Post # 1
I’m going to start by saying I don’t feel wedding party numbers need to match up exactly and I don’t feel that either side needs to be entirely one sex.
However, in my case the sides are becoming very uneven.
My FI has asked 5 people to stand up for him as attendants. His brother, his sister, and three of his best friends – all female – one of whom he dated for 2+ years post college. I don’t care about the ex, frankly I really like her and think she’s a fantastic friend but she has previously met his family as his girlfriend so I feel the information is pertinent.
On my side I just have 2 people, my sister and my female best friend. I’m a huge introvert and just don’t have many friends.
I’m basically afraid that guests will be so distracted by the hugely uneven sides and the ex-girlfriend on his side that they won’t really enjoy our wedding ceremony. Maybe I also don’t want to look like I only have one friend. I don’t want to ask him to have fewer attendants, are there any other ideas to make this less obvious?
Post # 3
Could you swap one or two of his female attendants to stand on your side? It sounds like tradition isn’t a huge factor (him having female attendants and the uneven number). so would it bother you if you just “shared” the attendants and split them on both sides? Everyone is there for both of you, so I don’t see why the people on your side have to be yours and same for his side. They are there for both of you!
Post # 4
Hm.. Personally, I wouldn’t want his ex in the Bridal Party. I feel like if I was worried about the uneven bridal party that would be an easy person from fh side to eliminate. I’d also have the same worry you mentioned above that it’d be weird since his family met him as his girlfreind origionally.
But if you eliminated her then I think 4 to 2 isn’t weird looking at all. I doubt people will look too much into your bridal party when they’ll be staring at you on that day. If you still want one more person to even it out, do you have a female cousin you could ask? Or an Aunt?
Just a thought!
Post # 5
I don’t know the set-up of your ceremony (ie: church/park/hall) but would it be possible to have the party stand behind you two in a line, not separated like usual? They could walk down individually, too.
Post # 6
If he has already asked all those people, you can’t exactly cut them at this point. Yes, I would suggest a rearranging, or just roll with it. My brother had one more person on his side (there were still 10), and my SIL was hurting for people so she asked my sister and I, plus, I ended up walking with two guys when we exited. It was fun, and I don’t think it seemed too weird.
However, the ex this is still a bit weird, but again, it’s not like you can uninvite them.