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I'm curious about this too. I'm planning on sending out a traditional RSVP to the older generation, but I would love to save on some postage and do an online RSVP.
We did this. We didn't get that many responses this way either. We also put a phone number down for the "older generation". We had a lot of people tell us by word of mouth, email, and facebook whether they were coming.
i did traditional rsvp for the un-tech savvy (usually older or traditional)--about 10 parties. The others had to rsvp online-about 140 parties . About 10 people had tech problems in general. On my site (weddingtracker-which is just ok), the guests had a drop down menu to select number of people coming. This was based on the number i inputted and they could not drop down any further than the max i set. That was very nice.
You'll probabgly want to test it with a cousin or someone who is computer literate and someone who is not so much way ahead of time to figure out if there are any quirky things with the rsvp so you can add some helpful directions to the text if needed.
Here's another trick...wait til close to the end, check off your list with who rsvp'd and email everybody who didn't to remind them 5 days before the deadline. You'll get a lot back that way.
We used our website (through weddingwindow.com) for our RSVPs and it worked out well. I'd heard about the surprise additions, so on the part of the website where guests RSVPed, I wrote "kindly limited to the individuals listed on your invitation" that way it was polite, but explicitly clear, DON'T RSVP ANYONE WE DIDN'T SPECIFICALLY INVITE.
We didn't have any surprise guests, so it was success in my mind :)
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I've read so many posts about people adding guests to the reply cards. I had no idea people did this until I started planning and reading posts here. Totally crazy rude in my book.
We were planning on using our website for RSVPs and I was thinking that this is a good way to avoid any unwanted additional guests being added. As far as I can tell, the website requires someone to put in their name and then they see the events they are invited to and they can RSVP. There seems to be no way someone could add anyone.
Can any of you who've used your website for RSVPs comment? Did it work out well? Did you have any surprise addtions?