Post # 1
I recently went out to dinner with my maid of honor and one of my bridesmaid’s. At dinner my bridesmaid was very rude and mean to me. I do not have a relationship with my father and it is for the better that I do not and all of my friends know that. At dinner my bridesmaid asked me why I do not have a relationship with my father and then she told me that she saw and talked to my father. She then proceeded to ask me more questions and would keep looking at her phone ask me a question then send a text and repeat this for a little bit longer until I just stopped answering her questions. My miad of honor tried to change the subject but she would not let the subject be changed. After she realized I was not answering she let it go. I then brought up some things I was looking at for my wedding. I showed them some dresses I was looking at and different color ideas. My maid of honor was very interested and gave me some feedback but my bridesmaid was more interested in her phone. She gave no feed back for anything. After that evening I have started to question her being in my bridal party and even benig a friend. Am I right in this thinking or am I overreacting?
Post # 3
so i’m reading this and thinking that your BM was asking you questions and feeding information to your dad?
I’m curious why she would do this? I don’t want to get personal but is this a rift that she thinks should/could be fixed?
Post # 4
@tk2013: what the hell, she saw and talked to your Dad? Sounds like she’s crossing some boundaries here.
Post # 5
@MsGinkgo: I think that she thinks that it something that should be fixed.
Post # 6
@Peachytalk: Yeah, +1
@tk2013: Whaaat?? I also don’t speak to my dad and would tell anyone who argued with me about it to GO TO HELL. F that ishhh. Usually for me it only takes a couple of examples as to WHY, and they shut right up. I mean, girls don’t cut their dads out of their lives for no reason. I would probably tell her straight up that she’s out of line.
Post # 7
@tk2013: No your not … I also no longer have contact with my father he is toxic to me … the fact it seems like she was telling him what you were saying to me the way you explained it seems like she was asking questions for him and replying to him with what you were saying
you are a bride, you should be happy and only surround your self with positive people who respect you i do not feel like she respects you or your feelsing i dont know about you and your father but for me i tend to get emo and become a reck if i talk about him to much it all hurts alot still the things he did
its not fair to hound you on things like that i would not have her be part of my day at all … the friendship may be fixable if she is willing to understand but i wouldnt talk ti out til after the wedding keep in the happy vibes dont let ppl who bring you down in your inner group def not your party
Post # 8
@tk2013: So i think you totally have a right to be pissed. It sounds to me like she’s trying to help your dad work his way back in to your life. I think you need to have a sit down with this BM and tell her that while you appreciate her apparent concern you are currently not ready/prepared/willing to repair your relationship with your father. You have X reasons and right now you need her to support your decision or you will have to distance yourself as you do not want her feeding information to your father.
Post # 9
@tk2013: Maybe you should talk to her and fill her in on your side of the story. At present she has only heard one side from your father and your reaction/actions are possibly supporting his side of the story.
I wouldn’t automatically jump to she was feeding him information via text during your dinner. As rude as she was for doing that you have no proof that she was texting your dad. She might have been texting her partner, or something to do with work or another friend that was having a cisis etc etc.