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No, I don't think you're being insane. Which probably just means I'm looney too. I've been dealing with BM and family drama of my own so I'm probably coming from a hostile place but I agree with your Mother, take the super cool cuzzo and screw the others. They're being DIVAS for no reason! I would be upset too because it is a great idea and they should appreciate it. But you can't please everyone.
I think you've already read my story about ungrateful bratty people...=]
I just vote NOT to have an extra bachelorette party since they're being such wanks about it. It's your damn party, not theirs. Boy, it sure sucks to not be 21, doesn't it?
But i know that doesn't solve the issue of "cooL" bridesmaid. Just go to six flags, have fun (I'm no teenager but hell, rides sound like a good time to me! When do you ever get to do that?! Hardly ever. When you go with kids you're too busy watching them like hawks!).....and just reply back "that's cool, you don't have to come! But you're missing out!" or just...."bummer for you guys".
You definitely should listen to your mom. They're being snooty teenagers.
I don't get it...when i was 19, i thought girls in their 20's were like, awesome. I wanted to be like them! so mature and all that good stuff. You'd think they'd be thrilled to be invited to 'tag along' with their older, cooler cousin, right?! =]
Aw, hotchild, I'm sorry, I remember you looking for ideas to plan a day for them, you put a lot of thought and effort into that!! They are being very rude little brats, in my opinion...At this point, I think if you want to go to SF, then you should bring the other cousin, sister and go and have a good time but it's time to stop catering to the other two...Plan on them walking down the aisle and posing for pictures at the wedding but I think that's all you can expect from them from now on...I'm sorry!
Ok. You've tried. Really hard. You've tried and tried and tried. And they are being AWFUL. Ungrateful. Mean. Selfish. BRATS. Ditch 'em. You've told them the plans, now you go, take your awesome cousin, and if they don't come, their loss. You guys will have a blast! I wanna come!
I don't think you're being insane...I think you're being an incredibly accommodating and gracious bride. You're bending over backwards for your cousins to include them, and every single thing you suggest to them, they shoot down. I think you should take your super cool cousin and your sister and let your other cousins know when and where, and if they don't want to go, it's their loss. You unfortunately can't please everyone, and it sounds like they're going to make a stink over everything you suggest. There isn't much you can do to please them, so just do your thing with your awesome cousin and they'll definitely miss out on a fun day!
Tell them to shove it! You have gone above and beyond to make them feel included and special. I mean, it's YOUR bachelorette party and you stressed about a way to make THEM happy. Obviously they're just spoiled miserable brats who can't be happy. Take your sister and fun cousin and forget about the party poopers. THis is supposed to be a time to surround yourself with fun people who love you and support you and make you happy.
What brats. I wouldn't give them the satisfaction of giving them another party! A bachelorette party is for you, not for them!
I wouldn't even CONSIDER planning anything else around them. What brats!! Go without them - listen to your mom :)
Don't let them see you upset either! People like them feed off misery they cause LOL.
Thanks, ladies. I honestly am just stepping away from the whole thing for a few days. I have gotten so worked up and upset and I have more important things to be concerned with than this ;o)
I think the important thing is you tried to make concessions for the younger girls, which is really awesome. They cannot complain about anything. I agree, take the awesome cousin and your sister and too bad for the lame cousins. I know several people who hate rides and would still go to something like this anyway just to spend the time together.
Don't let those bums bother you!
@brianalaura: My confusion comes from the fact that they went to Six Flags last summer. Obviously they didn't just sit around all day...they went with friends. Which makes me think they're just being disagreeable for the sake of it.
Are you joking?! Well that's just tough now isn't it? If they don't like rides and don't want to go FOR YOU then they can just not go at all! Forget trying to please them bc thats not gonna happen! They are lucky you were as thoughtful as you were trying to plan a fun day for them! You are wayyy to nice! YOu DEF have more important things to do then to play games with them...screw em!
I say take the awesome cousin and whomever else wants to go and enjoy the day. Make sure you take LOTS of pictures and post them everywhere those brats will have an opportunity to see them. You have bent over backwards...if you bend anymore you are going to snap.
You are so not being bratty OR a bridezilla. In fact, you're being super nice attempting to accomodate your cousins who can't attend the other bachelorette party. You're actually doing the Six Flags thing for them.
I agree with your mom. I would ditch them and do what you want with the two other girls.
Shoot, I'd call them out on having gone last year, ha.
Or just send back a quick message, "yeah you guys ARE party poopers! You're missing out!" and leave it like that.
Do not cater to them.
Bratty biotches, lol. I would have KILLED for a cool older cousin when I was that age! My closest cousin was in her 30's....and her daughter is 4 years younger than me =]
you are not INSANE and those teenagers need a good slap in the butt!
what attitudes!?!?! they do NOT deserve a separate event to feel included!
@EJS: I did call them out haha. I haven't heard back yet.
I was like, "Ummm, I'm a little confused about you guys not wanting to go to Six Flags, since you went last year with friends. Did you sit on the bench all day? HotSisterintheCity and I have tried really hard to plan something for you guys and you have hated everything we have suggested. We're not going to force you to go but it's really too bad you don't want to enjoy this day with us."
Good for you.
If they do go...i hope they both get their periods that day and feel crap-tastic, eat midol, and nobody sympathizes for them
HA.
Here's an idea. What about just inviting them to the beginning/dinner portion of your Batchelorette party, and then they get to leave as you continue on for the night? That's really all I've heard of brides/BM's doing when someione in the bridal party is underage. That should be plenty for them to feel 'included'.
Ditto what ejs said lol!
Seriously, they are cows. Go without them, have a blast and worry about more important things than them like having an utterly fabulous time at your other bachelorette.
@smyley: That's a lovely idea, but they live upstate and my bach party is going to be in NYC. So unfortunately that will not work.
Good for you! I remember your last post about the dress & your Aunt, etc. and I think you've already put enough effort into trying to accommodate them. Sounds like they're the type who'll try to steal some of the spotlight during your shower too but don't let them get to you. I say you've extended the olive branch as far as it'll go - I'd only include them when you HAVE to before the wedding. We're here if they pull any crap too. ;)
@hotchild - good on you for calling them out, then! Maybe they thought you wouldn't know they went before. I hope it all works out in the end.
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Background: I have lots of bridesmaids. Maybe this was not the best choice, but whatever, too late now. My sister is MOH, 4 friends from college are BMs, and my three cousins are BMs. My one cousin (15 y/o) is the coolest chick ever and this post is not about her. My other cousins, who are sisters (19 yo and 17 yo) are driving me to be a raging bridezilla.
I've posted before about my total brat of a cousin/bridesmaid who had to be begged for months to tell me what dress she bought. Finally, 20985457 emails/phone calls and 2 months later, we got that issue resolved.
Now onto this disappointment. My sister/friends are planning the "traditional" bachelorette party for me and I am way excited. It's going to a wild partying thing and obviously my cousins can't come. So my sister and I went really out of our way to plan an "extra" bachelorette party so the girls wouldn't feel left out.
I asked suggestions of the hive, and most of these suggestions got shot down by my two unreasonable cousins. Finally, we come up with what we believe is the best idea of all time (ha) which is going to Six Flags for the day, wearing matching t-shirts and such and going out to a fun dinner afterwards. We figure this will be fine since cousins-from-hell went to a different Six Flags last summer, so they must like SF, right? Wrong.
I send out this super-excited email with our plans to my two cousins (awesome cousin has already agreed to go, obvs). This is the email I get back yesterday:
"sorry to be a party pooper but we don't like rides and we don't want to go."
I could have cried. I know I'm in bride-mode and overreacting. I am also a major people pleaser and I really wanted to plan a really special day for them. If I was a teenager and my older cousin offered to take me to Six Flags and dinner and everything, I would have been super-excited!
My mom is telling me just to ditch them for the day and take awesome cousin and my sister. I just feel so disappointed.
Anyway, please feel free to tell me I'm being insane or share your own stories of ungrateful and miserable brats ;o)