Update on mom's wedding day actions

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Honestly, I’d be PISSSSED. 

And she still won’t admit she did anything wrong, thats not fair

Post # 4
Member
6034 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think the first step is acknowledging what you are dealing with, and accepting it. If your mother passing out drunk was totally in-character behavior, then expecting to have a morning full of cherished mother-daughter moments was just setting yourself up for failure. This is the person she is, and while she may grow up at some point, she’s not going to do it on your timeline.  

Some people never have loving, tender relationships with their mothers, and you may unfortunately just be one of those people. Lower your expectations and accept that.  Once you do that, the rest will fall into place.

Post # 6
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@anonbee4040:  Like more of a I told you so kind of additude. 

Id tell her to blow me. 

She couldn’t let you have one day

Post # 9
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I wouldn’t give her a free pass on this one.  Make her wait it out a bit…

Post # 10
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@anonbee4040:  Yeah, sweetie. 

Email her back and say you weren’t look for excuses. 

And she can try again later

Post # 13
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@anonbee4040:  It’s crazy how some “apologies” come off like a punch in the face.  I don’t really have any advice for you.  I’m sorry she acted that way, especially since you mentioned that it’s really not in her character.  But you’re right, that’s not a real apology.  And at least you were honest and told her what you thought of it.  What a crummy situation for you, I’m sorry!

Post # 14
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Good, now go run yourself a bath, make a cocktail and relax. 

😉 

Post # 15
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

There seems to be some under-the-surface stuff that I can’t quite figure out.

Was this totally bizarre behavior for her? Or was it not that surprising? Is she used to drinking excessively with your dad?

You say you have a twice-a-day relationship, but yet this reluctance on her part to see that what she did was really extremely inappropriate, disapointing and embarassing.. and not to apologize… I don’t know, it just seems so odd. I feel like I’m missing one piece to the puzzle.

I agree with the PP who says you have to acknowledge who you’re dealing with. If this is the way she IS, you have to decide if it’s worth continuing the argument. Don’t get me wrong; I’d be completely pissed off as well! But how you proceed from here… well, what do you want your future relationship to be like?

Post # 16
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee

Wow, Im sorry this happened! I would be absolutely livid too. I hope you find a way to move on and she takes responsibility soon.

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