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wow! kudos to you for keeping ur head up girl! things'll wrk out fine :-)
my kitchen ceiling has been leaking....turns out where the main roof meets the lower roof, the flashing is popping off cuz the previous owner did a half-a$$ job getting it redone and you'd think it'd be an easy fix, but nope....to top it off, i'm in foreclosure (whole different thread a posted a few weeks back) so its really frustrating that i have to put money into a house that won't be mine anymore.....
it is what it is thought...i'm keeping positive and looking forward to the future FH and I have together, including starting our adventure looking for a place together after i clear my storm for lack of a better term...lol :-)
We had a similar issue with our house situation. FI and I were also not married (not even engaged!) when we began, but our realtor was very upfront about the financial situation - mostly that as a teacher, I didn't qualify, but since my FI did, we'd basically "hide" my info and go through the process as if I wasn't there, until it was time to sign the deed (in other words - I'm not on the loan, but I am on the deed. The loan becomes "mine" when we get married - yay). The problem came when my in-laws offered to help us with the downpayment (to this day, I am still so.very.grateful for their help. They are so modest, so for them to gift that to us was a HUGE deal, and was kinda like their way of letting us know that they approve of us and the as-yet-unofficial wedding that we all figured was coming at that point). The problem was that they don't keep their money in the bank - they are very old-fashioned and keep it in jars and various places around the house, so there was no way to "trace" it, which the lender said was very important on all money (this also explains your rant of the random $200 - I've had several friends who've been asked about random deposits and checks from up to 5 years prior to purchasing the home - it's not actually rare, but it is VERY frustrating!). So I hope you don't feel like they are being too critical - they really do have to track ALL of your finances from the past 5 years (our lender said it's to basically make sure that all the money can be traced so they know the home isn't being purchased through "less-than-reputable" means).
I'm really sorry that you are dealing with this stress so close to your wedding, but I am glad to hear that others are being accomodating to you in your time of need. I promise that once you have the house and you get settled in, all the crazy drama goes away, and it will be SO.FREAKING.WORTH.IT. The way I feel about my house is indescribable - worth all the crazy repairs, sprinkler issues (still doesn't work, old owners won't tell us how) - but it's ours and we can change anything we want :-)
Haha thanks guys! It helps to know that I'm not alone.
And bunnyfoofoo, thanks for the anecdote about the money tracing. It's good to know that there is actually a reason why that matters so much!
UGH! What a pain! I'm so sorry you have to deal with this! I'm in the same shoes as your FI when it comes to the additional income. For the past two years I haven't noted the my non-taxable income. I really hope we don't end up in the same situation.
Sending a hug your way.
Basically the reason they want to "trace" your money is to make sure the money isn't another loan. If you "secretly" took out a "loan" of $5,000 that suddenly appeared in your bank that "lender" could claim rights to your deed. That is why you do a title search.
Arrghh. Home buying/selling is way more stressful than wedding planning. I didn't have anywhere near the drama you are experiencing buying my townhouse, although the seller did decide that the stove was hers, so when I went to the final walk through there was a big empty spot where the stove use to be.....it did get resolved. Selling the townhouse.....was more stressful because the person buying didn't have their finances in order (and not because of things like you explain). Just know things will calm down and you and your FH will have a lovely house to come home to once you are married! :)
Similar situation here.
My DH (FI at the time) couldn't be on the loan because he is Canadian and didn't have a social security number. Even though he has a great job and could buy our whole house himself, I had to be on the mortgage by myself. I couldn't qualify by myself because I already owned two rental properties. Even though I had signed lease agreements and proof of rent on income tax statements, they wouldn't let me claim the rent as income.
My grandfather agreed to co-sign for my loan. He has a TON of money in savings, but his only income is Social Security. The bank would only look at his income, not savings to qualify him for the loan. So we didn't qualify! It was crazy. My Grandpa could have bought our house 10 times with his savings!!
I cried many, many nights thinking we were going to loose our dream house. Everytime it seemed like we had found a solution, something fell through.
Luckily, after switching lenders 3 times, we finally found one who did Portfolio loans (holds the loans in-house), instead of traditional loans which sell them to Freddie Mac or Fannie Mae and therefore make you fit into nice little buckets to qualify. The new lender looked at our whole picture and realized that we were more than qualified for a loan. We have been happily living in our fantastic house for a year now!
Keep your chin up. Where there's a will, there's a way!
UPDATE:
Well, we walked into the seller's/landlady's office on Friday only to be told that our loan docs were in! We gave her a check, then immediately drove to the title company to sign them. We had lots of people helping us move which was wonderful, and now escrow is estimated to close on Tuesday. Thanks for the support everyone. We knew we'd get it figured out eventually but it was such a pain in the heinie.
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So we're buying a house and we're *almost* there. We've had repairs made to the place, gotten a permit for the addition, and put furniture pieces from Ikea on our registry, etc. We're also 16 days away from the wedding, but I digress.
We'd gotten used to all the hoop jumping involved in getting a loan (and there is a lot and even our mortgage broker says it's unusually RIDICULOUS), but the other day we got a call that made our hearts stop. FI didn't file taxes the past two years because all of his income was non-taxable (we've now had the conversation about filing taxes whether you need to or not) and our real estate agent flipped a lid, saying that we could get sued (and probably would be) by the seller, that he could lose his license, that his company had lost a lot of money on the place, etc. This resulted in my post-suicidal veteran husband hiding his head under a pillow thinking he'd ruined our future and apologizing to me over and over again. Awwwwwesoooooome. Excuse me while I tearfully make him promise he won't hurt himself, then go sob on his chest blubbering that I need him in order to live. (Incidentally, the thought of suicide never crossed his mind.)
Turns out it wasn't as drastic as originally thought. Our agents' tax accountant sent a letter to the lender stating that FI filing taxes or not was a moot point so that's all squared away. They also had me send my tax transcripts from the IRS to the lender for verification of something or other. BUT this afternoon I get a call from our broker and the lender is claiming that there's a discrepancy of $217 for 2008 and $17 for 2009 between my earnings statement from the IRS and what's on my tax return. And they want to know why that is. After everything that had happened, I was terrified that this meant they would drop our loan so I asked the broker, "does this mean that they won't lend to us?" to which the broker let out a frustrated sigh and said "no. You qualify, they'll lend to you. I have no idea why they're doing this or why they care."??????Okay, first, I gave my accountant all my W-2s for those years, and my accountant is awesome so I must have screwed up somewhere but I don't know where. Second, why does it matter? If they're going to lend to us anyway, why is $288 spread out from two years ago holding us up?
Then I figured something out.
We're getting a wholesale loan that lenders only do for brokers, and this particular lender is getting out of the business of doing them as of the end of this month so, in effect, the people processing our loan are working themselves out of a job. So I asked myself, if I knew that once the loan I was working on was finished I'd be out of a job in this economy, wouldn't I drag my feet? The answer is perhaps I would. I'm not in that situation, so I can't blame them, but do they have to scare the living soup out of us? We have to be out of our apartment on Monday, which means we were slated to move into our house on Saturday. My cousin very generously gifted us a fridge that is slated to be delivered on Saturday, same with a new washer and dryer that we got on sale, the cable guy coming out to switch us over, and a bunch of our friends helping with the move. Suddenly it wasn't going to happen. ~STRESS~
Luckily, the seller is a total sweetheart. She knows what's going on and is willing to rent the house to us until such time as our loan is finalized or we find another lender. We're taking her cookies and the cleaning deposit tomorrow.
Ugh. I'm so stressed out right now. Wedding planning, not a big deal. If I'd been thinking clearly I would have gone house hunting AFTER the wedding since I'm missing out on the fun of the last two weeks of planning. In a way that's a really wonderful thing since wedding planning by comparison is pretty dern relaxing. Regardless, the silver lining - as always - is FI. He really is my angel.
Who wants to vent about house stuff???