sunday.
– a second dinner reception for 300 on the west coast (where my family is and lots lots of my family friends and relatives, also where I grew up) venue can accomodate up to 400. This is on the following Saturday.
How should I do my invitations?
1. Should I send one invite that lists all these events. In my head, I think it saves money and paper and its easier to do for me. I have about 10% of guests from overseas and I would like them to have a choice to go to either. I have about 10% of guests (close family and friends) who want to go to both. But for the rest of the guests, can I assume people will understand that they’re invited to the one closest to them? Since I can’t have everyone go to both!
2. Or should I make three different invitations? One for the east coast one, one for the west coast one, and one for both events??
3. I’m making my STDs right now, should I include both events on the STD- gauge a response of who can make which event (with my wedding website) and then with my formal invitations – send the appropriate invitation to the one they can go to…
What have people done in the past?
Which one would you prefer as a guest?
Post # 3
If you list both events, I would assume that I’m invited to both.
Post # 4
I wouldn’t make the same invites and hope people would assume they only go to one. people will come if they’re invited. maybe not all,but they will and you don’t want to run into the problem of too many guests for both weddings. anyway, i would suggest doing different invitations.
1. Add an additional insert that informs them about the other event It doesn’t have to be as large as the invitation – just an insert that informs them about the event and how to rsvp.
2. So that means you only end up making 2 invitations instead of 3 – one for the east coast and one for the westcoast. you just also have a smaller insert that goes with it if they’re invited to both.
3. As for the STD – i’m also having 2 weddings. Our STDs were cheap though so we actually sent them two STDs in one envelope. They were the exact same STD, but with different dates.
Hope this helps.
Post # 5
Have you thought about doing a pocket fold invite and then listing off the items on different cards "West Cost Reception" "East Coast Reception" (kinda sounds like a rapper war…lol) On each card at the top have a simple statement that says,
"We are having 2 recpetions to share this day with all our family and friends across the country, we hope you can can find one that suits your schedule best and celebrate with us"
Or something better worded…..
My second thought is if you put it all on one insert – people might get confused. But if you don’t mind clarifying in e-mails and conversation that might not be a bad thing. I’d go crazy myself…lol.
I think that making sure that people know they arn’t invited to both (you never know someone may want to go to both) is the most importanat thing, like Yach said – I’d feel invited to both if they were in there.
With one only allowing 150 people, you don’t want to turn guests away if you get more then that who want to come to it. I’d make the hard decision to pick, and maybe give the overseas the opportunity to [ick between both it an insert with both in it if thre’s not to many of them…..
Post # 6
3 separate would be proper with 3 separate save the dates.
3. bicoastal invitees.
Post # 7
It doesn’t sound to me like you can take the chance that a lot of people will show up unplanned at the first reception, right? You have limited space. Do you also have limited space for the wedding? If so, I would think that you need separate invitations. For the east coast folks, an invite to the ceremony and the east coast reception. For the west coast folks, an invitation to the west coast reception. If you include an invitation to the wedding, people actually may travel. And for your international friends, the east coast invitation, with a separate reception card giving place and time for the west coast reception.
I would think that anything else would cause enough confusion that you will get a lot of phone calls, and have to tell this story so many times that you get pretty tired of it.
The "rule" on STDs, everywhere I have read, is that you really need to send an invitation to everyone who gets an STD. The STD is not meant to be a sorting tool to let you save money and postage on invitations. Generally the STDs I have seen do not actually have an RSVP, although it sounds like maybe yours do? We are not expecting people to RSVP to our STDs.