- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
My husband and i are newly weds for about 2 months. My MIL started showing becoming mean to us after we got engaged because she wanted to plan our whole wedding and she said she wants it the way she wants it. We told her no but we will definitely involve her in the planning stage. She had sent us both a long nasty email a week before we got married and I was super stressed out to the point I wanted to call of the wedding because we were not sure if she would be going crazy at the wedding. (She was screaming and crying at the rehearsal dinner at my husband’s first wedding). She had really hurt my feelings and mean, and my husband told me it is only because she cares about me. I told him, if you care about someone you don’t say really mean and awful things to that person.. Now after we got married, my MIL always knew we were planning to move but we had not set a date yet… last time we told her about moving, she was slamming the doors, screaming, crying, saying we hate her, etc and she was doing this in front of my 3 year old son. She even told my son that mommy and daddy are taking him away forever and saying bad things about us.
So we decided this time, we will send her an email. We sent a very respectful email stating the date on when we have decided to move and how much we appreciate everything my MIL and FIL have done for us. my FIL is the most easy going person and nicest person but my MIL is totally opposite.
We received back 3 nasty emails from her saying that we are so disrespectful, cold hearted so n of b***** and arrogant, that we think we are better than everyone else, we should look up respect in the dictionary because obviously we don’t know the concept of it, etc.
I was upset and frustrated because I told my husband that I hate being treated this way, but he is used to it. He said all his life that is how his mom has treated him so it doesn’t bother him.
Now, she took a couple of ptos from work and wants to pull my son out of school for that and he is in 4K. I told mu husband i would prefer not and she is welcome to see him on the weekends. but she got all mad and said you need to reconsider taking him out of school since i took pto. I eventually caved it and said okay but only this time. My husband is caught in a difficult position and he doesn’t want to say anything to his mom about how she treats us because he is afraid she will hate him. At the same time, he feels i am being vindictive and trying to get back at my MIL by not letting my son miss sschool, which I am not…
Trying to be a supportive wife and I honestly do not want him to fight with his mom, but i am so frustrated because it is not the first time she has treated us this way. I had to go trough this my one year of planning our wedding I am so tired of it. I told my husband, i will not tolerate it for the next 6 months but he said to just let this one slide and if it happens again, he will say something. .
I am not looking forward to the time when we tell her we will be alternating holidays between families. She already had my son for 3 christmases and my family has not because she gets all upset if we were not able to make it.
I have to see her this weekend to pick up my son because he is staying the night at my MIL and FIL’s house. I feel like I can’t talk to her or want to see her because I need time to process all this verbal meaness and malicious words she has said to us. I’m trying to get my husband to pick up my son because i am not ready to see her. My husband said i am being very dramatic about this whole situation.
I guess my advice is what should I do, I feel so frustrated inside but at the same time, i don’t want to cause problems between my husband and his mom. Thanks for reading.