- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014
While I understand and can appreciate that people constantly coming to you for advice and counsel is a big compliment, I feel like I’m 6 more “complaints” from a full-scale psychotic break.
There are two main offenders: my mom and my sweet boyfriend. Both are going through some legal issues, and both are relying heavily on me for advice and comfort. I’m seriously considering sending them both a bill.
Boyfriend: his issues are nothing major, but nonetheless I’ve been serving as Advice & Counsel. Issue #1 I’ve mentioned before on the Bee, is that he has a child support hearing coming up. It really isnt a big deal and I’m not concerned about the hearing itself. What IS bothering me is that I’ve been the one handling every single aspect of it: attorney, attorney general’s office, writing letters, copying w2s, etc. It’s not a lazy thing: he’s scared and doesnt know what to do. In the past when he’s been single and this kind of thing has come up, he’s just bent over and taken it because he didnt know HOW to go about these processes. He’s told me multiple times in the last 3 weeks how much he appreciates me taking the reigns on this and that he “wouldnt know where to even start” if I wasnt here. So at least my efforts are being acknowledged, but it’s still stressful. Issue #2 is his work. He is having alot of turmoil there, just your usual office BS, but I’m hearing about it all night after work. I know that he’s my other half and part of my job is to be the sounding board, but it’s just constant and he doesnt take a single bit of advice I give him. So every day it’s the same thing. I’m scared to even ask him how work was.
Mom: my mother is currently on her way out of her 5th marriage. In the past, she has come out on top of her divorces, but this husband is really making it tough for her. He was ordered by the judge to pay her an enormous sum of money in court a few weeks ago which he hasnt done, and has also defied the court order by stopping payment of the household bills. My mother is a “stay-at-home-wife” and with him draining the joint accounts with his new girlfriend and refusing to pay anything, she’s starting to go into the red. All day long, 5-6 days a week, I recieve long-winded texts from her and am expected to call her after work every day on my drive home to listen to her vent for upwards of an hour. Yesterday, she was in all-out meltdown mode and was sobbing because she’s hurt he’s wining and dining someone else AND because she’s contemplating selling some of her things just to pay her bills until court next week. Listening to it was unbearable, and I offered to give her back a ring she gave me (nothing sentimental, just a piece she didnt use) so she could sell it. The bummer is that the proceeds from this ring were going to go toward my engagement ring. Obviously, though, the situation she is in is alot more important and I got her to agree to take it.
So here’s how my day looks:
-Get to work. Try to do my job.
-Field texts all day from BF about how shitty work is and how sick of it he’s getting mixed in with texts from my mom about what her soon-to-be ex husband “the bastard” is up to.
-Text boyfriend trying to get information from him to pass along to attorney. 32% success rate.
-Call and email attorney for my boyfriend on my lunch break.
-Try to get work done I’ve missed while dealing with other issues. Promise mom via text i’ll call after work.
-Listen to my mother rant and rave my entire 45 minute drive home from work. Hang up from her when I pull up to the house. Take the dogs out.
-Boyfriend walks in the door and immediately starts in on his awful day.
Bees, I’m seriously about to lose it. I tried to talk to my boyfriend about this after work yesterday in the nicest way possible, and immediately following it he launches into bitching about work!! Right after I JUST told him that i’m getting so overwelmed dealing with everyone elses crap that I cant even have issues of my own!