Post # 1
I’m curious to find out what people think about using people you know for vendors. Yes, you can get a great price but what if you aren’t satisfied with their work? Can you complain?
My FI recommended we use his friends who have a floral shop. The first meeting we had with them, they had no flowers to really show me. I’m a visual person and I need to see it so I can say “Yes, I like it” or “No, I don’t like it”. She said she would call me when she has the flowers in the store to show. In the mean time, because I wasn’t “impressed” I went and searched for another florist. I was totally impressed with #2 and she had so much to show me. Now florist #1 invited me back to the shop to see the centerpiece she created. Yes it was beautiful but it wasn’t what I wanted (I asked for very little greens and fillers and it was basically all greens and fillers). I know they friends of my fiance’s but I’m not happy with their work. How do I break it to them that I’m going with another florist? Should I stay away from people I know to use as vendors. I hate to upset people but this is my wedding and business is business.
Post # 3
@SoontobeMsL: My family has a moto ” never do business with friends or family” It usually ends up biting you in tush! and you could lose good friends over it.
Post # 4
My FI has worked with his family his whole life and has seen all the drama that results with employing friends and relatives. As a point, we have a strict policy for the wedding…. “NO FRIENDS OR FAMILY DOING ANYTHING FOR THE WEDDING”
Post # 5
I got into trouble by deciding to hire a friend to help with wedding planning, long story short – it did not go well, we are not friends anymore.
Post # 6
My really good friend’s boyfriend has DJ equipment and said he would be happy to be the DJ for our wedding. I’m really nervous because I haven’t seen him perform anywhere but he has shown me pictures and it looks like everything we need is there. We really don’t have another 600 bucks to spend on a real DJ and this helps a lot.
Post # 7
I think it’s totally fine to explain, nicely, that you decided to go with a different florist. If she is a professional, she won’t let it affect her relationship with your FI.
I’m having at least three “friendors.” My best friend from college is designing and making my dress; another college friend is designing/making my invites; and a family friend is doing the photography. I’ll be honest, there are definitely moments I’m a little anxious about the dress and the pictures. (I’m not at all worried about the invites, because she has an MFA in printmaking and her style really suits me.) With the dress, it’s only because she’s across the country from me, which makes fittings a challenge. But I trust her design sense and competence and I’ve seen other wedding dresses she’s made – they’re AMAZING. With the photographer, I’m a little anxious because she’s only semi-pro. But I LOVE many of the pictures she’s taken over the years, and I think we’ll be more at ease with her than with a stranger.
So yeah. I think if it’s something that absolutely has to be perfect for you, I’d avoid going the friendor route, unless it’s someone you trust completely. With the photography and the invites, I’m taking the attitude that it will probably be great, even if it’s not precisely what I envision. With the dress, it feels higher-stakes, but I’m so close to my friend that it’s easy to be honest with her about what I like and don’t like, and we’re making sure there will be plenty of time for fittings. (Via the mail at first and then in person closer to the wedding.)
Overall, although having friends participate can be complicated, I feel so lucky to have each of these three women take part in my wedding. I love all of them, and it makes the wedding feel even more personal and loving.
Post # 8
Thanks for the comments. My parents are paying for the larger portion of the wedding but my fiance and I are paying for the flowers. I know it seems a little childish but I am thinking of using the excuse that my parents offered to pay and want to use their own florst.
Also, I decided to have florist #1 do the centerpiece arrangements for my bridal shower. This way they wouldn’t loose our business completely.
Hope I’m not going to Hell!