- 4 years ago
For me it does. I’ve lived in cities my whole life, and no matter what I wear or do, men bother me on the street. A LOT, in scary ways. I’ve been followed home by a group of 8 drunk men (I was able to outwalk them because they were so drunk and duck into a convience store to call a cab), I’ve had men grope me on the street, I’ve been grabbed by a man who tried to pull me into a dark alley way (I kicked him in his shins and ran). I’ve had men slow down their cars and follow me down the street. This doesn’t even take into account the random cat calls I get constantly or the rude noises men sometimes make. Its not fun, its scary, particularly if its after dark.
I try to take cabs/drive everywhere after dark. I wear modest clothes when I’m by myself. It doesn’t help. I’ve been followed TWICE while wearing a very conservative Ann Taylor black business suit after work. I’ve been catcalled after a final exam while I was wearing old gym clothes that had been worn for several days. I was wearing no make up, and I hadn’t had a shower in days. I’m just sick of it! I should be able to wear what I want and walk down the street in peace.
Since being with my SO, I’ve been able to go where I want and wear what I want because he’s around. It I come home late at night, he will walk me back from the subway. I can finally wear low cut tops and miniskirts when I go out because men won’t bother me if I’m with him. But it effing pisses me off that I need a ‘man’ to protect me. I should be able to wear a miniskirt if I want or walk down the street after dark without being afraid, let alone in the middle of the day.
Last friday we went out to see a movie. It was super hot outside and I decided to wear a miniskirt and high heels. It was cute and, even though i thought it was a little skanky, the SO said I looked great. So I wore it. (Honestly, I wouldn’t have worn it if I was going out alone or with girls). On our walk back home, two men followed us for several blocks making kissy noises and rude sucking sounds. I was really nervous, even though my SO is 6’2 and muscular and the guys were unlikely to bother us. When we finally got to our building, I turned around to see if they were following us and they started making rude gestures and yelling at me. (I know I shouldn’t have turned around, but I didn’t want them to follow me into the building.)
I’m just SICK of it. I can’t go out without being bothered. It sucks. I just wish I could do what I want without having to worry about disgusting, male chauvanist pigs trying to hurt/bother/scare me. I shouldn’t have to change the way I dress so I’m less likely to be bothered by these cretins. I shouldn’t need to rely on my SO to keep me safe if I want to wear something that shows a little skin! Its summer for god sakes, why shouldn’t I be able to wear shorts or a miniskirt?
Just venting, I’m just so mad. Sometimes I just think being a girl sucks… Seriously bees, anyone else want to vent?