(Closed) Vent: So Irritated with Wedding Coordinator

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

Did she explain why you should change your venue?  Of all her feedback, that’s the one that would have the biggest impact on your planning… so curious why she mentioned that.

Post # 4
Member
792 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Yikes, if it’s not working out with her, perhaps it’s time to go your seperate ways. If you don’t like her attitude, it may get even worse… can you try and find someone else you will share in your vision? It’s annoying to have to fire a vendor, but you really need people on your side who will help you instead of bring you down. Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

My gut reaction is that she’s not up to the task and needs to go.  But to be fair, it is sometimes difficult to discuss things in email.  I would suggest you meet with her in person and ask her to explain what she means.  Regardless of her lack of email etiquette, maybe she is right and just needs a chance to explain.  (And if she’s wrong then get rid of her.)

Can you post your ceremony order?  Unless you’re having to meet guidelines related to a religion or something, I don’t see why you can’t do it in any way you want.

Post # 7
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

Since she’s an experienced planner, it might be worth hearing her out?  If she’s right, then you’ll have to figure out a new venue which would be better to figure out sooner than later!

Post # 8
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee

Has she experienced a wedding on the yacht before? Maybe she’s speaking from experience on the size?

If you’re not happy with her now, it may be a good time to cut your losses and find someone you can work more happily with though. 

Post # 9
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Sunset, I’m an over the top planner too with spreadsheets of to do lists and budget sheet with how much is owed and when.  But she is right about having the week of plan completed this soon.  This will change several times over the next year.  But I agree with aonther poster that she could have said it a little better in her email.  But then again some of us aren’t good at expressing ourselves in writing.  I also agree that if the venue isn’t going to work then maybe it needs to be looked at again.  Maybe she saw your guest list and thinks that you will have more at the wedding then you think.  Or she may think that with all your guests, food line, band, cake table and other special items that you’re flow may not work.  I think you would be best to call her and ask her specifics on the venue.

I will add this, my brother’s wedding the cake table was in another room and so when they cut the cake only about 20 people out of 250 could watch.  Some guests really enjoy watching the cake cutting maybe she’s concerned with something like this happening.

Talk to her and let us know what she said.

Post # 11
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

 I have to agree that listening to her reasons may be founded. Has she had an event on the said yacht before??? I’m not understanding what she means by your "ceremony being out of order" though , while i know there are guidelines it’s up to the parties involved can choose when to do things. I’d say hear her out , if her reasoning are completely unfounded you have enough time to find someone more … helpful. good luck! and you’re not the only one that plans ahead , I had my timeline set 14 months in advance based on sunset times. 

Post # 13
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I went to a backyard wedding followed by a ballroom reception.  They had cookies and punch waiting for us before the ceremony.  I thought it was great!  Everyone had some punch, mingled and chatted until it was time to start. The only thing that would have been better in my opinion was if they spiked the punch.  I see nothing wrong with cocktails before the wedding. I even considered having drinks available for my ceremony, but logistically it just didn’t work.

I still say give her a chance to explain.  Even if you decide she’s not a good fit she may have some legitimate points for you to at least consider in the planning process.

Post # 14
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I think you are right she doesn’t want to be on the boat herself.  She is afraid of getting sick again!  You might ask her! 

As for the pre-ceremony cocktail hour she might be concerned that once people get eating and drinking they may be hard to gather and get the ceremony started. And then you would have people bringing drinks and food into the ceremony.  Do you want them munching while the ceremony is going? I think your idea of trying to occupy them is very good and generous.  Maybe you can scale it back from full bar and finger foods to maybe just bottled water and candy.  Keep in mind too that you’ll have your guestbook for them to sign and many of them will mingle.

Post # 15
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

Ah great point on the seasickness!  I would actually get seasick too…  that’s a toughie.

Sounds like your planner doesn’t have the "soft touch" in dealing with brides.  Hopefully it gets better on that front, and soon! 

Post # 16
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

If she wants you to change your venue because she gets seasick, then you have picked the wrong coordinator! Look for someone with better sea legs. 🙂

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