(Closed) Two weddings! Yay! Or nay…

posted 8 years ago in LGBTQ
  • poll: Should we buy lunch for our peeps after the legal ceremony?
    You gotta feed 'em : (16 votes)
    55 %
    You really don't : (13 votes)
    45 %
  • Post # 3
    7082 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2009

    I don’t think you should have to spring for lunch unless you are specifically making reservations at a sit down restaurant for the group… then they might expect it.  More than likely your friends will offer to spring for you and your partners’ meals.

    Post # 4
    2392 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I would vote for feeding them, but honestly it’s up to you.  If you’re really phrasing it as “we’re going to do this, love for you to join, maybe we’ll hang out in DC too” then it’s probably just fine to have everyone cover their own lunch.  But if it ends up just being a couple of your closest friends or a small, intimate group, then I think treating everyone is a really nice thing to do.

    Basically, I think the people close enough to come with you will understand either way (maybe even want to treat you and your wife to lunch).  But then again, I have never been known as a stickler for etiquette…

    Post # 5
    2588 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I think it depends on the number of people and their expectations whether you should (read: not “have to”), but you are by no means obligated to feed them all TWICE. 😉 If it’s not too expensive, it might be a nice gesture, but if you spread the word that it’s just an extra little trip, they should get that everyone’s going dutch.

    Congrats, btw! Hopefully VA will pull its head out of its ass soon. It’s horrifically unfair.

    Post # 6
    3316 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I would think that lunch could be very informal–the nearest burger joint or pizza place would be fine.  But if they actually come to DC for the ceremony, feeding them something would be nice.

    Given that Virginia still effectively prevents second parent adoptions for same-sex couples, I suspect it is not going to have same-sex marriage any time soon.  Frown

    Post # 7
    166 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I voted to feed them because they are making that special trip to DC to be there and support you. It’s a nice gesture and it may not be expected but I’m sure it’ll be appreciated!


    Post # 8
    581 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m thinking that if you presented them with an invitation, you should feed them.  It certainly doesn’t need to be expensive.  For me, there is something about celebrations and food going hand-in-hand.  Even if this is a second ceremony, a meal would be nice.  May every one of us enjoy marriage on an equal foundation in the not-so-distant future.  It is only just and right.

    Congratulations on your upcoming marriage. I wish you and your Fiance all the best.

    Post # 9
    206 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010 - Heritage Square Museum

    It’s funny b/c I don’t really think you should have to feed everyone twice, but at the same time, if they’re gonna travel to show their support….


    Then maybe a little cheapie lunch wouldn’t be too bad? Something family style, or super casual? Or what about just doing cupcakes/dessert and champagne?



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