(Closed) Vendors. Should you deal with people you know???

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
1636 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@SoontobeMsL: My family has a moto ” never do business with friends or family” It usually ends up biting you in tush! and you could lose good friends over it.

Post # 4
Member
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My FI has worked with his family his whole life and has seen all the drama that results with employing friends and relatives.  As a point, we have a strict policy for the wedding…. “NO FRIENDS OR FAMILY DOING ANYTHING FOR THE WEDDING”

Post # 5
Member
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I got into trouble by deciding to hire a friend to help with wedding planning, long story short – it did not go well, we are not friends anymore.

Post # 6
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

My really good friend’s boyfriend has DJ equipment and said he would be happy to be the DJ for our wedding. I’m really nervous because I haven’t seen him perform anywhere but he has shown me pictures and it looks like everything we need is there. We really don’t have another 600 bucks to spend on a real DJ and this helps a lot.

Post # 7
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think it’s totally fine to explain, nicely, that you decided to go with a different florist. If she is a professional, she won’t let it affect her relationship with your FI.

I’m having at least three “friendors.”  My best friend from college is designing and making my dress; another college friend is designing/making my invites; and a family friend is doing the photography.  I’ll be honest, there are definitely moments I’m a little anxious about the dress and the pictures.  (I’m not at all worried about the invites, because she has an MFA in printmaking and her style really suits me.)  With the dress, it’s only because she’s across the country from me, which makes fittings a challenge. But I trust her design sense and competence and I’ve seen other wedding dresses she’s made – they’re AMAZING.  With the photographer, I’m a little anxious because she’s only semi-pro. But I LOVE many of the pictures she’s taken over the years, and I think we’ll be more at ease with her than with a stranger.

So yeah. I think if it’s something that absolutely has to be perfect for you, I’d avoid going the friendor route, unless it’s someone you trust completely.  With the photography and the invites, I’m taking the attitude that it will probably be great, even if it’s not precisely what I envision. With the dress, it feels higher-stakes, but I’m so close to my friend that it’s easy to be honest with her about what I like and don’t like, and we’re making sure there will be plenty of time for fittings. (Via the mail at first and then in person closer to the wedding.)

Overall, although having friends participate can be complicated, I feel so lucky to have each of these three women take part in my wedding. I love all of them, and it makes the wedding feel even more personal and loving.

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