Post # 1
I found out this week that my twin sister doesn’t support my relationship between me and FI. She thinks I’m keeping secrets about my past relationships from him. I’m not. He knows everything…all the dirty details. She even threatened to email him and ask what he thought about it all. I told her to stop trying to create drama when there was none to create. She then started posting passive-aggressive statuses on facebook. Some of our friends who know us and our history were able to read between the lines. They wrote me and said some not-so-nice things about her. I told her (but not who said it) thinking it would make her stop, but instead she posted this long status about how apparently she was jealous of me, she was immature, passive-aggressive, petty, blah, blah, blah.
I’ve asked her to step down from the wedding party because FI and I want people who will support us in our relationship and in our marriage. It just seems hypocritical to have her stand by my side when she doesn’t. She then told me that she wasn’t going to have the money for it anyway. WHAT? Our wedding is over a year away! All she would have to pay for was her dress and airfare (she’s in California). Everything else was going to be covered. She was like-well, that’s $1000 I don’t have. Um, ok? I didn’t realize she thought so little of me that she couldn’t make my wedding a priority to save for over the course of a year.
I’m just baffled that my only sibling, my twin sister, is acting like this. Has anyone else had to deal with something similar? How did you handle it? At this point, it doesn’t even look like she’ll try to attend the wedding.
Post # 3
@missyjane77: I had a similar situation. My oldest sister is very judgemental. When i asked her if I could ask her daughter to be my flower girl, she said you need to wait a while because I know your record (I had been engaged 2 times prior to that). When we went to try on bridesmaid dresses. She kept trying to change the color because she didn’t think that she looked good in teal. Doesn’t matter what the situation is to her, she always has to put in her 2 cents and it’s always negative.
I hope she turns herself around for you! Good luck!
Post # 4
Sounds like she is jealous- you are doing what I would do- stick to your guns about this.
Post # 5
Ridiculous! The best revenge is living well. Good for you on making the decision to have people standing next to you who support you. The only thing you can do for her is let her figure her own crazy sh*t out and move on with planning a celebration of your relationship. It seems like she feeds off attention and drama, particularly from her posting stuff on Facebook. You’re doing the right thing by not giving it to her. Big hugs for having to deal with this crap when it’s supposed to be a happy time! It’s hard, but all you can do is do your best to focus on the good people around you.
Post # 6
I am so sorry that your sister is being this way. I am also going through something similar. I do not have a large family and the ones that I have I really do not speak to…so I basically just have my sister and she has done nothing but put me down the entire process of planning. I think that orginally she wanted control over planning and when I finally grew a pair and told her that I was going to be planning the wedding she got really nasty. She was doing everything that she liked and I knew that I needed to be true to myself and make my wedding about me and not let her make it about her. She is already married but got married really young and didn’t have a super fabulous wedding. So, I think that she was trying to make my wedding the wedding that she never had. It’s hard when you expect the people close to you to be supportive and they are anything but…I feel your frustration and anger. I have been just doing my thing and I figure if she doesn’t like it that is her too bad! This day is about you and your fiance and the love that you have together and want to share with people that love and care for you both…focus on the positives!