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I really, really, really want my wedding to be vegetarian. My FI is a meat lover, although he sometimes says he wants to go veg for the health benefits. We've been together for 4 years, and it has not been an issue until lately. I cook for both of us, and usually cook separate meals.
We're having a (non-wedding related) BBQ in a couple of days. I proposed a vegetarian menu, and some of our friends made a couple of jokes. FI insisted there should be meat, and I have to admit I caved pretty quickly. People were like, "There has to be meat at a BBQ."
I'm wondering if there's going to be a similar attitude toward our wedding reception. As a non-vegetarian wedding guest (or a guest at a party of any kind) would you put up a fuss if the food was vegetarian?
if more than half the guests were vegetarian, fine.
would you consider vegetarian option + meat option?
Um...I would be disappointed for a no meat BBQ, but a vegetarian wedding= no disappointment. I think some really traditional meat and potato people might notice, but good food is good food. But if your fiance wants to serve meat, I would consider offering both types of dishes.
Why do you want to have an all veggie wedding?
I think I may be a little disappointed with a veggie wedding only because I don't eat cheese and most vegetarian options have quite a bit of cheese in them!
Would you be willing to compromise with two main options a veggie and a meat?
I'm also vegetarian, and my FH is not. He doesn't eat meat that often because it's easier for us, but he does enjoy meals with meat!
With that said, I'm against an all-vegetarian wedding. I know of only five of our guests (including myself) that are vegetarians. Most meat eaters enjoy eating meat, and I don't see a point in forcing over 95% of our guests and my FH to "be" vegetarians for our wedding. So, we're having a meat option and a vegetarian option. There is no difference in price for the meat and veggie options... and people will be happier with the meat option!
It's not something I would have done, even if I were a vegetarian only because I know my family is full of picky eaters-- meat eaters lol My brothers will eat almost no veggies at all! I would hate for my family to leave hungry because they don't like what's being served. Granted you can't please everyone, but for me, vegetarian only would disappoint the majority. Is there something you can compromise on? If you're having a cocktail hour or something, could that be all veggetarian? People would be less likely to notice and then you can offer just a meat option and vegetarian maybe and people can pick as they see fit. Good luck!
I eat a mainly vegetarian diet. I was vegan for awhile but I couldn't seem to get all of my minerals. Iron pills do not work for me; I get sick. So I caved and I eat meat every couple of months or when I begin to get anemia symptoms.
My problem with meat is that many Americans overconsume it. That is damaging our whole world and the world's ecosystem. Rainforests are burned down to make room for low-grade grazing areas. I have travelled to the rainforest and I saw the devestation. The developing nations cannot afford to leave the rainforests alone. Also, because there is a demand for meat and animal products, farmers add hormones to keep up with that demand. That is bad for us to ingest!
Yet, if we lived like people in the 50's, we would eat red meat maybe twice a week and at celebrations. That's how people once did it. Then we wouldn't need steroids, antibiotics, and hormones to keep up with demand. We wouldn't need to destroy the rainforest to make room for grazing land. We wouldn't need to put chickens and other animals in horrible conditions to keep up with demand. It's simple economics.
That being said, what are your reasons for not eating meat? Think hard about it. You still cook your fiance meat, so you can't be so militant in your beliefs. I personally think that if more people switched to a vegetarian diet even some of the time, it would make the world a better place. It could start at your wedding.
Or you can make your wedding a time for a natural celebration and eat the fatted calf.
I went to an Armenian wedding and the bride was vegetarian. On each table was a ton of mediterranean vegetarian cuisine. We were full before they started passing out the meat! We didn't even need it!
If you want to comprimise, do one animal one veggie. It will be great no matter what you choose.
I am using your question to state my beliefs. Thanks for reading this.
I have been a pisco-vegetarian for many years, so I guess that my opinion isn't really what you're looking for, but I'll offer it anyway. I can understand that people think it odd to have a meat-free BBQ. A wedding reception, however, probably wouldn't be that big of a deal, as long as you serve things that are what I like to call "regular vegetarian." In other words, tofurky may not go over well, but a pasta dish probably wouldn't be noticed because many carnivores regularly eat vegetarian pasta. If both you and you FH want a vegetarian menu, go for it.
I think that as long as you don't make a big deal about it, people won't even notice. I mean, don't serve mock chicken or veggie burgers, just do a veggie pasta dish, or a vegetable napoleon, etc. There are loads of classy dishes that don't have meat, and as long as you don't point it out, it's possible people won't care.
I'm a carnivore, but the best wedding food I've had (besides ours, hee hee!) was an all-vegetarian reception at a vegetarian restaurant in San Francisco. As long as the food is yummy and hearty (i.e. not just a mixed plate of raw veggies), I think people will probably be fine with it. A few may grumble, but if the food is good enough, they'll get over it and chow down. My husband didn't even notice our friends' reception was all vegetarian!
BBQs are a bit of a different thing than a dinner at a wedding reception, I think. When I think of a BBQ, my mind immediately goes to burgers and hot dogs and steak, and to be honest, I'd be a bit disappointed if I showed up to a BBQ hungry for a burger and found out it was all-vegetarian instead. I've tried a few veggie burgers and haven't liked them, and while I do love grilled veggies, they don't quite satisfy my burger cravings. I wouldn't be disappointed to show up to "a dinner" and find out it was vegetarian, but a vegetarian BBQ probably would throw me a bit.
i always joke that im weary of any person who cant appreciate a good piece of meat, but i just say that to be silly. in reality I don't think I'd care if it was a veg wedding. All that matters is that if you are serving a dinner, be sure to ahve them substantially portioned and filling.
I'm definitely a meat-eater and it's not a BBQ without burgers! To be honest, I don't eat many full meals besides breakfast that have absolutely no meat. However, a wedding with pasta or something else where we usually don't miss the meat sounds great to me. If you've got your heart set on a veggie wedding, I think that's a good way to please both crowds.
The reason I want a vegetarian wedding is primarily because I feel *really* strongly about not killing animals.
I try not to be judgmental about what other people eat. Like I said, I cook meat for FI. I'm having more and more of a problem with it as time wears on, though. Truthfully, I don't want to cook meat anymore, and I don't want to serve it in my home.
Sometimes it just comes down to laziness. It is *really* hard to consistently cook vegetarian meals that please a die-hard meat lover. Trust me, I've been trying for years. FI loves some veggie things, hates others. Sometimes wants to be vegetarian, sometimes wants a big steak.
The other problem is that I want people to enjoy our wedding. I'm pretty sure our venue's meat/seafood options beat the vegetarian options hands down. Our reception will be at a hotel in Honolulu, and there are so many gorgeous Hawaiian seafood dishes that I kind of hate for people to miss out on. Even if I don't want to eat them myself.
Basically it's a toss-up between my beliefs vs. better food and the comfort level of the guests. Sigh...
So why don't you and your fiance cook together? Like he cooks his meat for dinners that include it? I don't think its fair to now ask him to stop eating meat in your home and around you since you didn't stand up against it before, but I think that he could at least cook it himself. And get him to help you find new recipes to try. I know when we tried to eat vegetarian style, it was hard to diversify our meals and still enjoy them.
Do most of the people around you know about your beliefs? If your friends and family know your objections, then I think they could muster one vegetarian meal. Its not like this will be their only meal in Honolulu and they can enjoy the local cuisine on their own time right?
I admit, I would not be thrilled to discover only vegetarian options would be available, especially if said options were not super tasty. My FI hates a lot of vegetables. If we were at a vegetarian wedding, we'd probably leave starving. I could see us at the hotel bar with appetizers.
Pfft. I'm a happy cranivore who takes in a great many calories in animal proteins each day. That said, I don't NEED to eat meat at every meal. There are LOTS of delicious vegetarian means to be had.I say go for it, but be smart about your menu choices.
A few years ago I was a guest at a vegetarian wedding. They served heaps of grilled vegetables (yum) and a big lentil dish and it was fabulous. I didn't pine for meat or feel cheated out of meat dishes and I had plenty toeat. It was great. What I really remember about that wedding is not the absence of meat, but the absence of red wine. Their venue only permitted white wine, not red. I was disgruntled about the wine but perfectly happy to eat a meal that satisfied the ethical stance of my hosts.
Do it!
I was once vegan and although veggie meals can be very very yummy - i would prefer a meat option, especially as i know hubby would be telling me that he will be getting a pizza on the way home as he would still be hungry
I wouldn't be disappointed, and being the guest I wouldn't say anything....but it would have to be some pretty amazing and filling food for me to be happy! I would imagine you might get some comments and reactions from people only because not everyone knows how to keep their mouth shut when necessary.
As long as you have enough substantial food and a large variety, I think you can serve whatever you want to. It's your wedding! But you should be prepared to hear some tongues wag. It might be tough if your FI doesn't feel the same way. Would you mind serving fish?
There is NO problem with a vegetarian wedding! There are soooo many great dishes the caterer can make without having meat. I would not mind in the least bit if I went to a wedding like this (and I am not vegetarian). And you said that you "really really really" want YOUR wedding to be vegetarian, I mean, it's your wedding!
But a BBQ would be a little weird with no meat, not gonna lie.
I see a lot of comments worried about a plate of all veggies, here are some menu items that I can think of off the top of my head that are delicious and vegetarian: Mozzarella with a balsamic drizzle, a great tortellini pasta, pumpkin soup with a dollop of yogurt in the middle, a really great salad with homemade croissants and goat cheese, Portobello burgers, eggplant parm, fancy mac and cheese. Stuffed mushrooms, an amazing cheese platter… I can go on.
I'm a vegetarian, I'm not having a vegetarian wedding and I would NEVER have a vegetarian BBQ. I also don't cook 2 meals a night - goodness, you need to be nicer to yourself :) If Fi wants meat, he can cook it himself. Sure, last night I made a vegie pasta and dumped a tin of tuna into his, but that's hardly cooking two meals. Tonight we're having sausages - meat for him, vegie for me. But otherwise he knows he will eat what he's given. He knows the benefits of being vegetarian but he does like to get his meat when we go out. I'd encourage you to stop making yourself do so much!! It's not good for you and negates a lot of the reasons you are vegetarian :)
As a meat eater, I wouldn't be opposed to a vegetarian wedding. My only plea would be that not everything is covered in cheese. Above a handful of yummy veg options were recommended and 7 of her suggestions invoved cheese!! Ick.
Cheese is great, but in moderation!
I have to ask: why are you so set on having a vegetarian menu? You said you cook different meals in the house & your FI eats meat-- so why are you thinking of having an all vegetarian meal? I just don't get it!
Anyway, its your day-- you can choose the menu, but if your FI likes meat why can't he enjoy the meal too & have some meat?!
@RecessionanistaBride
ha! I did not even realize they almost all had cheese! I do believe I have a cheese eating tapeworm inside me.
@Miss Pizzelle: lol thats funny! Despite what I wrote, I love cheese & those dishes sound totally delicious. I just don't think I could handle a 5 course cheese menu! :P
People get really rude about being "forced" to have a vegetarian meal, but given that you have strong feelings against meat I kind of think you should go for it. I don't eat beef (or any mammals). My husband does. But I didn't want to serve it at our wedding...he was okay with that. Yes he will occasionally (like 3 times in a year) make a steak on our grill, but he respects my views. And if you are completely opposed to killing animals for food, then don't have your wedding meal be about that.
Okay, I'm Indian so I really don't understand why people make such a big deal about vegetarian food. There are plenty of options that are not just steamed broccoli. But regardless, whatever you do some people will find something to complain about...so I say let 'em deal and do what makes sense for you. And though I do eat fish and poultry, people could really learn to get over their opposition to vegetarianism (it won't kill you, heck, it'll probably help you live longer).
It wouldn't bother me at all to have a vegetarian wedding meal. Just make sure you have a variety of options, and as said before, not everything covered in dairy/cheese!
As long as there was good food I'd be okay with it. Not just a sloppy fettuccini alfredo or some crappy bean dish, though. I'm imagining some very bad vegetarian entrees i've had in the past. If it's done beautifully and yummy, I see no reason why anybody would even notice! Pasta con broccoli comes to mind when it's done RIGHT. Since you'd be saving money by not serving meat, you could offer another dessert items, maybe. That would be pretty cool. =]
If you want a good steak, go to a steakhouse, IMO. A wedding usually isn't the place for fabuloso meat, at least any i've been to.
Good luck converting your FI to only meat, though, unless he shares your particular beliefs (besides health reasons). Sometimes people just like them some meat! I think mine would kill me, even though I try to stick to a mostly vegetarian diet with some lean proteins. I eat red meat very rarely and chicken maybe like, once a week. Turkey even less.
That being said, YOU shouldn't have to cook his meat. He should cook his own!
BTW, does seafood count as meat to you? I know some 'vegetarians' who only eat seafood
I really really wanted a vegetarian wedding, even though I do eat some seafood. Part of the reason was totally selfish - I wanted to prove to our friends and family that meat wasn't necessary to having a delicious meal. A lot of them are really judgmental of me and when FI and I moved in together, at least 10 people asked him, all concerned, "but what are you going to eat?" He lived and cooked on his own for 3 years before we moved in together, so I don't know why people got all worried that I wouldn't "let" him eat meat. I cook most of the time, but he'll often add some chicken or ground beef or bacon to his meal, and when we go out he almost always gets a meat dish.
We finally compromised on having a vegetarian and seafood menu, and on having all vegetarian hors d'oeuvres, because I hate having to ask "what's in this" of anything where it isn't obvious, and I don't want to not be able to eat any of the wonderful food that we are paying a lot for.
As a guest, I've been to a vegetarian wedding before. Since I was a vegetarian, it didn't bug me at all, and none of the other guests complained. As long as whatever you are serving is substantial enough that your guests are full, and you have a good source of protein (maybe a risotto with beans in it? or a vegetarian lasanga with tofu instead of ricotta), anyone who complains is just rude.
As a meat eater, I personally wouldn't be upset about a vegetarian reception because I don't have to eat meat everyday or at every meal. I eat red meat maybe twice a week. And I love veggies, pasta's, and salads and anything with cheese gets my vote. But I also live in farm country and I know a lot of people would be disappointed to not even have a chicken dish and tofu anything would not cut it.
I think it depends on your guests. You'll need a variety of good dishes. Maybe you and your fiance can look through some vegetarian recipes together and come up with a good plan.
I had an all vegetarian wedding. It went over really well. We did have meat at our rehearsal dinner. In my case, it was something DH and I wanted to do together and it is an ethical preference for us. I can understand you being torn if he eats meat.
I didn't expect my mom to support this because she doesn't help me make vegetarian meals when I visit her (like she'll throw bacon grease in the green beans) but she said that if ever I should serve everyone a vegetarian meal it would be at my wedding. Nobody complained, and our food was really good. Only 2 of our dishes included cheese.
I'm really shocked to read these responses that say they would object to a vegetarian menu. I hope your guests are more respectful of your choice, whatever you do. After all, it's just one meal that's provided to them; they'll have other opportunities to try the local animals.
I would definitely stay away from classic vegetarian foods like tofu. Not everyone will like it, I promise. People who aren't vegetarian who have never had it before will see it/taste it immediately (it has its own texture and people do know it's in there!) and not eat their plate. Stay away from tofu and "meat" substitutes or anything heavy on the mushrooms. IMO (just from waiting tables for years), those are things people love or hate and are hot button food items
Stick to "safe" foods =]. Maybe come back and ask us our vegetarian preference when you get the caterer's list!
it's ok to have a completely vegetarian meal if it's delicious. do you have a caterer with vegetarian expertise? if you supplement with things like mushrooms and heartier vegetables your guests may not miss it. of course, it also depends on what your guests are like - if they don't even like vegetables with their meat, then it might be tough to execute.
ejs is right tho - not everyone eats mushrooms. also a lot of vegetarian dishes seem to come with cheese - are any of your guests lactose intolerant?
you mentioned your FI eats meat though - would he be ok having a vegetarian reception? it's his wedding too.
Honestly, I would offer both. I've been to a wedding that was 100% VEGAN (so even more restricted than vegetarian) and it was honestly odd. There were about 10 vegans in a group of about 75 people. They loved it, but a huge group of us honestly left at one point and went to White Castle to get some food. I would have appreciated an option at least.
At our wedding we had a mix of about 20 vegan/ vegetarians in a crowd of approx 115, so we had the regular wedding meal with meat, and then a vegan stirfry for those who didn't eat meat. It was appreciated by all and the cost difference to have that option was very minimal.
I agree with some of the others - if the wedding is more than 50% vegetarians, then go for it, but otherwise, give an option. People will be happier
I eat meat, but I would be totally fine with a vegetarian meal. I think there are so many great options that you can really do a lot of delicious things without meat. There's an awesome vegetarian restaurant in my town and I go there often because the food is great.
Personally, I'd focus on veggies and pastas and try to avoid Tofu and meat-like products. A lot of those meat-substitutes are different texturally and might be off-putting for people. I'd rather eat a delicious butternut squash ravioli or mushroom pasta than Tofurkey!
Personally, I'm a very picky eater, and dislike most veggies. The ones I don't dislike I'm allergic to. I realize I'm not the norm, but I wouldn't be able to eat if there isn't meat.
Offer a variety of vegetarian dishes? I think that'd be your best, "safe" option. Vegetables are harder to get people to like besides your standard "grilled chicken with mashed potatoes and carrot medallion" entree.
I'm hungry so I'm trolling the food boards 
Along the lines of stuff people have said before, I think you should also avoid things that scream I AM A VEGETARIAN ENTREE! lol
But yeah, for a lot of non-veggie people that can be an instant turn-off. (I'm not sure that that's the word I'm looking for, but it's close). I think if it's an assortment of 'regular' dishes, people won't even notice.
I see absolutely no problem with a veggie wedding. At all. My FI is a vegetarian, and I am not (but I only eat seafood and the occasional steak at a steakhouse).
I can see why some people would have cracked jokes about a vegetarian BBQ, though. I think BBQ automatically implies meat for most people, so I can see where that was coming from. But a vegetarian wedding? I don't think people will be at all upset. Just offer really tasty options and no one will even give it a second thought. If people do, well, you can't please everyone, right?
I say as long as your FI is okay with it, then go for it.
I see no problem with a veggie wedding IF the food is good-quality and if there's enough variety to please everyone. I think if you have a good caterer it should be easy to do an all-vegetarian menu well. But that said, I HAVE been to an all-vegetarian wedding that I didn't think was done well. It was a buffet with mostly grilled veggies, cheese cubes, crudites, hummus and pita, etc, and everyone was starving because there wasn't much to choose from that was actually filling. I don't think anyone was bothered by the lack of meat, just the lack of substance and variety. If they had had a selection of pastas, stir fry dishes, things like that that are real "meals" and not just snacks and vegetables, I bet no one would have complained a bit. Also, I agree with everyone else that if you're going this route, you should choose familiar foods like pasta, eggplant parm, things that people will recognize, and stay FAR away from anything with tofu or other meat substitutes.
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