Weddingbee boards

WARNING: Long post ahead. But much help is needed, so read on!

I found out yesterday that my time as a Miss Bee may be drastically shortened.

My FI has had his master's for a year now and can't find a job as a teacher at a high school or college because of the economy, teacher layoffs, etc. He heard from a friend of his that Louisiana is hiring people with master's degrees and paying them a good deal of money (and allowing them to teach the way they want to teach...this is good for my maverick of a FI, haha!). It sounds like a really good opportunity.

So he talked to me about it and we decided to go for it. The kicker is...I want to be married to him before we go. The thing is, instead of our peaceful planning for a wedding next March, we'd have to bump the date up to August, or even late July. ACK! We have the money for it, that's not the issue- it's the timing.

So I have two options.

Option #1- Move everything up and have our grand wedding in August. There are two serious problems with this idea though...first, that my side of the family lives across the country and the wedding will be in Orlando (because ALL of his family lives there and his family is much bigger than mine), so that would severely limit the amount of time my side of the family has to save for plane tickets, hotels, etc. Second, we wouldn't even know if he got the job until around June or even early July, so that is DEFINITELY not enough time for us to plan the kind of wedding we want, not to mention send out invites and give people time to plan.

Option #2- Have a quiet wedding with our immediate families in August. It would be very informal and we'd just have a nice dinner afterwards. I do desperately want a "real" wedding like we've been planning, though.

Here's my etiquette-related question. If I go for option #2, can I still have a wedding and reception in March? I don't just want a reception...I want to have a wedding with the lovely dress, the walk down the aisle, and for my sisters and cousin to be my bridesmaids- I want to get married in front of ALL of our family and make those promises to my FI. Could I possibly send out some kind of Save-the-Date that says that we got married, but we'd like to make those vows in front of everyone in March?

I'm just not sure how to word that exactly. I don't want it to be graceless or offensive! I just need a bit of hive help on how to tackle this issue.

believe me I know what you are struggling with.  Me and my fiance have had to cancel our date due to health issues.  I want more than anything to be married to him and he does to me, but we want that special day in front of the family and friends:)  We have thought about just having a small wedding and then doing a big one when we can afford it, but most peoples reaction to that idea was you are already married so why bother.  I really am sorry I can't offer you some great advice on this cause I am in the same situation in a way:)  Good luck with everything, may it all be blessed no matter how it happens:)

One of my very good friends was married 2 years ago, in City Hall, with my and one other girl as BMs and 2 guys as GMs/witnesses. She was 24, a sophomore in college(she started late), her fiance was 26. He's a chemical engineer. The reason that they were married so hastily and had such a small, informal wedding was that the FH got a job out in Seatle and my friend wanted to move with him but she wanted to be married before the move. They didn' have the time or the money to have a "real" wedding. Fast foreward to one year later. He has a job that pays a 6 figure salary, she's still studying and working on the side, they saved up enough money to have a gorgeous, amazing wedding. Exactly a year after they were married at City Hall (their 1 year anniversary), they had a church ceremony (she is quite religious and didn't even think they were married until the church ceremony), an amazing reception and a honeymoon. So, I think, having 2 weddings is perfectly fine! I say go for it! Especially since option 1 seems so hectic and stressful.

Sorry for the lengthiness.

i seen something someone wrote on another post and it made me think maybe I should do the two weddings:)  They were going to get married at the courthouse and then have their big wedding the next year.  But anyways she said she felt lucky to get to marry the man of her dreams twice:)  That is a prity awesome way to look at it:)

Thanks for the comments! I want to wait until March for several reasons. I love spring; spring break would be ideal for FI to be out on break to go home and get married where his family lives; it would give us time to organize everything; and it would give my side of the family plenty of time to plan.

Does anyone have any suggestions of how I should phrase the announcement/invitation? I don't want to offend his family by not inviting them all when they all live so close...but if I invite all his family, it'll offend mine because they couldn't be there (regardless of their financial situations- they're not the most reasonable, rational people in the world).

How should I start? Should it be a Save-the-Date? Or should it be more like a wedding announcement?