Unfortunately….it's over :(

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
715 posts
Busy bee

(Hugs) That’s so lame that he won’t even give the two of you a chance to work on things. There probably was a lot more going on – so I’d assume you’ll be better off without him in the end.

Post # 3
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

So sorry you’re going through this.  e-hugs. 🙁

Post # 4
357 posts
Helper bee

NicoleLyn1218:  I’m sorry to hear that, but I agree. There’s gotta be a lot more going on and he’s using this as an excuse to blame you and get out of this relationship so you look like the bad guy.

Consider yourself dodged a bullet.

Post # 5
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I am so sorry you are going through  this. I went through something similar to your situation but we are trying to work it out. I think there is more to the situation that he is not telling you. Maybe once he gets over being angry you guys can talk about it. You should not blame yourself for his lame excuses and nobody deserves to be treated like this…

Post # 6
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

So he sees another woman, and then puts the blame on *you* because you logged on his facebook. Real classy. He wants to leave you and doesn’t even have the b*lls to take responsibillity.

(((Hugs))). You’re hurting now but you’re better off without him.

EDIT: About wedding related costs: I assume you have an engagement ring. Don’t give it back until he pays his share. (But if he does, the right thing is to return the ring).

Post # 7
1840 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

NicoleLyn1218:  hugs! It really sounds like he may have met someone else and then latched on to the first reason he could find to break up with you. So sorry you are hurting – but he is shady and you will find yourself a man who doesn’t lie and manipulate. 

Post # 8
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

i think it sounds like there’s something else going on (likely kayla since he lied about her…) and he is clinging to that one instance of you logging into his facebook as an excuse to break up with you – it’s such a small indiscretion and his response is completely disproportionate. I’m so sorry – but at least you won’t have a husband who works so little at your marriage :/ I’m sure things will work out for the best!

Post # 9
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I am so sorry. It sounds like he is doing something he doesn’t want you to know about as hard as it is, it’s better to find out before the wedding. Divorce is no fun. Hang in there. 

Post # 10
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Yeh i agree with aussiemum,he has something going on with this kayla and is using you looking at his facebook as a very convenient excuse. And with the circumstances i dont blame you one bit for looking,i would have too!

He has outright lied to you with the whole ‘didnt know she had my number’.Clearly they had been texting all weekend so thats bull! So forget what he has said about her,forget what he has tried to do in blaming you,and focus on the fact that you are now free of a man who has blantantly lied to your face and broken your trust. 

Keep your dignity intact and hold your head up high as you pack your stuff and move out.Sending you massive internet hugs,its so hard to go  through this shit but you WILL get through this and you will be stronger for it i promise. 

Good luck hun

Post # 11
9206 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

I am so sorry 🙁

Post # 12
3 posts

So sorry to hear. I get that everyone needs space, but surely if you have nothing to hide and it was a one off from you it’s not that big a deal? 

Hope you can start afresh. Sometimes it’s better to move on sooner rather than later.

Post # 13
1236 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA

I am so, so sorry this happened to you. Personally, snooping isn’t something I’d tolerate in an SO either – I wouldn’t marry someone who couldn’t trust me, and would consider that kind of violation a dumpable offense. Although it does show that maybe the relationship wasn’t working for *either* of you. Still, that really sucks for you, and I’m sure you will find the one who can really make you happy! Good luck with the move, and many hugs.

Post # 14
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

NicoleLyn1218:  SO sorry! Don’t let him blame you for the FB thing. He was looking for a way out and blaming you makes an easy excuse.

Post # 15
4649 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

NicoleLyn1218:  Oh no! That’s awful to be going through that. And like a PP said, sounded like he was the one straying, yet putting the blame on you (“you looked at my FB so let’s break up”). I’m soooo sorry you are going through this. But it WILL get better and you are right. You deserve way better. And trust me, there is better out there!! Take care!!

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