- 5 years ago
I am a mother of the bride and I just have to vent! I will give a little back story first…
My only child is getting married and I am so happy that she has found a man that is so loving, kind, and thoughtful.
My daughter’s father and I separated when she was 15 and divorced when she was 16. It has been just her and I every since and she is now 25. Being a single parent family we really had and have to keep an eye on the check book. Planning this wedding is a strain financially but between me, my daughter, and my mom & dad we are making it work.
My daughter and I moved to the town where we now live in 2005. We really do not know very many ppl and we do not have a very big family. My FSIL has lived here all of his life and his parents have also lived here all their lives. I hate to say this because he is such a great guy, but you need all the details…her fiance is very much a momma’s boy. Not so much him, but her(if you know what I mean).
Okay..moving right a long. It started shortly after they announced their engagement. Actually…thinking about it…it probably started as soon as he told his mother he was going to ask my daughter to marry him. His mom went with him to pick out the ring. Then insisted that she and the “family”be there when he pops the question. I was under the impression (from what he said to me) that he wanted to do something special and different. I overlooked these things , even though I thought he shoud have proposed the way he wanted, I did love that I got to see my beautiful daughter’s reaction when he asked.
when we started planning my daughter decided that she wanted to have the wedding back in our home town and invite around 100-120 ppl…not too small in my book. Anyway, the FMIL was none to happy. She said that they have lots of friends and family here that would not be able to attend if they had to “travel”. The kicker to this is our home town is not quite ONE hour away. Yes, I did say just ONE hour. After considering the fact that our family is small and not as many of them would have to “travel” we caved and decided to have it here.
After choosing a wedding location we went to meet with the coordinator and she asked to attend the meeting. When we were asked how many ppl we were planning for my daughter said around 100-120. The FMIL looked SHOCKED and said…OHHH NOOO there is going to be way more than that. My daughter, the coordinator and I just kind of looked at each other and didnt really say anthing.
Planning the date was a nightmare…my daughter ended up choosing 5 different dates because every time she picked a date the FMIL would say someone couldnt be there for one reason or another (reasons were so stupid they are not even worth mentioning). We finally ended up with April 13.
Decor…my daughter wants soft and romantic so she chose white and blush and silver as her colors. Nope…she didnt like it. Can’t even tell you how many times we heard I dont like pink, that pink is too light, that pink looks like pepto bismal…blah blah blah. I finally had enough and blurted out she needs to learn her colors because blush is not the color of pepto.
My mother purchased the DYI invitations and she got back on the amount of ppl to invite kick again. I told her I was only going to pay for 150 ppl, because anything over 100 is $10/person (thats just finger foods, no sit down or buffet). I know that may not sound like a lot but to us it is. She actually said…I dont know what to tell you but there will be more ppl there than that. To which the smart butt in me replied…well I dont know what to tell you but I am only paying for 150.
My friends plan a morning coffee as a shower for my daughter and she (in a passive agressive manner) said well I just dont think ppl are not going to come to something like that because it is on a saturday and its in the morning.
Of course there has been other little passive agressive digs made about different things and lots of barging in on things that she should have not participated in (like my daughter picking out her gown) but if I wrote about them all it would be a novel.
The bridesmaids planned a 50s Housewife Shower on a Saturday afternoon and she keeps saying well I hope ppl come because Im telling you…I have lived here all my life and here ppl just dont like to go to showers on a saturday. The final straw is when the bridesmaids invitations came in the mail last saturday. They are super cute and very vintage and we just loved them. The FMIL calls and says that she got her invitation and they are cute, but…… yep there was a but…and the but was…they left out her sons name. My daughter said but why would his name be on there…and she said because they are supposed to put bride elect of so-in-so. My daughter then said well I’m sure she didnt know and if she did she would have done that. She then says…wait for it…well there will probably be a lot of ppl that wont show up because his name wasnt on it, so I hope you have a good turn out but I dont know if you will. My daughter said because his name isnt on it…and she said that and because its on a Saturday. This is the way I see it…the ppl we invited know who my daughter is and who she is marrying because they are our friends. If the “friends” she invited can’t figure out the names on the invitations then they are not close enough friends to be inviting to a shower. She has made several other small comments and to be honest with you…I truly believe she wants the shower to fail just so she can say I told you so. I honestly get that vibe from her.
Okay…I guess I am done…and yes I do feel better! Feel free to comment or add your stories so mine doesn’t make me feel so bad anymore LOL!!