ugh bad waiting day

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

@ktcheer09:  awe sending you a huge hug!! sometimes waiting is so tough! I have been finding that everyone is getting engaged on my facebook and it makes it hard! Hopefully your SO comes around 🙂

Post # 4
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

maybe you really need to have a conversation with him to find out if he ever plans to. Let him know how you feel about really wanting to get married and that you want to spend your life with him and ask him how he feels. I waited a very long time too and my fiance just was never ready to until last year. It killed me the whole time but I talked to him about it and he told me he did want to marry me but I would have to wait till he got more situated in life and I did. 

Post # 5
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@ktcheer09:  Ugh, I know how you feel. Someone posted on facebook the other day that their fiance is the best fiance ever (in an attention seeking way). I immediately thought “no, mine is” then I remembered I have a boyfriend, not a fiance. UGH Cry

If your SO doesn’t believe in marriage as you say, do you think that he’ll ever propose? It seems like marriage means a lot to you but not to him. Maybe you should have a discussion about that.

Post # 7
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@ktcheer09:  if you’re bf doesn’t believe in marriage why are you “waiting” for a proposal? Sounds like you need to accept being with him and not getting married or find a man who believes in marriage…

Post # 8
Member
2394 posts
Buzzing bee

@MrsWBS:  

+1 

If he doesn’t believe in legalized marriage “under the government” (eyeroll), then what are you waiting for?

I would say this isn’t a bad waiting day… I would say it’s a good day to look at things clearly and make your OWN plans for YOUR own life. But then I couldn’t stay in a relationship with a guy who says he only believes in marriage “under God, not the government.” 

He’s feeding you a line. Don’t take it!

 

 

Post # 10
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Men that intend to marry you don’t have to hide behind statements like “he don’t want the Government in his business”. Instead, they are prepared to have sensible discussions about marriage even if you don’t necessarily get the answer you want right now. There’s nothing wrong with someone not being ready to get married (me and my DH were in mutual agreement about this until the time was right) but anyone unprepared to tackle the topic sensibly is almost certainly stringing you along.

Right now you aren’t “waiting” for anything all the while he’s not even prepared to consider the idea or give you a sensible answer why.

Post # 11
Member
1207 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@ktcheer09:  that’s a lame excuse that he’s giving! Tell him that you can be married and file your taxes separately Tongue Out

 

Honestly though, I think it might be time for a serious conversation, because he doesn’t seem ready to get married, which sucks!

Post # 12
Member
523 posts
Busy bee

@BelliniChic:  +1

I don’t understand how he can say he believes in marriage but also doesnt really. Is it something that is OK for others but not for him? I would definitely straighten this out before I spent another minute of my time waiting for a proposal. (Honestly, if it were me the second a guy threw the government in as an excuse I’d be gone).

Post # 13
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Yeah, I would also be worried. If he’s against marriage, a proposal isn’t coming!

Post # 14
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee

OP- do not wait for a proposal that isnt coming! When a man tells you who he is… believe him. If youve dated him for a year or two and this is how he feels, then it might be time to tell him you love him but you just dont have aligned visions of the future and you need to end it. 

If you want to be a wife you deserve someone who wants to be a husband! 

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