Post # 1
Well, here I am almost 21 years old and engaged to my high school sweetheart for a year and a half now. Life is great and I’m extremely happy, excluding one little detail; the wedding I’ve had to postpone twice already due to a lack of funds (our budget is $3,000). Now, I realize I’m not the only bride out there faced with financial issues, especially in today’s day and age, but because of this issue, I’ve lately been debating whether having a wedding at all is even worth the trouble. Trust me, this concept is more than hard to swallow, especially since we’re talking about a person who has been obsessed with and planning her own wedding practically since birth. I guess where my dilemma lies is in the fact that no matter how hard I try, my wedding (given my budget) will never be what I’ve always epitomized it to be.
I’ve cut the guest list, asked my friend’s mother to make our cake, and have chosen to do everything DIY (from the food to the flowers to the invitations and everything in between), and yet as I make these cuts, I still find myself over budget and disappointed, because nothing has turned out even close to how I’ve always imagined it to.
I’m not sure if I’m just being picky and putting too much emphasis on one day, but at the current moment, I feel as if it would be better to elope and not have a wedding at all, than to have a wedding that wasn’t everything I hoped it would be now or when looking back on it fifty years from now and beyond.
Does anyone else feel like this, or am I the only one?
Post # 3
What specific ideas are you looking for help on. We did our whole wedding with approx 40 people tho we had enough food for atleast 60 for under $1000. While it is stressful and hard to handle sometimes it definitely is doable- don’t give up on your dream!
Post # 4
I felt like this for a while but I ended up having a beautiful wedding for 80 guests at about $4,000 so I’d encourage you to go for it. I have two pieces of advice. The first is to write out your budget. Then, look at the biggest items and slash them. My second is to think outside the box. Here are some examples.
Photographer and DJ are two things you can definitely do without. Look through your guest list. SOMEONE has to have a decent camera there. Then, get a TON of inspiration pictures and just ask that person to try to replicate them. DJ can be replaced by a computer and yes, people WILL dance.
Also, I got my food from a “food by the pound” place (kind of like they have in supermarkets). It was $310 total and tasted AMAZING. Forget about alcohol. Again, people WILL dance.
You already cut the cake, good for you. Make sure to get an affordable dress. DO NOT overlook David’s Bridal. They have surprisingly nice things for cheap.
And look at a wide range of venues. Don’t be afraid to venture a little far away from your home in search of a cheaper venue. Also, don’t overlook city parks, friend’s backyards, and other locations that could be significantly cheaper.
I hope this helped even though I’m sure you’ve already done a ton of budget-cutting research.
Post # 5
i understand completely as i am in the same boat just barely older than you and i had to scale my wedding way back from what i ever imagined it would be due to lack of money
but you know what when i walked into the church today that will host my wedding i was so amazed i almost started crying yes it’s not what i always thought it’d be or the way i thought it should work out but i realized OMG I’m getting married to the man and I love and I’m doing it with almost no money but I’m doing it bc i love him and that’s all that matters. I know that sounds so cliched but I truly understand you being upset I had to postpone my wedding twice as well. But in the end even if its not the dream it’s still worthwhile
Post # 6
we’re talking about a person who has been obsessed with and planning her own wedding practically since birth
This is the thing that bothers me about the whole Wedding Industrial Complex. The really important thing about a wedding is that it is a celebration of the relationship of two people. That can be as simple as cake and punch for your immediate family after a wedding in the park wearing street clothes, or as complex as a huge wedding with the latest fashions in attire, decor, etc. Yet when we dream of weddings since birth, the focus is on the material aspects, not on the relationship. (After all, we have no idea who our partner will even be at that point.)
Throw out everything you’ve expected a wedding to be, and think about what kind of a party (if any) you’d like, given your financial constraints, to celebrate your relationship. Maybe that is an elopement, maybe that is a small celebration with close family and friends, maybe it is something else. However, any of these things is still a wedding, as it contains the essential element: being married to the one you love.
Post # 7
Thank you guys for your encouragement and suggestions! Just knowing that others have had these issues is comforting and reassuring at the same time. In regards to cutting the budget, we’ve already chosen to use an iPod for any music and in regards to my dress, I’ve already purchased one that is being made for me. I fell in love with a dress that is $2,000 and am having it recreated for $600, which was a little more than I had wanted to pay, but my mom insisted upon doing so.
I suppose where my biggest issue lies is in finding a venue. Growing up, I had always had my heart set on having a beautiful backyard wedding at the house I grew up in, which was situated on a farm, however, when my family lost our house to foreclosure in 2008 during my senior year of high school, that dream was also taken away with the house. Since beginning my wedding planning I have looked into various locations, and have found many that I like (out of my budget range) and many I don’t like (within my range). As for using the backyard of someone I know, I wouldn’t be opposed to the idea at all if I knew someone with a big enough and nice enough backyard to do so. I guess it’s safe to say that I’m stuck in a rut!
Post # 8
Have you thought about a local park? We rented a pavillon at a local park for $50 for the whole day. Also avoid using the word wedding while looking, refer to it as a family gathering or something of sorts. That may help keep your costs down a little bit.
Post # 9
I would definitely do a wedding. Being surrounded by family and friends is the important thing. Use a local park for a venue, or even someone’s backyard. Local farmers markets are a great place to find flowers for cheap (our centerpiece flowers are $3 each). I got our tablecloths and vases and napkins on craigslist and will resell them. Dress came from a consignment shop and will go back. Music from an ipod works great. Our videographer is a student ($15 / hour). Invitations etc can come from vistaprint. Have a BBQ or takeout from Whole Foods and it will still taste great. Etc etc. I bet your wedding will still look and feel amazing.
Post # 10
@LpCutiPie: I’m actually going to look into a few more local parks… Hopefully, my mom, who’s all about having it in a ballroom (which I’m not) will be okay with the idea.
Post # 11
Just find some beautiful outside wedding pictures and I’m sure she’ll get on board… If you need any help doing some research feel free to send me a message- I love getting into this kind of stuff and I know how hard it is to keep in budget.
Post # 12
I’ve spent 2600 on my wedding total. You have to remember that the venue and photography are usually the most expensive items you’ll pay for. I’m having a family member take the photos(it’s kind of his thing) and the venue was 750.00 . A steal for the time slot and space that I have. I ordered my dress from myidress.com so I didn’t pay the designer price for that either and my veil was twenty dollars at etsy.com . If you’re looking for floral fascinators I suggest looking at forever21.com . They have a ton of floral accessories in ivory. We’re also making all of the food and most of the decorations as well. With that said, I LOVE Joann’s. They have sales all of the time and I got all of my florals and fabrics from here. Vases can be purchased at practically any dollar or thrift store. We made all of our invitations and had them printed out for FREE! (My mom works for IBM.) Find out what your family has to offer. Ours not only printed the invitations for us but we were also provided DJ equipment from our Uncle, bridesmaids dresses were MADE by my Grandmother, and even the pies( b/c cake sucks.) will be baked by my family during a pie party. With all of this in consideration, I’m still having my dream wedding. It’s possible!
Post # 13
what about local cabin rentals? they usually offer outside weddings at good prices. (though, honestly, parks are FAR cheaper… we just don’t have any where we can reserve the place without having anyone/everyone see and “join in”.)
We have a GORGEOUS place here in VA not far from where we currently live that we’ll be using. It’s the most expensive part of the wedding, but totally worth it. It’s mainly renting the cabins for x-amount of guests that’ll cost the most, but it’s still worth it to have it outside, close to home, and not have to worry with our kids getting hurt/lost/in trouble.
Post # 14
definitely go with cheap locations that DONT include the food etc. for example, i’m going with a golf course place where its $40 per person including the rental space and food and tableware, etc. i kind of wish i had paid just to rent the space and provided everything else..
one thing I 100% DISAGREE with on here is the person who said that a photographer is something you could do without. are you KIDDING me? i was gonna say the photographer is the one thing to splurge on. your wedding photos are forever. (being a photography enthusiast myself i may be somewhat biased but its probably near my number one priority for my wedding). you can find a ton of up and comers who are looking to expand their portfolio for cheap online. i found someone who had started his business less than a year ago for super cheap, and his photos are AMAZING. definitely don’t rely on someone with no experience who just wants to attend your wedding and have fun for crappy half lit pictures etc. trust me. /end photo rant
also for cheap wedding favors, you can look into making a donation in the person’s name to a charity, and usually the provide you with a little favor with your name on it for $50 or more. i’m getting some bookmarks from st judes with a minimum $50 donation.
Post # 15
My wedding will absolutely be done on a 2500.00 budget it can be done and still be elegant..its about the two people getting married not anyone else.. you really spend all that extra money trying to please folks and whats the point if you are going to be broke afterwards. Ask for help and cut dollars where you can..
Post # 16
For $3000 Why not go to the carribbean, get married on the beach, or a cliff overlooking the ocean at sunset? Most people I talk to say they wish they had eloped…otherwise you could be like a friend of mine and hold on getting married till you can afford it…