Using old rings? Am I being cheap?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
7265 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

I probably wouldn’t use the same ring, but I see nothing wrong with using the same stone in a different setting. I don’t think that would be cheap, I think it’s smart!

Post # 4
Member
1207 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@habibti:  maybe not cheap..let’s say practical instead. However I think you have to take yor SOs feelings into consideration, and it sounds like he’s not thrilled with this idea. is it his first time getting engaged? Maybe he’s looking forward to presenting you with a ring that he chooses. I guess if he wants you to have a gift from him, you should let him. Save your old ring for one of your kids. Good luck

Post # 6
Member
7098 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If I was your BF I wouldn’t want to be reminded of your ex every time I saw your ring.

 

Post # 7
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

What does an engagement ring mean to you?  If any part of it is a symbol of your love for the other person and that it’s a promise to get married to said person….it seems inappropriate that you would reuse the one you had when you were with your ex.

However, if a ring is just a ring and you don’t mind that’s a different story.  Your FI doesn’t seem all that thrilled though – I would just have him make you a similar ring since you clearly like the style

Post # 8
Member
1207 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@habibti:  I think he may want to have his moment presenting you with his ring. In his mind it might not be special enough using a ring from your ex, especially since you said you bought it. Let your man buy you a gift 🙂

Post # 9
Member
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Yes, this is weird. I would not want to wear the old ring, and if I were your FI, I wouldn’t want you wearing it, either.

Post # 10
Member
2783 posts
Sugar bee

@habibti:  I think that if you paid for it and you like it, who cares. I’ve thought to myself, what if we ever split and I get engaged again…I’d want the exact same ring I have now. Who cares, it’s a ring. 

Post # 11
Member
3596 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Yeah I think you are being unfair to him. It’s a new marraige get a new ring. Think of it this way, how would you feel if your boyfriend brought you a engagement ring he had given another women or  his ex wife?

 

 

 

Post # 13
Member
1779 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 1997

@habibti:  take the diamond out and allow him to reset it for you. That will appease your frugalness and his desire for you to have a special ring from him.

Post # 14
Member
476 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@habibti:  I say yes  use your ring, if he is comfortable.  I was married before and I paid for the wedding bands.  When it was over I took them.  I used his to finance some jewelry.  And I will be weaing mine with some alterations.  I would wear them just as they are but I don’t want them to be exactly the same for the reasons that your BF mentioned, other people.  Also, my engagement ring is millegrained so adding it to my band will make it a little more matchy matchy, which I used to be against.  However, if my hunny was uncomfortable I would simply get new bands.  I spent too much to have custom jewelry sititng in my armoire so I would try to do a trade in which gets you more value than trying to get cash for it.  I hope everything works out!  Good luck!

Post # 15
Member
1170 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2002

@habibti:  If he wants to buy you a ring, maybe you could let him use your old ring and trade up at a jewelry store and get a similar style, just bigger or upgrade in quality. 🙂

Post # 16
Member
6407 posts
Bee Keeper

Normally I wholeheatedly recommend the practical, but in cases of “divorce rings” I think the symbolsm being all wrong makes them an impractical decision. The fact that it is from your own divorce would make me side even more strongly with your SO on this one: any ring but that one!

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