- 3 years ago
- Wedding: November 2014
Let me start off by saying I have respect and reverance for the Catholic church. I was raised a practicing Catholic and have always imagined myself getting married in the church.
I went to a music meeting last night and boy have I been fuming since. First of all as anyone who marries in the church knows, this isn’t something they’re doing for free. We’re paying nearly $1,000 to get married in our parish (lol “suggested donation”?!!?). During the meeting, the head of the music ministry talked about appropriate song choices and sang some samples (gag – I can’t stand her voice) that I was lukewarm about. Luckily, I have friends who will be singing at my ceremony anyway. She said that there’s no secular music allowed. I’m actually OK with this, but really wanted to incoporate the song “The Prayer” into the ceremony and she said she’d have to “see if that was OK” with a bit of an attitude. It’d better be OK.
Although I’m not having a flower girl, another bride asked if they prefer she have real or fake flower petals. Church lady says they frown upon the dropping of ANYTHING b/c in her words, “who’s going to clean it up?” Um, I don’t know, someone who is benefitting from my $1,000 fee, perhaps? One of your altar servers? A custodian? YOU?? She said as long as a bridal party or family member was willing to “clean it up” that she guessed it’d be OK. They’re a few flower petals, not a bag of topsoil scattered down the aisle!!!!!!!
Then they handed out sample programs but with the diclaimer that you “definitely don’t need a program” since they frown upon the “cleaning up” of that as well. IT’S A PIECE OF F’ING PAPER!! WHAT CLEANUP!? The way she made everything sound you’d think people were holding paintball tournaments in the church!!
Oh, and then there were the lovely guideline sheets for vendors (photographer, florist, limo) about how to act in the church, what to wear, what they can and cannot do, how there’s no alcohol (!??!) – that baffled me until I read on and they’re referring to the champagne toast limo’s sometimes do outside the church. I’m sorry, but if I want a photo op of a champagne toast OUT IN THE STREET, I’m going to. So basically, you expect me to hand these conduct sheets to my vendors like they’re non-professional idiots? Not happening. That’s so insulting.
And here’s my favorite part: when I mentioned I have friends who I want to sing instead of her she said, “Are they professional?” (b!tch, are YOU!?) and that if they wanted to rehearse with the pianist, there’d be a rehearsal fee!???!?!??? THIS IS YOUR JOB!!!!! WHAT IS MY $800 GOING TOWARDS ANYWAY!??!?!?!
The thing is, I believe all this uptight bullsh!t is coming from her mouth, not the mouth of my pastor. If it didn’t mean so much to me and to my family that I get married in the church, I’d have walked out of that meeting right then and there. I can’t say I’m completely shocked at some of the rules, but the attitude that came along with it was completely unnecessary. They act as though they’re doing YOU a favor! No wonder no one wants to get married in the church anymore, they make it impossible!!!