Post # 1
Our plans have drastically changed as my OH was diagnosed with leukaemia last week. We have decided to keep our wedding date (we’ve already cancelled one wedding and right now being married seems more important than ever) but do away with reception.
So, very roughly, we are looking at having a church service followed by wedding cake and tea (or possibly champagne). It’s likely that that will be tiring enough for him (presuming that he’s healthy enough to manage that much).
Is anyone out there planning or had something similar? What traditions/wedding elements did you decide were the important ones? Did you have issues with people’s expectations? (I’m hoping our guests will understand)
Post # 3
I’m pretty sure people will understand. You need to do what is best for you and your future husband. Your day will be beautiful and special regardless as you’re commiting yourself to your soul. Also i’m sending heartfelt and genuine prayers for your situation, i’m sorry beyond belief you’re going through this x
Post # 4
- Wedding: June 2014 - Italiano's Humble
my goodness, I’m so sorry your FH is going through this. thankfully, he has a good woman by his side! I really feel what you have rough-planned, is just fine. my mom did the same thing, she just added a fruit tray and veggie tray.
I must say tho. your header says you’re marrying in August ? his health could actually improve. a good friends was diagnosed with Hodgekins(sp?) in august, and this past week was actually excited about getting back to work.
I’m not trying to be rude, but trying to say, keep ya’lls chins up and lean on one another for support. good things are just around the corner for Ya’ll 🙂 I’d stick to the small planning but just know, his energy could vastly improve, so keep the option for a larger celebration in your pocket 🙂
Post # 5
@cheetah2b: He could well be feeling better – initial treatment is 5 months. If he is well then our plan is a nice dinner and night in a posh hotel afterwards! Plus planning something big whilst he is undergoing treatment would be too much for me to concentrate on 🙂
Post # 6
@just_me: I think your change of plans sound lovely given the circumstances. People will understand.
I had to change my wedding plans when my dad was given a few months to live. People understand.
Post # 7
@sienna76: Sorry to hear about your dad.
I hope your wedding was still everything you wanted it to be x
Post # 8
I’m so sorry to hear about your FI. My dad had Non-Hodgkins lymphoma and my FI’s mom was diagnosed with rectal cancer more recently – both are now in remission, thank God.
One thing – Be careful about assuming he will be fine right after his treatment. Cancer treatment is VERY hard on the body, basically you are “poisoning” yourself to kill the cancer. The effects can take a lot of time to recover from… especially if he responds well to treatment. He will probably be a lot more fragile than either of you think and may tire easily. It looks like you are pretty on top of most of that, though.
I think the most important parts are the vows (of course), the kiss!, and first dance. Many of the other things can be discarded, but these parts are always the most remembered and cherished.
You might also look at a way that you both can be seated during the ceremony. That may help with his stamina and give him a chance to “rest” before the tea party.
Good luck and best wishes to a quick recovery and full remission for your FI!
Post # 9
@jenart: Thanks for the advice. It’s impossible right now to know how he’ll be (he’s currently lying in a hospital bed suffering from the most awful migraine). Once he’s had once cycle of treatment I hope we’ll have a better idea 🙂 The chair is a good idea – our church normally sits the bride and groom after the vows. It might be good to include more sitting during our ceremony.