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I would say you shouldn't care. If you're not close with this person, then don't stress if he doesn't want to be at the wedding. I would think your friend would be upset.. I would be PISSED if my husband told me he didn't want to go to a friend's wedding with me. But you really won't be affected by this, so don't stress. Think of it as less money out of your pocket.
while it is very kind of you to say that the boyfriends can hang out with you all for the 3 hours prior to the ceremony when you are taking photos, as a guest, i cannot imagine this would be all that much fun. if he himself is not a good friend of yours, i'd say don't worry about it.
Ya that's a good way of seeing it- less money out of my pocket. But I'm still annoyed. Ok moving on...
Yeah, I think you should let this go. One of my BMs RSVP'd just for 1 and when I asked why her FI wasn't coming she said that he just felt uncomfortable because he wouldn't know anyone. Honestly... I get it. And that's totally his choice. I hardly know him, so it's not like a good friend was refusing to come to our wedding. I would hate to think that someone was at my wedding and feeling uncomfortable. Put yourself in his position and you'll see that this is not a big deal at all.
@KIKI82: meh, I wouldn't worry about it. maybe he just doesn't LIKE weddings? (a lot of people don't...) I'd be more worried about how my friend was handling this news. if she's okay with it, let it slide. otherwise, offer her comfort.
just my thoughts...
I would say they are adults, leave it up to them. If they RSVP'ed saying he would come, intend on him coming and move forward as such. If they RSVP'ed with only one, obviously he isn't coming. I guess I would just ask her to let you know before the deadline of count for the venue so you can plan accordingly.
Thanks everyone! I have not even mentioned my feeling to her b/c I did not want to hurt her feelings. Knowing her, I think she does want him to go but she is very passive so probably wont say anything. Which is fine. I hope she just doesn't bail early b/c he's not there. Oh well!
my FI has only been to a few weddings with me over the years b/c of not knowing the people getting married or only having met them once and honestly, i think sometimes i have more fun without him b/c i don't have to worry about entertaining him, making sure he isn't bored/left out...i only miss him during the slow songs...don't fret about him not wanting to come...you'll have more fun with the people who you know want to be there!
@Ei: i totally agree! my guy usually opts out of weddings for my friends from high school, and that is fine because it ends up being a massive reunion and i'd worry about him feeling left out or the odd one out and require entertaining.
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So, I text my BM's asking them for the correct spelling for their BF's last names. One of my BM who has been my really good friend for over 12 years now tells me her BF is not sure he wants to come to the wedding. ??? His reason is because he will not know anyone there. Eww ok! First of all, I have told all my BM's to tell their BFs not to worry about being left alone for long periods of time, that they can hang out with us during picture time which is before the ceremony for like 3 hours! Plus there will be other BFs there that do not know anyone. For example, one of my BM BF is coming 6 hrs out of town to attend and he doesn't know anyone but still coming. Her BF lives like 10 min from the venue eeeh! Also, we are doing a sweetsheart table so no discomfort there!
I don't know! Maybe I'm just over annoyed by this and maybe I should not care!