Post # 1
Okay, so I’ve been confused by something for awhile, and I was wondering if someone could clear this up for me. I feel like women often say on this website that “I’m taking his name, but continuing to use my maiden name professionally.” I’m confused by this because a) I’ve never met anyone who has actually done this, and b) it seems difficult logistically. Any career which requires a license (teacher, doctor, real estate agent, lawyer, etc.) requires that you practice under your legal name. Any contracts you sign (on behalf of your work or otherwise) have to be under your legal name. If you apply for a grant, it has t be under your legal name. Your paycheck and taxes have to be under your legal name. How does one continue using their maiden name professionally?
I’m intrigued by the option, again, but don’t understand the logistics. As an attorney, I imagine this just isn’t an possibility for me, correct? Any help from someone who has actually done this?
Post # 3
I’m a teacher and plan to continue using my maiden name at school. All the students know me as Ms. XX and I’m not trying to confuse everyone by changing my name in the middle of a school year. Obviously, all my legal documents, license, payroll, etc.. will have my married name, but I will just still be called by my maiden name.
Post # 4
Hm, I always took it as the woman is not going to change her name legally, but will answer to her husband’s last name socially. I’m probably reading it wrong since that’s what I will do. I am not a professional yet- just would have SS, driver’s license and credit cards to change and I am too lazy for that, plus I really don’t want to change it! 🙂 So, I’m not, but everyone will probably call me Mrs. HisName and I won’t correct them.
Post # 5
I work in aviation as a licensed professional. After we are married I will add his name and have two last names – Mrs. Hislast Mylast. My workplace correspondence, email, documents, paperwork will continue to have my maiden last name only, while payroll and other HR related material will show both last names. I had to check with my HR and uppermanagement and they have said this is okay because I will have both last names legally and can therefore use just one. Not sure how it works in other careers but I am curious to hear more from others.
Post # 6
Ditto, I thought it was more of an “i will respond to Mrs. So and So” in person, but all their professional documents (and therefore their actual name, as it’s on their soc sec card, etc) will maintain their maiden name.
I think it just means they will actually respond to “Mrs. Hislast name” versus a friend of mine who corrects people and says, “no, I’m still ____” and inserts her last name b/c she didn’t take his name, not even socially.
Post # 7
I’m bewildered by this, too! Thanks for asking. I’m a lawyer and want to keep my maiden name professionally, but keep thinking I’d like to be introduced at our wedding as “Mr. and Mrs. HisLast,” so what to do? I guess it makes the most sense to keep my name on all the important documents and just not stress about what people call me outside of work.
Post # 8
I changed my name with payroll to FirstName HisLastName, but I go by FirstName MaidenName HisLastName when I introduce myself to colleagues. Also, my email address is [email protected] (name of company). Luckliy, I don’t have to be licensed with the state for my job 🙂
Post # 9
My aunt did this. She is legally First Maiden HisLast but since she got married after being established in her career, she only goes by her maiden name. She already had her liscences in her maiden name (Insurance/Notary) and because it is still part of her legal name it is okay. All of her clients call her by her maiden name and it is the only one in her work email. She has been married for 20 years and continued to use her maiden name only. When they do formal things together and socially she will answer to Mrs. HisLast but mostly everyone still uses her last when addressing her. I am not sure what her passport looks like but I would guess it, along with her liscence have both names because legally she is both names. Hope that helps to clearify.
Post # 10
On my marriage license it says “Anyone can choose to go by any name as long as its used consistantly and without intent to defraud.” I too am not changing my name, but plan on going by Mrs. HisName socially. What I was wondering was if I could have MyFirst HisLast displayed on, say, our joint bank account checks, or our credit cards. I don’t know how to go about finding out if this is doable.
I would imagine, like a few others, that those who will go by their birth name professionally plan on not changing their names legally.
Post # 11
I changed my name to First Maiden HisLast. So professionally I still sign off with my maiden name but every where else, I go by Mrs. So-and-so. But not being licenced by the state gives you a lot of leeway
Post # 12
I’ve been wondering about this topic also. I’ve thought about be first, middle, mylast, hislast officially and usinf my first, middle, mylast for work and socially first, middle, hislast. My big problem is the name I go by is a double name that is partialy drived from my middle name. Argh.
Post # 13
I’m defintiely changing my name, for one it’s nice to be married and take a guy’s name
second its a change in status, he feels hurt with me bringing up I was thinking of keeping my name
Post # 14
I am going to change my name but I am not going to change it at work. People already mispronounce my maiden name a lot so I don’t feel like having them trying to pronounce his last name which is Polish and has lots of W’s and Z’s in it.
Post # 15
Thanks for bringing this up, ladies! I’m also planning on being First Mylast Hislast, but continuing to use Mylast professionally. We both have long names, so it just looks ridiculous otherwise! (I’m a journalist and my byline would be too long to even fit on one line!) To be sure – Do I or don’t I have to change my SS card, bank accounts, etc. if I keep my last name, too? And do I have to change my signature? I’m really unclear on the legality of all this!
Post # 16
I have thought so much about this! I am a lawyer and I had a few concerns. What if I don’t change my name and my kids have different last names and people always assume my last name is his and its a hassle? What if I do change my name and my friends/colleagues don’t know about the wedding? Here is my current idea.
First Middle MyLast HisLast. But instead of having 2 last, make my current last my second middle. So officially I’ll just be First HisLast and that’s how I’ll go socially. But professionally I’ll go by First MyLast HisLast. I figure that way I’ll be easy to find me no matter how I’m known 🙂
I’m a lawyer btw so being “google-able” is very important.