VENT: Mom and Sis fell through on the shower…Soooooooo upset :(

posted 3 years ago in Parties
  • poll: What should I do?
    Tell them to cancel - and deal with all the fam member questions : (31 votes)
    56 %
    Just roll with it - and endure what could be a terrible no-show shower : (24 votes)
    44 %
  • Post # 4
    3047 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @suburbian: That’s so frustrating! Personally I would cancel it, you had one amazing shower – why not stop at that? Then you can focus on all the other wedding preparations and the bach. Also, I’m not familiar with showers, but do you think your guests would find it a little odd if the invitation was made by you? Just worried that someone would take offense and think it was gift grabby. But then again… you probably have a better sense whether this would be acceptable or not!

    Post # 5
    2915 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

    You already had a shower, so I don’t see it as a huge deal if you don’t have another one. You still have the bachelorette party, right?

    Post # 8
    7654 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I would cancel because personally I’d rather have nothing than have people constantly remind me that my bridal shower invites were sent out late and then even though it wasn’t my fault I’d still feel like an ass (I don’t know about you, but I would personally).

    I don’t know if that will hurt your mom and sister’s feelings. Maybe just tell them you would rather do something with just the two of them, like a spa day or something.

    Post # 10
    3806 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I would cancel it. Too much hassle for you, the bride, and it’s 2 weeks before your actual wedding. That’s hardly enough time for people to recooperate to give you a proper wedding gift. They can bring the gift to the wedding. I think you should leave the shower experience on a high note.

    Post # 11
    6158 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @suburbian:  what about the hostess of the shower just call everyone to invite them at this point.  either that or cancel.  i wouldn’t make the invitations.


    Post # 13
    3047 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @suburbian: Well, you can’t really recycle anything from your invitation suite, because then they’ll now for sure. So then you’ll have to come up with something new and print it to be sent by tomorrow and hope that it will arrive by Monday… That’s tight and stressful. :/ If you want to have it, I would call your mum and say “Mum, you left this too late – there’s no way I can produce anything until tomorrow. If you want this to happen you’ll have to head down to a store, buy the cards and send them out”. 

    As for dealing with questions from relatives, could you just say that there were so many logistic hurdles (I mean, you have a big wedding so this seems reasonable to me) that there was no way you could pull it off? On the other hand… wouldn’t it be your mums responsibility to answer those questions?

    Sorry… I’m a shower dummy, so if I’m coming with stupid suggestions – just ignore them!

    Post # 14
    6194 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

    I would just send out a paperless post. It would give people a lot more time to plan

    Post # 15
    606 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @megz06:  This is a great idea.  It doesn’t seem like you want the shower.  You could cancel it and have a fun day with your mom and sister.  You said you have people coming from out of town for the bachelorette, right?  If they’re around, include them too.  You could have a spa or wine tasting day or take a cooking or painting class.

    Even if you make the invites today, it’ll probably be Monday before they make it to the guests.

    Post # 16
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    The likelihood is most people won’t even get the invites until early next week!

    If your Mom wants to do the shower, I think she needs to call and invite everyone and say something like “There was a horrible miscommunication about invitations. We understand if you can’t make it, but we would love to have you there!”

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