Post # 1
I’ve thought of myself as a down to earth gal. “The ring doesnt matter” I told myself. I was always the girl that wanted something other than a diamond. So then why do i feel so dissapointed? I got engaged last weekend. It was beautiful. We went ice skating down chicago and he proposed in front of so many people. But when i saw the ring, my heart dropped. I wanted a sapphire. He knew it. Instead he got me a .45 solitaire. I love him to death, and want to be with him, so why do I care? I see women with big diamonds, and get jealous? I hate myself for feeling this way. I feel like a pitiful brat. I had to tell someone. Thanks for listening. I wish I could go back to the world of no rings. 🙁
Post # 3
So he got a .45 solitaire diamond and you’re disappointed it’s not a sapphire, or he got you a .45 solitaire sapphire and you’re disappointed it’s not bigger? If you wanted a sapphire and he got you something different, I think you should tell him you’re unhappy because he ignored your wishes.
Post # 4
@livliv: I know EXACTLY how you feel!! Ugh. FH and I had decided to spend a small amount of money on our wedding bands (just plain gold rings) and I spent the entire morning looking at diamond bands… especially when we can use the money on so many other things… and I think I only want the diamond band because I’m envious of other rings I see on here.
Maybe you could consider getting a wedding band with sapphires in it? Those are really really gorgeous and look stunning next to larger diamonds since it brings out the sapphire imo!! Are you considering asking him to change the setting or did you want a sapphire as a center stone?
Post # 5
IM a fan of if you dont like it tell him!!
yes he might get his feelings hurt but its YOUR ring that youll wear forever.
i picked my ring and still ended up changing it like four more times.
Post # 6
It’s hard isn’t it? There will always be rings out there that are bigger/more expensive than our own, but you should love it for what it is and because of who gave it to you. Possibly get a sapphire right hand ring later on?
Post # 7
Aaaaaaaaaaand this is why I deliberately picked my ring and watched him buy it. Yeah, sure, I took some of the ‘romance’ out of it. I also realized that men are practical, silly beings, and if I wanted what I wanted, I’d be better off getting it myself. The proposal was all him, and me picking the ring took a lot of stress off of him.
Hope he kept his receipt sweetheart, and if he knew you wanted sapphire he has no right to get angry with you wanting to return it. If anything he should be happy you’re saving him the money!
Post # 8
One thing I’ve found since being on the Bee is that a lot of men really think an engagement ring should only be a diamond! I’d ask him his thought process behind the ring he picked and hear his side of it (the engagement ring symbolizes the commitment you are BOTH…I really believe it reflects him too!) Maybe hearing that will make you love the ring even more!
I like @sheepandbear: ‘s idea of getting sapphires in your band! Super sexy…thinking of one myself for my 2nd band!
Post # 9
I am also confused about what exactly the ring is that you got…
Did you want something different because you thought the ring didnt matter, and that you didnt deserve a diamond…Or you really did want a sapphire (question mark key is not working ugh!)
I felt this way about my dress. It didnt matter, just a dress blah blah So I settled and didnt want to spend money on it. In the end, you know what the dress DOES matter. And I told FI I needed a new dress, and we went and got one.
You need to be happy with your ring, it is something you will wear forever. Dont settle on your ring, be honest with him.
Post # 10
I wanted a sapphire halo. We looked in an unserious way aboout a year ago. He also knew that I love the halo. We don’t make tons of money, so I get it. But he spent a lot on quality vs size. I love that about though. When I asked why he didn’t just shoot for the cheaper sapphire, his response was “I wanted you to have a diamond”. It just feels like he didn”t take the time to get what he already knew I’d like. And now that I do have a diamond, I’m diamond “size” envy. What a rough 1st world this is. lol 🙁
Post # 11
He got me a Blue nile .45 solitaire. Plain setting. We’ve alredy sent it back to have it resized and have the setting changed to a petite pave. I just don’t have the heart to tell him anything else. I feel the worst kind of guilt. Thanks for all the feedback. And brilliant idea on the sapphire band!
Post # 12
Is your fiance open to a future upgrade/reset that incorporates the stone he proposed to you with? I think your diamond would look great in a three stone setting. How about an 8 mm sapphire center with a .5 ct diamond on each side? That would be gorgeous!
For what it’s worth, I believe your e-ring is something you should be 100% happy with. I think you should tell him you’re not satisfied with it sooner rather than later. I’m sure he just wants you to love it. Afterall, you’re going to wear it every day of your life. I honestly don’t think your current ring will ever grow on you because the style is so unlike anything you said you wanted. I think it will always bug you that it’s not what you had your heart set on.
Post # 13
Before you sent it back to change the band, you should have told him you would really love a halo since it was what you had always thought youd get. I mean, you already told him you wanted a pave band, a halo wouldnt have been too crazy.
I am also one for gettin a spphire band. I have a .5 carat solitaire and I adore it! Dont let size or anything get to you. We all get ring envy, I know I do. But at the end of the day, a diamond is a diamond is a sapphire is whatever else anyone chooses for their engagement rings. You could always stack some bands together and get a truly unique look! Soliataires are the best for that!
Post # 14
Or, what about something like this? http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER5351W44SA
You could keep your diamond as the center, and this setting incorporates sapphires and a halo which you mentioned liking.
Post # 15
Just tell him. If you can’t tell him you dont like the ring, you are in trouble, cause there are plenty of things in the future that will make that look like a piece of cake. Tell him.
Post # 16
It’s great that he did go for quality over size though. My FI got me a .60 carat but the specs are incredible and it is colorless and almost flawless. This sucker isn’t very big but it sparkles like CRAZY and blows bigger duller diamonds out of the water.