Post # 1
Ok, so I have a bridesmaid that is a known Drug addict and is back with her Drug dealing b/f. She has major depression, anxiety issues and doesn’t like being around people she doesn’t know. She is NEVER reliable and has a problem with “being told/asked” to do something. (Major attitude issues) Now mind you she is a bridesmaid that i really didn’t want. She is my sister. My mother is insisting that she will be just fine for the wedding and will do everything she is supposed to. So far, she has not. On the day all of the girls went to the shop to look at dresses, she sat in the corner and ignored us all. When i tried to talk to her she covered her ears like a child. I have exactly 9 months to the day till my wedding.. and she was getting better but has not reverted back to her old ways. I want to have a good friend of mine replace her and have her as an attendant but my mother won’t allow this. Anytime i try to talk to my mom about this, she tells me “not to worry about it, everything will be fine. end of discussion.”
I’m torn between, the feeling of she’s my sister, but at the same time, i can’t trust her.
Post # 3
to keep the peace, i might just keep her as a BM but have no expectations. maybe you will have to do some extra to make sure she gets her dress, but other than that, don’t worry about her. if you don’t ask her to do anything, then she can’t let you down.
Post # 4
@dynamic_duo: i totally agree. in this (very difficult, i’m sure) situation i would keep the peace, and place no expectations on her. then if she does step up, you can be pleasantly surprised.
also, if there’s someone else you’d like to include in your party, you should just ask them. you don’t have to kick out your sister to have another bridesmaid.
Post # 5
So I have called/texted my sister for 3 weeks straight to no avail. I have yet to her a singel word from her. So MR.B made the decision that planning a wedding is already stressful and her lack of response was disrespctful and he was not going to have someone like that in our wedding so we decided together that we would move her to Guest book attendant.. and that is if she even shows.
Come to find out my parents have not heard from my middle sister in over a month.. they know she is alive bc she is making phone calls (they pay her phone bill) but she hasn’t even given my parents the respect to phone them. So when we broke the news to my parents, they totaly understood and agreed with us. It is amazing how much stress this has had on me.. that i didn’t even realize until the weight was lifted off my shoulders.
Everyone is more excited about the wedding and are more at ease that the wedding party will be great!!
Thanks for all the advice
Post # 6
I am so glad it all worked out then. No more worries! Just enjoy the process now 🙂