Very Disappointed

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

xpretyNpinkStarx:  Sounds like he isn’t interested in being more than friends. If you don’t feel comfortable with that arrangement it’s time to break it off.

Post # 3
Member
1072 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

xpretyNpinkStarx:  Stop doing this to yourself. He is obviously an emotional mess who is dragging you down with him. You will get nowhere with him right now, and you need to go No Contact with him for at least six months. You CANNOT be friends/FWBs with someone you have feelings for without a lot of pain and heartache. Bow out and tell him to give you a call in 6-12 months once he has sorted his head out (if both of you are still interested).

If he pulls this kind of thing again after he has had some time to process the divorce, then it’s time to give up on him for good.

Post # 4
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Ruby Princess

Fucking run. Run fast and far away from him. 

Post # 5
Member
42522 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

xpretyNpinkStarx:  This is a classic example of why I didn’t date men who had not been on their own for at least a year after ending a marriage. People need time to come to terms with themselves and their role in the failure of their marriage.

This guy found you, a willing and able, but also possibly needy woman with whom to talk, and have great sex. What more could he ask for  while he decided what to do with the rest of his life?

He now knows  that he can do pretty much anything and although you may be upset and supposedly ending the relationship when you find out what he has done, you will be emailing him and back to normal within a couple of days.

Pretty much gives him permission to get away with anything, doesn’t it?

Post # 6
Member
829 posts
Busy bee

CUT OFF ALL CONTACT IMMEDIATELY! you have to go cold turkey and move on with your life, he is a duplicitous piece of shit!!

Post # 7
Member
5282 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

I would cut contact with him.  He’s not emotionally available and you’re up for a lot of heartache if you stay.

Post # 8
Member
1072 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

julies1949:  Exactly this. You teach people how to treat you, and if you are around him while he is healing up he is going to start thinking that lying, dalliances with other women and jerking you around are just things you will ‘put up with’ in order to be with him. Have some self-respect and let him know that there will be nothing between you unless and until he is willing to treat you with respect.

Also, going from “you duplicitous piece of shit!” to “this is over!” to “kiss me!” in a few days/minutes would give anyone whiplash.

Post # 10
Member
5246 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2050

If you like drama and heartache and liars, sure, stick with this guy. You know he had sex with that other woman and would have come right back and had sex with you too. He lied. What about that scenario indicates this guy would make a good friend? Just block him, no need for discussion. He got caught, he knows it. At this point it seems like a game to you both — you asked him to kiss you? And he valiantly resisted… Looks like drama and games to me, so if you’re into that play on. If you’re looking for better, move on.

Post # 13
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

you do sound very needy and he sounds like he doesn’t care about being anything more than friends. end it now. 

Post # 14
Member
42522 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

xpretyNpinkStarx:  Absolutely. Anyone who would allow herself to be treated like this,and come crawling back for more,  has issues of her own to take care of before she looks for a partner.

Post # 15
Member
3350 posts
Sugar bee

” Am I putting off that I am emotionally needy??”

Yes, incredibly so.

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