Post # 1
My FMIL had her shower for her side of the family two months ago (or more). It went off with out a hitch – I felt like a girl in a movie – I literally just had to show up. I was literally SHOWERED with love and the whole day was a blast. I cannot even find all the words for how great this whole thing went off…
My fam said they would wait to do their side’s shower so my out of town girls could join that and the bach parties. This means they have had nearly 8 MONTHS TO PLAN IT! Srsly. ANyways – my main issue is that this last weekend – IE TWO WEEKS before the shower (and bach party the night before) I find out they haven’t sent invites yet – and they tell me its because they were expecting ME TO MAKE THEM!!!
Yes, I do design things – but when my mother in law asked about this I told her that it would be fine for her to send whatever she came up with – she got tiny little invites from a local craft store and WROTE in the information by hand. I didn’t even hear anything more about it till it landed in my mailbox (Awesome :).
But my fam – has stalled and stalled. My shower is the 3rd of August. I am sick to my stomach they want me to design something and have it ready by this morning which I didn’t because I was making my other (PLANNED) DIY’s I needed to get done. So I will be spending my lunch hour designing them and then after work I will print them out.
I am literally sick to my stomach about sending these out ONE WEEK BEFORE THE SHOWER. Its so gross – I almost don’t even want to have it and cancel it altogether…I had one awesome shower – it went great – why do I need two. My other idea is to just send them late and if noone shows up then noone shows up – I just can’t believe I am being put under this much stress this close to my wedding. Gah.
Should I tell them to cancel or let them run forward with this mess and let it just be terrible and accept it?
Post # 4
@suburbian: That’s so frustrating! Personally I would cancel it, you had one amazing shower – why not stop at that? Then you can focus on all the other wedding preparations and the bach. Also, I’m not familiar with showers, but do you think your guests would find it a little odd if the invitation was made by you? Just worried that someone would take offense and think it was gift grabby. But then again… you probably have a better sense whether this would be acceptable or not!
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
You already had a shower, so I don’t see it as a huge deal if you don’t have another one. You still have the bachelorette party, right?
Post # 6
@eocenia: It won’t be sent from my address – tech – they would never know except that my design skill is probably easy to identify…maybe.
I so want to cancel – I would be mortified to have to sit through a three hour shower that only 4-6 people (probably my b-maids) showed up to.
I am just afraid that my side of the family would be upset that they didn’t get invited to the first shower – or ask questions why I didn’t have one (If they never heear about the other shower).
I guess I don’t really care – it seems equally horrible either way. Especially since its a week away and this is only the second thing I have heard about it – I don’t even know what people are going to eat – or if there will even be food.
Post # 7
@whoa_its_ash: Yeah – I kind of agree. I also know that if I tell Mom and Sis that I want to cancel that they will call me a brat for ‘not getting my way’ regardless that it is simple ETTIQUETTE. Gah.
Post # 8
I would cancel because personally I’d rather have nothing than have people constantly remind me that my bridal shower invites were sent out late and then even though it wasn’t my fault I’d still feel like an ass (I don’t know about you, but I would personally).
I don’t know if that will hurt your mom and sister’s feelings. Maybe just tell them you would rather do something with just the two of them, like a spa day or something.
Post # 9
@megz06: I like that idea 🙂 That could be nice…
Post # 10
I would cancel it. Too much hassle for you, the bride, and it’s 2 weeks before your actual wedding. That’s hardly enough time for people to recooperate to give you a proper wedding gift. They can bring the gift to the wedding. I think you should leave the shower experience on a high note.
Post # 11
@suburbian: what about the hostess of the shower just call everyone to invite them at this point. either that or cancel. i wouldn’t make the invitations.
Post # 12
@TaurianDoll: That’s another valid point – I am so glad I posted this.
Post # 13
@suburbian: Well, you can’t really recycle anything from your invitation suite, because then they’ll now for sure. So then you’ll have to come up with something new and print it to be sent by tomorrow and hope that it will arrive by Monday… That’s tight and stressful. :/ If you want to have it, I would call your mum and say “Mum, you left this too late – there’s no way I can produce anything until tomorrow. If you want this to happen you’ll have to head down to a store, buy the cards and send them out”.
As for dealing with questions from relatives, could you just say that there were so many logistic hurdles (I mean, you have a big wedding so this seems reasonable to me) that there was no way you could pull it off? On the other hand… wouldn’t it be your mums responsibility to answer those questions?
Sorry… I’m a shower dummy, so if I’m coming with stupid suggestions – just ignore them!
Post # 14
- Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House
I would just send out a paperless post. It would give people a lot more time to plan
Post # 15
@megz06: This is a great idea. It doesn’t seem like you want the shower. You could cancel it and have a fun day with your mom and sister. You said you have people coming from out of town for the bachelorette, right? If they’re around, include them too. You could have a spa or wine tasting day or take a cooking or painting class.
Even if you make the invites today, it’ll probably be Monday before they make it to the guests.
Post # 16
The likelihood is most people won’t even get the invites until early next week!
If your Mom wants to do the shower, I think she needs to call and invite everyone and say something like “There was a horrible miscommunication about invitations. We understand if you can’t make it, but we would love to have you there!”