(Closed) Unresponsive Bridesmaids

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should I drop my Bridesmaids?
    Only the unresponsive ones. Keep your sister and the other good Bridesmaid. : (19 votes)
    59 %
    Get rid of them all!!!!! : (1 votes)
    3 %
    Keep trying to communicate with them. : (12 votes)
    38 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1966 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    My sister had a similar issue with her bm’s. She basically gave them a dress deadline. “Hey girls we picked dress xyz, you have until set date or it won’t be here in time. Thanks!”. One girl didn’t get it. It was good riddance!  Good luck!

    Post # 4
    Member
    1966 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Ohh yea I voted keep the responsive ones! 

    Post # 5
    Member
    516 posts
    Busy bee

    I have a two-faced response, lol:

    1) This is why I hate the idea of obligatory bridal attendants (fiance’s relatives, your own distant relatives, friends you’ve grown apart from, etc.)- because they don’t really care about being good bridesmaids, and then there’s tension.

    2) That being said, I think it might cause family drama if you kick the non-responsive b’maids now.  I don’t know what your FI would think of it, but I’m willing to guess somebody will start some sh*t over it.

    I guess I don’t really have advice for you, but good luck!

    Post # 6
    Member
    477 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I didn’t vote – but I agree with MsSparklyBee – can’t cause too much drama if you tell the the lastest date they have to order the dress and they don’t – to me, that’s them telling YOU they don’t want to be in the wedding anymore.

     

    Dood luck!

    Post # 7
    Member
    477 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    …and by ‘dood luck’, I obviously meant ‘good luck’ 🙂

    Post # 9
    Member
    128 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I have a question…do they want to be bridesmaids? For your FI’s sisters, he should be the one to talk to them. I would set a deadline and if they don’t respond to that, kindly let them know that planning a wedding is stressful enough and that you would love for them to be guests but you have decided to reduce the wedding party by 3.

    BTW, we will only have my sister who is an obligatory attendant. If she weren’t my sister, we’d have none.

    Post # 10
    Member
    337 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @Miss Moxy:  

    im going through the same thing,but with my cousin.

    my daughter and i have called her for a month now and have been ignored,we have spoken to her husband who says he will give her our messages,one time he said she should be calling you back this evening,it was already almost 6:30pm.that was the last time we bothered with her,2 weeks ago.

    if she doesnt order her dress in the next 2 weeks she will not get it on time.im at a point were i really honestly dont care if she gets her dress,i dont want her in my wedding now,i dont want her,i dont need her.

    im not kicking her out,instead im letting it go because i know she will not get her dress on time.i dont think she will even bother trying to get it,so i dont have to worry about her being in my wedding.i was going to replace her,but im not,my side is going to have one less,i dont care,ill have a groomsman walk 2 girls out together,it will be fine.

     

    you gave your deadline of them getting their dress,let it go,if they get it,they do,if not,they kicked their own selfs out,if you want to replace them,have your new girls go get their dresses,everything will work out and you wont look like the bad guy for kicking them out.

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    762 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    ive been going threw something similiar. shes not a relative, just a friend. I was in her wedding and orignally she was going to be my only bm along with my sister who is the MOH. now tho i added 2 more BMs. everyone has been really corporative and ordered their dresses already. due to finacial reasons we have already had to move our wedding back once. now because of that my last girl is refusing to order her dress! she says she will once its closer but the way she went about it was like really??!! she didnt even have the balls to tell me she was going to wait! we were ordering them online so i was the one in charge of getting all the measurements and money from everyone so things didnt get mixed up with everyone ordering on their own. well everytime i asked for hers she said she didnt get a change to do them yet or didnt have the money or just coming up with excuses. finally she was the only one left and the guy we were ordering from said he wouldnt send the others until he had them all so i really had to get on her. when she still wouldnt budge i had my MOH try. that when she finally said oh im not ordering until the wedding is closer! oh i was pissed!!! so now we ordered the rest without her and hopefully she doesnt wait too long cause we’ve actually been having a bunch of issues with the dress guy too. but shes been pulling a bunch of other stuff too to really piss me off and i cant decide if i want to kick her out or not.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2359 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would get FI to talk to them.  Maybe they don’t want to be BMs but feel they have to.   I don’t understand this whole having his sisters in your bridal party, unless you’ve become very close with them. I can’t imagine feeling obligated to have a BM I wasn’t close with just because……

    The topic ‘Unresponsive Bridesmaids’ is closed to new replies.

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