(Closed) Ups and Downs of a Long Engagement

posted 5 years ago in October 2014
Post # 3
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@felixfelicis:  I’m not an October 14 bride, but I can relate! Fiance and I are having an 18 month engagement which is finally about to come to a close. Honestly I wouldn’t do it this way if I could hit redo. It’s been so drawn out and being LDR doesn’t help either. But even when he was around, it was taking FOREVER! It was my mom who encouraged me to have a long engagment and she was acting like I would need 2 or 3 years to plan….yeah right. 1.5 had already been way too long for ne.

Post # 4
2457 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Our engagement was about 16 months long. I felt a little bit like you at first, but honestly, I was so happy to take my time to make decisions. I didn’t have to stress and pick a wedding date right away. I didn’t start *really* looking at venues until about 4-5 months into the engagement. Personally, I felt like I had some time to get used to the idea and enjoy being engaged without the stress of wedding planning (yet). And yes – we had time to save up, too!

I think you’ll probably enjoy your engagement and wedding planning a little more than if you had to rush everything and stress about decisions right away. 🙂

Post # 5
879 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Galang_Gyal:  agreed!

We had an 18 month engagement too, mainly because we got engaged in fall and wanted a Spring wedding (but longer than  6 month engagement). I loved that I got to take my time finding quality vendors and now that we’re so close, I’m relieved I’m not head high in to-do stuff! Trust everyone when they say the time goes quickly!!! Around the 12 month mark, I was getting antsy and wishing we had a shorter engagement, but I’m really happy we decided on a long engagement. Good luck to you! You have weddingbee to keep you company during the lulls 😉

Post # 6
5007 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I will be engaged for 16 months when we get married and I’ve loved it!! Yes it’s a long time, but being engaged has been the best time of my life so I’m glad to drag it out! Plus, it gave me plenty of time to slowly plan and deliberate and get the best deals. I would have been fine with a year, but this timing worked better for us.

Post # 7
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We’re over 6 months in to our 19 month engagement and it has flown by! It seriously feels like we just got engaged a week ago. I have the major things like venue,date,dress knocked out but Dad’s rules were we had to wait until after my college graduation. I did not realize how much there is to do! With being a full time student and working I never have time to do any wedding things, especially with living a few hours from home and  the wedding. I couldn’t image having the wedding any sooner even tho I totally wish it was! Some days I joke about going to the courthouse because of this long wait but it has flown by. I’ve gotten the best deals on vendors and plenty of time to search. All my friends engaged now are also having long engagement so it’s been fun to talk and plan with them since others may think it’s too early. 

Post # 8
1421 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

Yes!  We have been engaged since December 8th, 2012, and our date isn’t until September 20th, 2014.  I wish it were sooner, but know I need the ttime to save money. It will be worth it in the end… But I sure do get the ups and downs too! 

Post # 9
1497 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I got engaged in January 2012, and the wedding is in June 2013. It seemed like a long time at first, but it just FLEW by! It’s especially going fast now, as there’s so much to do before the big day!


Post # 10
18 posts
  • Wedding: June 2014

Our engagement will be 22 months long because we decided to buy a house first. At first it did upset me and thought it would be too long. Now we’ve been engaged 9 months and it’s actually going pretty quickly! It’s also nice because I have time to plan every little detail and do a lot of DIY ideas 🙂

Post # 11
4496 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

When we get married this October we will have been engaged for 2.5 years and together for 12 years (high school sweethearts)!!! We didn’t plan on the long engagement initally, but we ended up buying a house and that pushed the wedding back a little bit. Honestly, I think its been great. Yeah people thought we were crazy for having such a long engagement, but we were able to save more money for the wedding, really shop around for the perfect vendors and we’ve never once been stressed because we’ve had so much time to plan.

I would do it the same way all over again.

Post # 12
22 posts
  • Wedding: October 2014

When we get married it will be a 22 month engagement. We both graduate next spring and we wanted to be done with school before we get married. We knew awhile ago that we would get married (we have been together 4 years and knew about 2 months in) so for me it will feel more like a five year engagement.

I like having the extra time to figure things out and plan and research. And I know that October 2014 will be here in a flash (we’ve been engaged 4 months already and it feels like yesterday when he proposed!)

Post # 13
513 posts
Busy bee

I didn’t think I would like the idea of a long engagement at all, but we’re having a 20-month engagement and honestly, I LOVE it. I love being engaged, having time to plan things, relax, research vendors. It’s awesome. Time has already flown by, and I know once this October comes it’s going to get crazy.

Post # 14
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014


I’m a September 2014 bride. 7 months into a 23 month engagement. I paid a deposit on our DJ last week and I am so glad we are taking the time to pay our vendors slowly and start our marriage without the debt! Other days, I’ll turn to my Fiance and say “Lets get married right meow.” and try for the next hour to get him to agree to elope. 

Then I remember that I want to walk down the aisle in my beautiful dress (yes, I already bought that with 16 months to go yet) surrounded by friends and family and see my handsome man waiting for me at the end of the aisle. 


Some days it flies, other days I’m impatient. It’ll all be worth it when the day comes! 

Post # 15
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

We got engaged in August 2011 and aren’t getting married until October 2014….It was originally 2013 but I’m glad we pushed it back because it definitely gives us time to save and plus we had a few issues we needed to sort through but yeah some days I’m just like gosh! i wish we were getting married sooner only because we don’t live together right now and are waiting until we are married so yeah! 

Post # 16
28 posts
  • Wedding: October 2014



I’m a touch embarassed to say that we’re having a 27-month engagement. Fiance is finishing his PhD and we didn’t want to stress him any more than was really necessary. I’m also the only one earning any income so it was originally (before his mother insisted on paying for the venue & food) important for us to have a longer period of time to save money.

It’s kind of sad that my family and friends aren’t as gungho on helping with plans because things are so far out, but I’m a very organized person so it’s nice to have a lot of time to sift through all of the vendors (hello one cake tasting per month for like 4 months in a row!) and make giant lists of things to do. 

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