Post # 1
ok bee’s I have some news. I am getting married in 23 days and my Maid/Matron of Honor has not ordered her dress yet. AHHHHHH! SO a little information: the dress is from JCrew and takes about 1 week to 1.5 weeks to get in. If she orders it by this weekend (which she has been telling me she would do since Jan!) it will get to her in time but prob not enough time for any alterations. Please vote in my poll to help me with this added stress!
Post # 3
or tell me what you would do if the poll doesn’t cover it
Post # 4
Eek. I would buy it in her size and then send her the bill so she could pay you back. As a huge procrastinator from a long line of procrastinators with many procrastinators for friends (and *cough* fiance), I’m doing this for my bridesmaids because I know how they are. 😛
Post # 5
I would say either 1)sit with her WHILE she orders it if possible or 2) buy the dress in her size just in case……I dont think nagging her will do much since you have probably been telling her to do it since January (or whenever) and she still hasnt done it! Next time you are at her plae or she is at yours just say “hey lets go on the jcrew website and order your dress, I dont want you to have to be naked at my wedding!” Im sure this will do the trick!
Post # 6
First, I would ask her why she hasn’t ordered it. Maybe she has some hesitations about being in the wedding but is too chicken to bring it up. The last think you would want would be to buy her a dress, and then have her not show up on the wedding day or something.
If you’ve spoken to her about it and it turns out she is just a really bad procrastinator and there aren’t any deeper issues, then refocus on the dress. I wouldn’t buy it for her, because you will probably never get paid back. What is J. Crew’s return policy? It they allow returns within 30 days, I would say buy her a dress in her size, but keep it hidden away and don’t tell her about it. If she orders herself a dress you can just return the one you ordered and she’ll never know you were planning on her flaking. If she doesn’t order the dress, then you can bring out the one you ordered and give it to her. BUT I would make her pay you in cash before you give her the dress. Otherwise I think you’ll never see that money.
Sorry you’re stuck dealing with other people’s flakiness when you should be focusing on yourself so close to the wedding 🙁
Post # 7
I would be super offended if I was your Maid/Matron of Honor and you bought the dress for me and then sent me a receipt. I think if you are that worried, then take a trip with her up to the store to order it there. Make it like a date with dinner or whatever.
My Maid/Matron of Honor is doing the same thing and I trust she’ll get it in time, but we’re a lot farther out than you guys are. She just needs a dress, alterations are her problem if she can’t get them done.
Post # 8
I picked the Punch Her option, just because that’s what I’d feel like doing. But, don’t actually do it because then you’ll probably need another MOH!
Post # 9
Hahaha I picked the “punch her in the face” too.
Kidding, obviously, but I would feel like doing it also. Reiterate to her that if it’s not ordered by this weekend, she won’t get it in time. And that is stressing you out. Then I would ask her if she’s doing okay financially and see if that’s the reason she hasn’t ordered yet.
Post # 10
I would SO punch my MOH! lol. Not really but I’d be like “D, you NEED THIS DRESS NOW”. But really, WHY is she waiting? Money??
Post # 11
Ok, honestly, I’d order it for her and not really care if she’s offended. Really! You’ve asked her to do this one thing and she hasn’t managed to do it. You can be offended, but all she can really do is be sorry. Sorry that she’s causing you stress on what should be a stress-free issue this close to what will likely be a kind of stressful couple of weeks. Come. On. She agreed to be your Maid/Matron of Honor and if NOTHING else that means she buys the dress and shows up. Should have already been done. I’m SO sorry you’re dealing with this!
Post # 12
I also voted “punch her in the face”
Here is what just happened with my Maid/Matron of Honor and our JCrew Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses. I gave them 4 options, one of which was like $30 more expensive than the other three. Maid/Matron of Honor liked that one the best but was going to go with a less expensive one. I said don’t worry I’ll cover the $30 if you like that one the best (and I also ordered it for her and she’s paying me back in like a month or two). So they came in really quickly, she took almost a month to come over and try it on (we both live in NYC) and she now decided she doesn’t like that one and now I have to exchange it for one of the other ones. She’s also playing the “I’ll lose weight” card with me. I’m like DUDE buy a dress that fits you and have it altered if you lose weight. So annoying.
I better not get a hard time from JCrew about this exchange or else I will seriously, literally punch her in the face – hence my vote. Your Maid/Matron of Honor is worse because you have 23 days. That’s just ridiculous. In all seriousness buy it for her and make her pay you back. It’s not rude to do that. What’s rude is to be someone’s Maid/Matron of Honor and be 23 days out from their wedding and not have bothered getting your dress.
Post # 13
I voted to punch her in the face, but only because I thought it was funny, not because I’m really a proponent of bridezilla violence! =)
In all seriousness though, that is super frustrating. I would call her up and just try to have a nice, but frank conversation about how important it is to me that she order her dress ASAP. Maybe try the angle of letting her know how much is on your mind in the last few weeks before the wedding, and it will just be one less thing for you to think about once she orders. And remind her sometimes shipping takes longer than expected, and you don’t want her to end up without a dress!
Post # 14
I picked to punch her. That would so make me mad. I agree to either take her to the store or sit there while she orders it. I am sure that she’ll get it done, but you don’t need that stress!
Post # 15
But, why is she hesitating? Is she playing the “I’ll lose weight” card maybe? Or has something happen between you? Is she out of money?
I voted for the naging.
Post # 16
Update: I emailed her and told her it was her daily nagging. She let me know that she wouldn’t miss the wedding unless she was dead and she is waiting for her job to pay her back travel expenses ad not to worry about it. I reminded her that it will take awhile to get the dress in…..I think I am still going to order one incase she waits too long.