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@julies1949: I do; god help me I dont have enough anger to say this to her (I think I would still try to be diplomatic, even if Im angry! its just my way) but saying it here just allowed me to say how I really feel.
Thanks for the support
@Bellanouva: I really believe that people like this will be found out in the end for the tools that they are...and it's frustrating because you can never say or do anything because somehow YOU end up looking like the a-hole. I hope she gets "found out" soon. And that you're doing ok emotionally. *hugs* I have to get off weddingbee soon (damn job...lol), but I'll be sending good thoughts your way today :)
@kate169: Thank you so much, I really appreciate the good vibes, thoughts, and kind words kate. Im just hoping she smartens up! Or at least SOMEONE other than my SO stands up for me. What hurts the most? She convinced my parents that she was in the right all along and that I was being unreasonable-I overheard her talking to my dad, as usual he sided with her. Even my mother, who I adore sided with her. This is one of those moments I wish karma would hurry up and hand out some whoop ass lol. Emotionally I have moved on from denial, to sadness, and now Im enraged- so I guess thats an improvment?
Im just going to try and focus on the good :) tell me how your day goes, I hope it goes great btw!
@Bellanouva: I've read your other threads about your sister and all I can say is that I'm very sorry. It is heartbreaking when the people who are supposed to be the closest to you and care the most about you don't do any of those things.
I've had a similar situation with my dad, for years I tried so hard and I got so upset when we kept falling back into the same old patterns, it was like every time we talked I felt sure things were going to change and they never did. So I took a hard decision, I decided to stop wasting my energy on him and focus on the other fantastic people in my life. I didn't completely cut ties with him but I cut down contact to a few phone calls a year and I never once brought up emotions, the past or our relationship, just stayed on 'safe' topics. Now it's about 15 years later and things have actually finally started to improve, I don't know if it was the fact that once I was out of his life he started realizing something was wrong or just that over the years he's had time to sort himself out.
My advice would be to stay strong, don't completely cut your sister out but keep her at a distance. Don't bring up your relationship again but just treat her like you would a distant cousing you only see once a year. As for her being MOH, you need to do what feels right for you, there's no right or wrong answer to that question...
@Bellanouva: I'm so sorry about all this B.S. drama you're dealing with! You just have to ask yourself...what would JWOWW do??? :o)
I hope things get better for you and this terrible situation you've been through (with your sister no less!). And it's not fair for anyone, family or otherwise to choose sides. KARMA always makes herself known. Even if it really sucks waiting for her to show her ugly mug, she'll come through in the end.. If all else fails start slapping and grab yo-self a handful of hair extensions! 
(And I'm not trying to be uncompassionate, just trying to lift your spirits, if possible.)
Sorry Lady, I wish I could say something that would take the zing out of things for you. I will just send you good thoughts and internet *HUGS*
@The Unsuspecting Bride: Thank you so much for your story and for the kind words. I appreciate both alot. Its really difficult looking backwards and seeing how far me and my sister have come away from where we used to be, but I guess everyone grows up and sometimes they grow apart? I just keep thinking of this fantasy I had in my head of her being beside me to help plan our day, our wedding day. Now I see that the person I may have been turning to all along was my SO, not some dream I had about my sister. I think Im going to focus on the gift that is my relationship with someone who truly understands what it means to be family and a best friend.
@Mrs.tobe: LMAO! omg I totally needed a laugh. And your right! Jwoww would be like karma's angrier less patient sister opening a can a WHOOPASS with a side of WTF you talking about bish?!---again if only Jwoww was here, there would be some hair flying antics
:D yay! I smiled for the first time today! goodies lol Thanks again so much!
Glad you find some comfort in my story. That sounds like the best thing you can do, we cannot change other people but we can control how we live our own lives, and I'm glad to hear you are choosing to live yours focused on happy and loving people. It's not easy but you'll get through it.
Even though I still mourn the relationship with my dad it has made me realise I am incredibly lucky, I have other family members, friends and a fantastic FI who are always there for me and now I truly value them.
I have to say I admire your ability to stay civil to your sister and treat her with respect, not many people would be able to do that. Good luck to you.
@Bellanouva: I was hoping to get a laugh! We'll all be thinking of ya! Hang in there.
Wow, I'm sorry for the family drama. I just read the other two threads leading up to this. (Well your original posts anyway.) It sounds like whatever anger/abuse issues your dad has, so does the one sister (you and S argued over). And I'm inclined to say if S is sticking up for them, I think she also might have those issues. (IE. She's not too hard on them, because she might understand where they're coming from.) When you factor in that in uncomfortable situations, S flies off the handle and only thinks to "defend herself" with profanities and insults, tells a lot. Sounds like a cycle of violence your dad has passed on.
I hope it works out for you all.
@Bellanouva: If it makes you feel better, I had a similar situation with a very spoiled, self-indulgent, manipulative brat of a sister. It makes me cringe to know I may receive backlash from sharing...but she is no longer a part of my life. It has been over 2 years since we spoke and I don't feel an ounce of regret.
I just want you to know that I do understand and it can be frustrating. I hope you don't have to go to the extremes that I felt I needed to go to. Good luck with your sister and ((HUGS))
I'm so sorry for you, I know that it sucks to have family situations where everyone is on the side of the person who is acting like an immature child.. In the words of Will Ferrell in Zoolander: "I feel like I've taken crazy pills," because it seems pretty obvious that your sister is a drama llama and you are just trying to isolate the actual issue from all her bullshit and she is refusing to let you.
Just stay strong, have a stiff drink and spent some time with your SO.
Hun, I'm so so sorry for you. I know that you've been going through a lot lately with your sister and listen, until she comes around you are right, she isn't worth your time. When I had a lot of awful things going on with my parents I had to accept this about my mom. It took me forever to understand that I wasn't going to change her, and when I came to accept that and let her be on her way, she came back around and realized she valued my friendship.
I'll cross my fingers and hope the same thing happens for you, too :)
I am so sorry that things didn't work out the way you wanted them to. -hugs-
@Tanya123: Thats my thinking exactly. Thank you so much for your input :)
@Mrs.tobe: :D thank you for the laughs! I will have to find you in the other threads:P I think I need some more Jwoww jokes!
@lilmiss26: *HUGS* thank you for your kindness and your story. In my heart of hearts I want her to change, but my brain tells me that she will probably be this way forever. In the end, I rather go with my head, ya know?
@Rubies: Im on that like hot cakes; plan for the weekend, getting sized for ring (yay!) and time with my friends and SO. I am happy in the knowledge that I am not in fact crazy and that I have reason on my side in all this. Im also proud that I have acted maturely as well. Thanks again :)
@SweetRose2011: *hugs* thanks hun, I really appreciate your support through all this- I definitely will never forget it :)
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That is it. I am DONE.
My sister called the house today and purposely ignored me. She then proceeded to convince my parents to take up her case and they have tried to guilt trip me into apologizing to her. I have done nothing wrong, I haven sworn at her, I havent yelled at her. I wrote her a mature letter, the very one I shared on these boards. What do I get? I get her using our parents and making me into the bad guy. She crossed the line. She swore, she berated me, she told me off. I am done, I am done trying to be her friend, her sister, trying to be honest with her when everyone around her is content to lie to her, and tell her what she wants to hear. I am done trying to reason with her, and giving her the chance to apologize. I hereby recind my offer of listening to your apology S.
I dont want it, I dont need it. Its obvious from here that she couldnt be more disinterested in my existance, let alone acknowledging what she has done wrong. Thanks S, I now have TWO estranged sisters because of your ego, and your spite and your pride. Thanks S, my parents now think Im an infamous shrew because I refuse to be mistreated by you and refuse to bend on how I deserve to be treated. Thanks to your selfish and horrible actions, my parents think Im horrible for even thinking of recinding my offer for you to be my MOH.
But thankfully I have something you dont; I have the wherewithal and the honesty of self awareness to know that I shouldnt mistreat you. I have the dignity and the respect towards others and myself to know I will never return your behaviour back to you. I have a great and bright future ahead of me, and I am more than grateful for the extreme luck that has allowed me to learn these valuable skills. This stuff builds character, and I hope you realize just how much you reminded me today of who I actually am
* S isnt on these boards or anyting, but I really needed to just say these things and Vent. Rant over, and thanks for letting me do that.*
Thank you