Post # 1
First off, hello all! I am MissSunshine. I just got engaged on Friday (!!!!) and am in the beginning stages of planning. I Adore my future hubby’s sister, even though we have only met one time. We really got along and she is super sweet. He is also extremely close to her (which I love). Here is the unique part… she has Down Syndrome. I decided instantly that my wedding party would consist of my sister and his sister. I just really want her to be involved. My question is this… are there any challenges I should be prepared for? I really don’t anticipate many (except finding a dress she is comfortable with) but if anyone else had a BM with special needs, I would love love LOVE to hear about the experience!
Post # 3
hmm..Interesting!! I have a BM that has spina bifida which is very limiting. She also lives across the country. I think communication is key with her! I let my BM tell me what she was comfortable with, when the time comes, she’s going to go try on bridesmaid dresses so she is comfortable with the style we pick. She’s also allergic to flowers, so her bouquet will either be carnations or silk flowers.
Just have a chat with your FSIL and find out what she is comfortable with and do what you can to make her feel comfortable!
Post # 4
i agree – talk with her – and see what SHE wants to do. who knows, maybe she’ll enlighten you with ideas you’ve never even thought of! Also – of course – talk to your FI and their parents.
I absolutely love the idea that you want to include your FI’s sister in your wedding party – DS or not. I’ve honestly only met my SIL one time and there’s SO much drama involved…ugh. but anyways – i say good luck and I’m sure it’ll be wonderful!!
Post # 5
Hi there, welcome to the Hive and congrats on your new engagement. I commented on a post the other day by a bee named MissMeg who is having some of her students as guests at her wedding. She teaches special education, and I’m assuming a number of them have Down’s Syndrome. You may want to PM her with any specific questions and concerns. Happy planning!
Post # 6
Check out Mrs Seashell’s blogging about her experiences!
Honored to Have My Maid of Honor
Dressing the Sis
Dressing the Sis: The Sash Solution
(I just skimmed for ones that I knew mentioned her sister, she may talk more about the emotional/relational/practical side of things elsewhere)
Post # 7
It depends on the kid, but more than likely, she’ll be just fine–in fact, she’d probably LOVE to be incldued. The only thing to watch for is that kids with Downs Syndrome can be very stubborn if they get an idea in their head. But I think it’ll mean so much to her to be in your wedding!
Post # 8
Thanks everyone!!! SUPER helpful responses 🙂
We are going to be seeing her in about 4 weeks, so I am waiting until we are in person to tell her. Both his parents were surprised (in a good way) and gave us some good tips too!
Also, a few responses referenced “kid”… She turned 35 on Sunday! I think she will do great!
Post # 9
How wonderful to include her in your special day! My cousin has an older Down’s syndrome friend in her in-laws family…(I think they are dear friends who are like family to her DH) Anyway, I know that people with Down’s can have some unique issues. I would think that your FILs will be able to guide you in helping this special SIL enjoy the day… Just a thought… that would probably have a lot of meaning to her family… what about having her dad escort her down the aisle? My guess is that she will never marry, and that would be an experience that would be special to both her and her dad. He could walk her up the aisle and then take his seat with his wife who could be escorted to the pew by another groomsman or by her husband prior to this walk… It also might help this bridesmaid if she has any difficulty in walking…
Post # 10
@MissSunshine: Sorry–I’m not sure why, but somehow it got translated in my head that it was a kid! Well, the lady will be happy to be in the ceremony, anyway 🙂