- 4 years ago
Long time stalker, first time post. More of a rant, actually.
I just graduated high school in May. I’m a very shy person and was quiet throughout the year, having acquaintances that I spoke to in class, never hung out after school. Originally, I did not intend on buying a yearbook but my mom was so proud of me being done with school that she got the money and asked me to pick one up for her. I got the yearbook, ran some errands, and flipped through the book while waiting in the parking lot. I had to do a double take. I’m not in my senior yearbook. They don’t even have my name!
My sort-of-friend (we’re both socially awkward but unlike me he paid to have senior photos done) was also missing from the yearbook. There were dropouts in the senior section but my name didn’t make the cut!?
It was one of the most humiliating and embarrassing things having to go home and tell my mother that even the yearbook staff can’t remember my name. She returned it and we got our money back. Life went on.
Now the last blow. I applied for 2 colleges and was accepted in both. One was out of state and the one I planned on attending all through high school. I was accepted to the other (just an hour away from where I live) at the end of the school year. The out of state college would wave tuition fees for me and my parents would pay for the rest.
However, my mom asked me to go to the in state one because she was worried about me going so far away. Admittedly, so was I. I talked to my dad and he gave me the thumbs up to exit from the tuition waving school.
I’ve gone to orientation, I’ve registered for classes, I took my placement tests and have spoken with my roommate. Now I find out that, because my brother will be going back to boarding school, we probably won’t be able to afford me going to college. I’ve tried to receive financial aid but there’s little left. People I’ve talked to have ended up laughing at me for not preparing in advance. Either way the chances of me going to school this year are bleak.
This is killing me and I have no idea what I’m going to do with my life. I just turned 18 and just want to be on my own but feel too afraid to get up and go.
Constructive criticism, comments, or advice much appreciated. Thank you.