(Closed) Unsure of how to go about our renewal ceremony.

posted 7 years ago in Vow Renewals
Post # 3
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

hi there! we are renewing after 15 years of marriage. I can tell you that current etiquette dictates that for renewals, you are not walked down the aisle by anyone but either a child of yours or your husband. The tradition of a father walking you down the aisle is rooted in the idea that dad is passing his daughter off to her new life. Well, obviously, you are already married so it’s not seen as appropriate.

Let me be clear-DO WHAT YOU WANT! I have struggled with how much like a wedding I want our renewal to be, and how much of it is that I want to celebrate 15 years of love and laughter. So, we’re doing a very stripped down version of vows and/or wedding things.

Here is how ours will go: we will talk in, together. we will come through double doors and walk up a pseudo aisle. We will then face one another and reaffirm our vows to one another, with no officiant. We will promise to continue to love, honor, and cherish one another. Blah Blah. Then we will kiss, and turn tot he crowd and say how much we appreciate having them there with us. Off to cocktail hour with guests, then eat and dance w00t.

The main things you are supposed to aviod for vow renewals are things such as “firsts.” First dance, cake cutting, bachelorette party, showers, etc. Since it is a renewal, and you’ve obviously lived together as married you are really celebrating the joy of marriage at a renewal, not the act of getting married.

Post # 5
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I think having someone stand up and present you, as well as do the ceremony is fine. Exchanging rings is fine as long as there is something in your vows stating you will gift one another with new rings to symbolize the new start or something like that.

Really, a renewal is anything goes as long as you don’t try to get gifts and pretend like it’s a first time wedding LOL. We are also doing a dessert table with mini pies, cupcakes, cheesecake, etc rather than a wedding cake. And while we will dance as a couple it will not be a spotlight dance where no one else is welcome.

Guess that’s a long way of me saying your vision sounds fine πŸ™‚

Post # 7
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

dollar dance is a no-no for me. We’ve got enough money to pull off a $15K renewal so it’s kind of rude if you know what I mean LOL. I mean, with 2 kids going into college this August is might be nice, but no.

Mini pies for us! I love them. We make them for events we have here at the house (we’re big into entertaining) so we want to have them at the renewal. We will do mini cherry, apple and lemon ice box. YUMMERS! I am not going for a candy bar because I don’t want to bother but it’s a great idea. And our favors are the pics from the photo booth πŸ™‚

Post # 9
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

HI THERE,

MY HONEY AND I ARE RENEWING OUR WEDDING VOWS IN OCTOBER TO CELEBRATE 20 YEARS OF MARRIAGE!!!  NOT SAYING OUR ORIGINAL VOWS, BUT BASICALLY SAYING WE STILL LOVE EACH OTHER AND WILL BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER TILL OUR LAST BREATH.  THE MINISTER THAT MARRIED US WILL BE THERE WITH US ALSO.  WE ARE COMING IN DIFFERENT DOORS, WALKING TOWARDS EACH OTHER AND THEN THE AISLE TOGETHER.  OUR GIRLS ARE WALKING IN BEFORE US ON “YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL” BY BABYFACE.  WE ARE COMING IN ON ” WHEN I FOUND YOU” BY BB WINANS.  WE ARE GOING TO DO A UNITY SAND CEREMONY WITH THE KIDS, AND MY HUBBY IS GIVING ME AN ETERNITY RING.  WE ARE GOING TO DANCE TO “STILL” BY TAMIA.  LISTEN TO IT.    I THINK YOU WILL LOVE IT!!  WE ARE THEN HAVING A DANCE FOR ALL THE MARRIED COUPLES, AND THEN SEE WHO HAS BEEN MARRIED THE LONGEST WHILE PLAYING  “THROUGH THE YEARS” BY KENNY ROGERS.  WHOEVER WINS GETS A CROWNED “KING AND QUEEN OF MARRIAGE”.  THEN OFF TO THE PARTYING… πŸ™‚  

Post # 10
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I make mini pies in a cupcake pan. I also sometimes use the mini graham cracker shells to do like cheesecake type ones. Very easy! Just google mini pies and lots of links will come up. I am actually making mini lemon tortes right now for a party we’re having tomorrow LOL. We sure love some mini pies around here Laughing

 

as for our budget-we’ve save since we married 15 years ago for this event. We had a big wedding planned but my mommy got sick and we had to move the wedding up so she could be there. We ended up doing a JoP wedding in the living room next to her hospital bed. He greatest wish was to see me married so I gave up  my dream of a big affair so she could see it. So, we’re ready to do it big and pary hard in a few months!

Post # 12
Member
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Not sure if I’m doing this wrong- but my family is supporting and encouraging me 100% so thats all that matters to me!

-My father and step father are still walking me down the aisle. This has been a dream of my father’s since I was born and it’s what he wants. We will change the wording of “who gives this bride” to something different to fit the situation though.

-We are having a cake! I want a big pretty cake and how often do people get yummy really expensive wedding cake? Not often enough! No one will complain about us having a cake lol.

-I am wearing a white dress and it will be formal- not a princess dress, but still very “bridal”.

-We will also do the couple’s dance and after a short time invite all other couples to join in on the song. And we will have a father daughter mother son and again start off just us then invite others as well.

-We’re even having toasts and a (small) wedding party.

…The way I see it is that we’re paying for it so we should have what we want. It will be a small (50 people) wedding but it will be formal and very nice. I REALLY want to spoil our family and friends and have everyone have a memorable night! My family is all excited to come and agrees with what we’re doing- HIS family calls it a “fake wedding”. Whatever you cant please everyone! Although why anyone would be upset by a huge nice party that they DONT have to pay for and get to eat, drink, and dance for free, is BEYOND ME! We’re not registered so they dont even have to brings gifts, just love and support πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
1636 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I am having a 20 year vow renewal in 2013.  I’m quite excited.  We have been through all the vows.

I am DIYing pretty much everything in my wedding, my youngest son will walk me down the aisle and my eldest son will act as “officiant” with readings etc… My daughter will be my MOH.  And thats it.  Then when we kiss a song will play and all will be invted to dance with us.

We are having a complete wedding of my dreams on the cheap!  richer/poorer (LOL we are at the poorer, but very happy)… also going through sickness/health. 

 

I say if this is your “real” wedding (and it sounds like it is, the ceremony you have always dreamed about)  do whatever you want:) 

Thats all, I guess I wasn’t that much help, but it sounds like you deserve a ceremony.  Have your father(s) officially give you to your husband, it is meaningful, I think, and it sounds like it will definitely mean something to them…

its your day, have it your way:)  that is what I am doing!

Ronney

Post # 15
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Welcome! We are doing the exact same thing, we were married in a small lakeside destination ceremony last year and on our one year anniversary, are having a renewal ceremony and big reception. I’m having my mom and dad both walk me down the aisle because they are always there for me and should be with down the aisle. Plus, guests who didn’t attend last year never saw me walked down the aisle by Dad. Congrats!

Post # 16
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

This somewhat like my plan too. We are having a small wedding with just family this year and then doing the big church wedding/reception next year. People may think it is werid but my parents did the same thing! they got married had 3 daughters and on thier 5 year anniversary got married in the church. At the reception they did all the first and no one said a thing. People there are suppose to be the ones you know and love and then they should know why you had to do some things backwards. Every girl should get the wedding of her dreams whether its the frist time they say I do or 20 years at a vow renewal. Best of luck to you!!!

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